Looking For Advice....

[pollypurebred39]

My husband was laid off before Thanksgiving "07" He finally is back to work. But he had to take a serious pay cut to get back to work. We are $830 every short every week. We are no longer able to pay our credit cards. We are unsure what steps to take. How long do you have to not use your credit cards to file bankruptcy on just your credit cards? Should we call our credit cards and tell them what is going on? Or is there another way to deal with this?

We cut back on everything when my husband got laid off.

Cut our cable. It was just basic for reception, so we really did not save a lot there.

Hang our laundry. Don't run the air conditioner.

Cut our food bill down to almost nothing. Some weeks like this one we won't be able to spend a dime on food. Actually I don't know really when we will have money again for food. We keep paying those credit cards. If it was not but the grace of God I honestly don't know how we would have eaten in these last few months.

Bundled our phone and internet and it is dirt cheap.

reduced our car insurance. Got rid of one car. The other is paid for in a year. Given the amount of travel my husband does for work he can not drive a clunker. His commute is a 5 hour one every single day. With driving as part of his daily job. Dependablity is a must.

Stopped paying our life insurance. Hope neither of us die!!!

Having yard sales selling off our belongings.

My husband is ill and unable to add a second job. He already is working 10 hours a day plus a 5 hour commute. Moving is not an option. I care for our special needs son and have cfs. I can not work or babysit in our home due to our son and his illness. My health has gone steadliy down hill for years and I've required numerous hospital stays.

We lost our insurance July 1 due to layoff. They sent us a paper saying we could get basic for just $600. something a month. LOL. We can't even buy food. We do not qualifiy for food stamps. But if we get a cold there is a free clinic. Praise God! We have exhuasted our savings. My husband is signed up with several headhunters for construction and he continues to send out hundreds of resumes every 2 months.

We still have some stuff stockpiled. Dry goods. Some meds. toilet paper. dog and cat food. Etc.

Just don't know where else to save or make money. And I have know idea how to handle this credit card debt. Please advise..

Polly

[FrugalMomof3]

I just want to say I am sorry you are going through this, I am sure times are really hard right now.... BUT anyway your DH can find a job MUCH closer to home? a 5 hours commute is not only exhausting but alot of money of gas... wowza!!!

After reading what you have cut out already, I dont think there is much left to cut except the internet but I am sure that isn't something you want to do.

I dont know where you live but I am sure there are local foodbanks in the area that can help you with food and with you having a disabled son in the home I dont see why you cannot get medical assistance for him and possibly food stamps or some kind of assistance, it wouldnt hurt to try.

Can you take in a border to help take away costs in the home? Meaning rent a room and they can pay for their own food and 1/4 of utilities? Just an option is all.

PLEASE let us know how things turn out and what you decide to do, I am wishing you lots of luck and sending my prayers.

[Michelle68]

Lots of ((hugs)) going out to you. Can you list your bills and income ? Perhaps someone here can help you find somewhere else to cut back. I second Tracy's suggestion regarding checking into assistance and foodbanks in your area.

--Michelle

[Mamaof2rugrats]

I would just suggest your DH finding a job closer to home. It's hard to imagine it's really worth the time spent away from home( an additional 5 hrs a day!) and the gas money. Good luck!

[pollypurebred39]

Well, My husband has alway had a long commute because of the type of work he does. Thankfully his job provides a truck and they pay for the gas. The thing is he is dang lucky to have this job. The only reason he has it is because his friend in the businesss called a in favor. The fly in the ointment though is that he is bringing home only half of what he made before he was laid off. The $830 that we are short is what he is not bringing home every week. Which totals out to our credit card bills, life insurance,prepaid oil agreement, grocery, and a loan. What is a given that gets paid no matter what is our mortgage, car payment, electric, car insurance, gas for the car, phone and internet bundle, and tithes. Our problem is his job is not bringing in the income at where are bills were set. Heck we even planned for an emergency lay off by stock piling and having a savings fund just for this purpose. Who knew the economy would be so bad that what he finally got back to work he would be getting 1/2 pay?????

My son has to use the internet to go to school. His classes are online. His advisor said that if we use their carriers that they will pay for his internet conection. Thankfully our son has his schooling paid for, $9000.00 a year due to his disability. We chose to use experimental treatments for our son so we are on our on for the rest. Best thing we ever did for him.

I've also thought about a border. I talked before with my husband about it but we have a road block. For us to take in a border we would need to do a great deal of work to our basemest, including putting in a french drain. That would be the only place to put a border and right now the basement needs a lot of work. *SIGH*

I'm not sure exactly how the food pantries work out here but I think it is based on income. I'm just guessing but I think $830. a week is too much money to get any help. But, my Mom just told me tonight that she ordered us 2 units of food from Angel food ministries. That will be picked up on the 26th. And around the same time I will get $60 dollars for trying a product for a marketing company, So that will go into groceries unless we must use it for bills.We will have to wait and see.

We frankly have been playing the credit card shuffle. Using one credit card to pay the other. We know it can not go on. My husband keeps flooding the market with his resume and not even a nibble. We just don't know really how to deal with these credit cards. I've heard people say to call them and let them know what is going on, and others say that is the worst mistake you can make. I've also been told to file for credit card bankruptucy, but to make sure we stop the credit card shuffle first because by using the cards a X amount of time prior to filing is considered fraud. We just don't know.

Thanks,
Polly

[Libby]

I'm sorry to hear that you're going through this but I agree, is it possible to get a job closer to home? Is there a job you can do at home as well...assembling something, mailing flyers out? Any hobbies you can use to profit?

I'd suggest calling the credit card companies and asking if they can offer you a deal of some sort on a lesser monthly payment or lower interest rate? I'm not sure how it is in the US but I know here, I've called and explained that I couldn't make the min payments b/c it wasn't in my budget. They advised me to stop using the card and to pay X amount of dollars which was significantly less then the min until the balance was gone. I had 6 months to do this. Luckily for me it worked out.

I am not sure about this either but is getting a consolidated loan the same as bankruptcy? See if the bank can help you group the debts and help lessen your monthly payments into one payment for all cards.

[pollypurebred39]

Libby, We'd love if he could get a job closer to home. For the last 25 years this is how it has been. Frankly we are blessed that he was given this job. There are virtually no jobs in his field right now which is why they can get away with giving him 1/2 pay. We've watched our friends in the same field lose their homes, cars etc. over this last year. We are the LUCKY ONES, he has a job. But, that said my husband still spends around 20hours every week preparing for his mass mailing of resumes every two months and than the follow up calls. Unless this economy takes an upturn or by the grace of God, this job is it.

What I've been doing is taking every spare minute and ounce of energy I have, which if you know anything about CFS you know I don't have much, and tearing the house apart for yard sale stuff. Hitting the spare room right now. Whew! It's a job. I also work part time for research marketing, but that is a hit or miss kind of thing. I also used to prepare meals for families in my home. But, since the economy has taken a down turn no one has money for that anymore. I tried having products in our home but I was unable to keep my son out of them. When he knows you don't want him in something it is like an obbsession with him. He will out wait you, you think he is asleep and then bam he's in the stuff. He wrecked an entire Avon order, so no more bringing products in my home. That's why I cooked. I would cook and then deliver. No chance of the little (He's not so little)guy getting into it then. I've sent out feelers for new clients but so far no one is interested. Everyone is playing their finances real close to their vest now. I wish I could get more marketing work but since the economy has taken a down turn, others while looking for jobs found out about this lucritive venture. The more people testing products the less jobs for me.

If we stop the credit card shuffle our credit cards no longer get paid at all. Choices are pay mortgage or credit cards. We really have no money to play lets make a deal with the credit cards. No matter what deal we made we would end up defaulting on them or not paying the mortgage. We really do not want to have to sell our home. Around here the market has plummeted to the point that you do not even get what you owe on you home. The banks won't accept the sale because of it. My sister's home value plummeted to lesss than half since they brought their home 5 years ago. She's freaking out. She owes more than her house is worth, and not because of unfair mortgage practices. Our next door neighbors just went through the same thing. They ended up pulling their for sale sign and decided there was nothing left to do but pay their mortgage and default on everything else. We keep hoping we can ride out the storm. When my husband gets paid what he is worth we have no trouble paying our bills or saving money. I really hope the tides turn soon.

We started being frugal way too late. Now don't get me wrong. We were never the keep up with the Jones type. I've always had a used car or a paid in full car. We have only taken 4 long weekend vacations our entire marriage. I've always shopped at thrift stores. We just never thought a thing about paying for doctors on credit cards. And we never saved more than a couple of months pay, with the exception of an untouchable retirement fund. We were never see it gotta have it type. But when it came to what our kids needed medically it went on the cards. Which we let get run up because we just never had a fear of not being able to pay them. Stupid us! Hindsight is always 20/20. When your pay gets cut in 1/2 that perception changes.

All the research I've done on the net does not explain how to file for credit card debt(bankruptcy) and how long the cards have to be inactive. Somewhere in the Bible there's this verse that says "my people perish from lack of knowledge" That certainly hits home right now.

Thanks Libby. After the yard sale time ends I'll need to start generating other ways to bring in food money. It certainly is something to think on.

Polly

[FrugalWitch]

I can't add any advice, but just had to say that $830 is more than my husband brought home a month up until this year. Now we make close to $975 a month.

It's just really weird that what we would find a fortune is not making it for others. That's a real eye opener.

Sorry you're going through this and I wish I had some useful advice.

[Russ]

All the research I've done on the net does not explain how to file for credit card debt(bankruptcy) and how long the cards have to be inactive. Somewhere in the Bible there's this verse that says "my people perish from lack of knowledge" That certainly hits home right now.

I can not answer your question but I did read the other day that a bankruptcy judge will look at your last few statements to see if you have been "buying things"..(high priced) prior to filing.

[suki]

You are $830 short each WEEK? Wow. Can you take on extra work? That's a whole 'nother paycheck plus that you're short.

I don't have any other suggestions... except have you sorted through your jewelry box and sold the gold? Any scrap metal you can sell?

[pollypurebred39]

Frugal Witch, Yeah that is the truth. You buy the house your pay allows. You chose you health care by your pay. If we had made what you made we would have made those money choices. But since my husband made $1660 a week that is the house we bought and that is ther type of medical care we made sure our sick son had. We never had more than a 13" tv. or loads of cable channels, or fancy toys or cars. We always had used clothes and used toys. It was all for our disabled child. But God sure has been good to us and we are thankful every single day of our lives that my husband made as much as he did or we have no idea where our son would be now. At 14 our son now has the hopes of a a good life. If we did not make what my husband made before I shudder to think of how awful my sons life would have been.

rcannon, we have made not a single charge on the cards. Only shuffling debt from one card to the other.

Suki, Like I said we've lived pretty frugally. I think I may have a pair of 14 kt. gold teddy bear earrings and of course our wedding rings. But I think that is it. As I mentioned before I have CFS and am quite ill. I've had several hospital stays because of it. Getting us prepared for yard sales is as much as I can do. I also am disabled and walk with a cane and sometimes have to use a wheelchair. And I did mention I believe that I cooked for people when the economy was better. I'm still trying to find that kind of work.

[savvymom]

A place I used to work at had a lady that would come by every Tuesday to our building (this was a very industrial area) with brown bag lunches. It had a ham or turkey sandwich (some with cheese, some without), a small bag of chips, and a soda. She sold each bag for $5, and also included her number so if everyone wanted that for lunch one day it instructed us to call her by 9:30am the same day. Everything was fresh, cold, and easy! I'm not sure if you live in an area that would allow such a service, but it was wonderful and reasonable. She made decent money from what I recall.

I am sorry to hear about your stresses right now, and truly hope things get better for you soon.

[heartofmine]

Have you tried putting some things on Ebay? My son makes extra money for college and things he needs by going to yard sales, thrift stores, pawn shops and finding items that he can sell on Ebay for more money. He does pretty good. Video games sell really well. Just recently he bought 4 games for $2.00 each and sold them for right at $100.00 on Ebay. You can set up a Paypal account for them to pay you and when they pay have the money transferred into your bank account.

I sure hope things get better for you and your family. I don't have any advice about the credit cards since I really don't use them much. Just cut out any and all spending that you can absolutely do without. If you'll look around on here there are lots of tips on making your own household cleaners and other tips to help save money. My prayers are with you and your family.

[Greebo]

Ok, polly, brace yourself, because this won't be fun to hear.

You are drowning. This isn't news. You know it.

Now - it would help if you could list all of your debts and other expenses. Debts, list name, balance, interest and minimum payment. Other expenses, just list monthly cost.

Now here's the hard stuff:
1) Sell the house. Dunno how big it is, don't care, you're down $830/week, or $3,600 a month. Whatver you've got, you can't afford. Sell it - sell it fast, and sell it short - go to the bank once you have an offer contract in hand and tell them, "You accept this short sale or you foreclose, because we can't keep the house."

2) Move to where hubby works. You can't work, so he has to - so you have to move close to his work. Rent cheap, and he can get a 2nd job.

3) I was gonna say sell the car, but I see you've got it paid for in a year, so keep it.

4) Get hubby back on life insurance - 10 year term - 1 million - $1200 a year through zander insurance, probably less cause I'm overweight and I doubt he is. YOUR SON CAN NOT AFFORD THE RISK OF HIS DAD DYING AND LEAVING YOU BOTH DESTITUTE! Same for health insurance.

5) Sell everything - sell so much your son thinks hes next.

6) MAKE A BUDGET. List everything you HAVE to pay in one month. Prioritize it. Your top priorities, no exceptions are Food, lights, car, rent, insurance. Debt is last on the list. Each time you get a paycheck, work down the list and pay what you can each month. Debt is last on the list. Debt is last on the list. DEBT IS LAST ON THE LIST. The creditors will call - tell them, "No, we don't have the money, sorry, we'll pay you when we do, stop calling." STOP USING CREDIT CARDS TO PAY CREDIT CARDS - you're digging the hole even deeper.

7) STOP USING CREDIT CARDS - period!!! You can't afford the debt you have, you sure as hell can't afford more.

8) **** the Fico score - you're credit rating will plunge when you short the house and stop paying your cards (FOR NOW). Get over it. Debt has been so good to you, you just don't need anymore anyway.

9) If you must, empty out any retirement you have to avoid bankruptcy or foreclosure if you can't find a borrower. You got into debt, you gave your word to pay back, pay them back, no bankruptcy if you have any money anywhere!

10) Once you have some extra income, have cut expenses to the bone, and hubby is working 2 jobs (sling pizza, throw boxes for UPS, whatever!!!), get current on the bills, save $1000 for emergencies, and start following the Debt Snowball plan.

You don't have a choice - it's sink or swim darlin. You can not afford that house. Banks WILL accept a short sale over having to foreclose. They lose less that way.

You have got to come to terms with the fact htat you've got a lot of "I wants" in your thinking right now that don't stand up to your situation.

I'm sorry - but there's no escaping the reality you're in right now.

[Denvergirlie]

Advice? Don't have any, you are not making it.

Sell the house, move closer to work and keep you chin up. Sounds like you can not cut anymore from your budget as it is. Sounds like you can not bring in more income as it is, so you are at an impass.
It's time to make drastic changes as keeping the status qou is not working.
I would not plan on your DH getting paid his former higher levels, to continue to think so is what has lead to your current situation.

You need action and fast.

Best of luck to you