HIGH SCHOOL REUNION - Should I go or not?

**GM97** · 07-18-2008, 12:02 PM

My high school (Manila, Philippines) will be celebrating our 20 years in March 2009. I was there last in 2003, I've been in contact with my high school friends thru yahoo website. My question is.....should i go or not? I have saved for my plane tickets, hotel and food - roughly $2000 for 10 days. I have no credit card debts, have EF. If I go that $2000 is gone, we will have a little vacation money left for 2009. Also, my oldest daughter (7) will be in school if I go in the Philippines. My Mom will watch my 2-year old daughter. My husband will make sure that homeworks and other activities will be supervised. Should I still go and attend the reunion knowing that $2000 is a lot of money and the whole family could go on vacation for that amount? I'm really confused but I would love to go and see my friends and visit my relatives too. I'm going to lunch and praying that when I get back there are advices from you guys. Thanks.

**freebs** · 07-18-2008, 12:19 PM

My answer would be to not go. You seen them in 2003 and you keep in contact with them i would say to wait a few more years when they have your 25 or so. I also wouldnt like going and my family have to stay home. I would rather take that money and do a family vacation!

**Texasgirl** · 07-18-2008, 12:40 PM

I would use the money for a family vacation. Family is what is important.

**Darlene** · 07-18-2008, 01:24 PM

March is a long way off so you can think on it a while can't you or does somebody need an answer?
Do you have family or friends there you can stay with to cut costs?
Why do you want to go? Can you put it into words?
Nobody but you knows how important this is to you. Is it just for fun or to fill some void or..
If you don't go, will you be able to "get over it"?

If it was me I wouldn't go. That was then, this is now. I'd go somewhere with my family and make some new memories. You can always get together with one or more of these people someother time, meeting at your place or somewhere else.

**GM97** · 07-18-2008, 02:01 PM

I was there in 2003 to help my Mom get ready to come over here in the US. The last time I was able to personally interact with my high school friends was in 1991 (became busy with college and job); I graduated in 1989. I guess my main reason to go there is to see old friends, no I never had boyfriends in high school since my Mom was very strict. I started visiting our yahoo website in February 2008 and that is how I found out that they are having the 20th year reunion. Several of my closest friends are here, some in UAE, Canada and other countries.

I guess I"ll get over it once it done. But by looking at pictures and stories of where they are now, what they are doing and their families, I get excited knowing that this is the chance to reminisce the old times. Of course I want to take my whole family but it is VERY expensive. Well, thank you for your thoughts, at least I heard other people's opinion regarding this.

**champagnium** · 07-18-2008, 02:07 PM

I would skip it for this year....and save the money for a family trip to the Phill's someday. My sister inlaw is from there, and I know it's really expensive, but how amazing would it be to go a few years down the road and share it with your family! While there you could make arrangements to see friends from there too.

It's always difficult to miss out on a gathering, but thru facebook or whatever hopefully you can contact everyone. And look at using phone cards to make phone dates to catch up too.
My friends in Korea and England and I do this, it's $5 for a phone card, and that gets me over 300 minutes. I get some drinks, snacks, and set aside a few hours to really catch up on everything going on with them...

Hopefully you don't feel too too bad about missing out.

**IntlMom** · 07-18-2008, 02:38 PM

I'm actually struggling through the same exact thing (minus the phillipines, of course!)...my 20 year is in Sept of this year. I just got back from my hometown (Olympia, WA) a few days ago. I was there 2 weeks, and enjoyed myself tons. However, I have NO contact with any of my schoolmates, and really no desire to have any. I loved high school, but like someone said, "that was then, this is now!" I'm thinking I;m not going to go, unless a deal of an airfare drops into my lap.......let us know what you end up deciding.

**frugalandsimple** · 07-18-2008, 03:53 PM

Originally Posted by Texasgirl

I would use the money for a family vacation. Family is what is important.

That's what I would do too. It would be more fun in the long run, at least in my opinion.

**shoiji** · 07-18-2008, 05:41 PM

Since you are already keeping in touch with you friends is there anyone else from school you really need to see. You did mention visiting your relatives though. Do you have any relatives you think you should see now (with advancing age)? If so then I would go. But if you think you could wait and save up and go in maybe another year or two with your family then I would do that.

**angelbumpkin** · 07-18-2008, 06:06 PM

I would go on a family vaction.

**nodmicks** · 07-18-2008, 10:24 PM

Sounds like you have the $$$ and a funded ef.l If it is important to you I'd go. Life changes fast and in all hone4sty who is to say you will ever be able to see them again. I always say people first~ money last after seeing my dad slave and slave for retirement and passing before he enjoyed a second of it. Life is short! If you can afford it see your friends

**GM97** · 07-20-2008, 07:49 AM

Originally Posted by gg

It sounds to me like you would very much like to go and that you have figured out childcare etc. as well as priced everything. Since it's been 17 years since you've last seen your friends and you are still so close (in heart and feeling) I say go! Vacation with family can still be done in a creative way!

Maybe you could take a temporary second job for a few hours per week to help raise money, so you don't feel guilty? Because I sense you feel a bit guilty about spending money to see your friends after so long?

Friends are like extended family in the Philipines. I know that well, because we have many Phillipinos here in HI. Family, including extended family, is very important.

Talk it over with your partner and see if there is a way through this so all are happy about it. He sounds like he wants you to go re assuring you that he'll be there to supervise your child's homework.

oh yeah, i'd love to go but i was trying to weigh things out. yes, i feel guilty spending that amount of money just for myself if i could use it for the whole family. Actually, I have a friend in HI who is going to visit next year and we were talking about who's who in the batch now. But it seems like my second gut is telling me not to go. I talked to my DH last night and he was surprised (he knows how excited I am just talking to my old friends) and he said, it's a long time so if you change my mind let me know. oh he is such a sweetie. i'll let you guys know if i went. thanks!

**Sundae** · 07-20-2008, 08:11 AM

GO.... The kids are young where even going to the park for the day for them is extreme fun, the 2 yr. old wil not remember a vaction. And it sounds like everything is worked out to take care of the family. Your DH can have some great one on one time too with DD. go-- go-- go-- We all think and put our family first, but sometimes we forget that we are someones family and they want to put us first, take some time for yourself, we all need that time!!

**englishcottage1** · 09-06-2008, 01:32 PM

I'll be looking for your post later to see if you went or not. I'm kind of in the same boat also, my 20th is next May in my hometown out in CA. I have to decide also, I don't want to spend the money to go but I don't want to regret it later.....

**LuvMyHubby** · 09-06-2008, 02:23 PM

good luck with whatever you decide. I know my decision would be easy. I hated every moment of high school and wouldn't pay 20 bucks to ever see those people again let alone 2000. Yeah, it was that bad.