Do you feel we have become a little more rude with the change in technology?

**cheriede** · 08-07-2008, 02:39 PM

My family was leaving a restaurant today and we happen to notice two young ladies getting out of the car. Both of ladies were on their cell phones just chatting away. I guess this just really struck me as odd for some reason. Since when is the person on the phone more important than the person sitting next to you in the car? To me it just seems that the person that is sitting next to your should be given the priority. Is that phone call REALLY more important that it can't wait until a few minutes? I know there are some expections to this. If I am out with someone or someone is visiting my house, I typically do not answer the phone. About the only time I answer a call is from the doctor or my child's school. If I know ahead of time that a call will be coming in, I will let the person know. Other than that, the person in front of me has my full attention. I never want anyone to leave with the impression that their time isn't important and they can just wait on me.

I was in church it's not that uncommon to hear cell phones ringing. I know people forget to turn them off. Anyways, we just finished receiving communion and someone cell phone goes off. The person actually answers the phone and I hear the guy tell the person on the other end of the phone..."Oh nothing, we are just finishing up Communion". He didn't even bother to leave the pew to take the phone call. Ok..you just received the body and blood, Mass hasn't ended and you are taking a phone call in the pew??? I think I would have to hurt my child if I EVER caught him/her doing something like that. LOL!!!! Ok..Maybe "hurt" is a bit dramatic, but you get the drift.

My dh is a college instructor and he tells me about his students IM and texting all the time while he is teaching in the computer lab. Yep, he catches them doing it. Again, I think I would have to hurt my child...LOL First of all, I'm paying money for your education and you should be learning sometime..not texting. Secondly and more importantly, it's just flat out rude.

So, I'm curious to know some of your thought on this subject. With all the gadgets that we have in this day and time tends, do you feel that people are so caught up with these devices that common courtesy and proper etiquette is just thrown out the window?

**The Muse** · 08-07-2008, 03:06 PM

I do believe that by and large common courtesy and etiquette are things of the past.

I think we've become too wired. Do most people REALLY need to access the internet on their cell phones? Do they REALLY need to be chatting while driving, shopping, etc.? Probably not.

A few weeks ago, DH and I went to upgrade our cellphones because our contract was up and my phone was broken. The sales guy could not grasp the idea that not only did we not want Web enabled on our phones, but we didn't want unlimited texting. It was so obnoxious that we ended up leaving without phones. We bought unlocked refurbished phones online for less than the contract price after rebate and we are still blissfully contract free.

**frugalbabe** · 08-07-2008, 03:14 PM

Yeah I actually just called to have the texting part of my phone taken off because I found out I was paying $10 a month for a feature I will never use and find annoying. A few weeks ago dh and I were at a restaurant and there was a young couple sitting at a table just chatting away on their phones I don't think they ever actually talked to each other! Or how about the mom who is shuttling kids and shopping the whole time while talking on the phone I actually have a friend who wears her bluetooth ALL of the time and you can see her just chatting away on it all day. But then I am just as guilty of putting kids off to look at this forum so maybe I am the pot calling the kettle black!

**fernykins** · 08-07-2008, 03:40 PM

I hate being someplace and all you her is people talking on their cells.......... I will answer the phone if certain people call only because I have family members that are very ill, other wise I can return the call later. I do think people are ruder because of all the tecnology in todays time.
Fern

**elphie** · 08-07-2008, 03:57 PM

I think it is easy to blame the rudeness on the technology. People are rude, not cell phones. The same people who obnoxiously answer phones at church and talk too loudly on them at the store are the same ones who will chat through a movie with their neighbor. My s-i-l will answer her phone in the middle of a sentence but she will also change the subject in the middle of a conversation if her mind wanders. The cell phone is just one more way for her to express her self centerdness, it certainly isn't the cause of it.

I have the same policy with my cell phone that I have with my house phone... just because a phone rings doesn't mean you have to answer it. People get mad and complain that I never answer my phone... I say the phone is for my convienence, not the convienence of others to reach me at any and all times regardless of what I'm doing.

**sixfreds** · 08-07-2008, 04:00 PM

I will say I text and love it!! I like being connected all the time..

That being said I NEVER talk on the phone if I am out with someone, I never talk on the phone while I am in a public place (restaurant, store any where) I keep my phone on silent with it on vibrate all the time.
I have taught my daugher who has a cell phone not to be rude if you are with a friend you don't need to be on the phone with someone. Nothing is so important you should be rude and talking on the cell in public or when you are with someone it jsut rude!!

Eileen

**Samigirl** · 08-07-2008, 04:02 PM

I totally agree. We were on vacation last week, in a beautiful part of the country. We were hiking along a trail and came across another family. As we passed, we saw the dad, mom, and sons exploring an awesome cave and waterfall. The teenage daughter was off to the side, totally ignoring everything because she was text messaging! It floored me. Some family vacation! I would put my foot down if I were her parent.

It also annoys me whenever I'm trying to visit with someone and they keep checking their text messages. I think it's quite arrogant to expect a friend to patiently wait while you text another friend or answer your phone multiple times. I have a cell phone too (without text messaging). I don't even think about answering it when I'm having a conversation with someone else. They have my undivided attention and I expect that from them too. (Of course I'm not talking about emergencies or important phone calls....I'm complaining about casual calls and text messaging.)

**ktsmama** · 08-07-2008, 04:04 PM

Originally Posted by elphie

I think it is easy to blame the rudeness on the technology. People are rude, not cell phones. The same people who obnoxiously answer phones at church and talk too loudly on them at the store are the same ones who will chat through a movie with their neighbor. My s-i-l will answer her phone in the middle of a sentence but she will also change the subject in the middle of a conversation if her mind wanders. The cell phone is just one more way for her to express her self centerdness, it certainly isn't the cause of it.

I have the same policy with my cell phone that I have with my house phone... just because a phone rings doesn't mean you have to answer it. People get mad and complain that I never answer my phone... I say the phone is for my convienence, not the convienence of others to reach me at any and all times regardless of what I'm doing.

I agree with this post 100%.

I have actually said the exact words that I have highlighted in red to my EX-DH. LOL

**Greebo** · 08-07-2008, 04:10 PM

wtf? r u on crak? stfu! im no rude!!

**monkeywrangler71** · 08-07-2008, 04:27 PM

I just finished reading A Short History of Rudeness by Mark Caldwell, it was very enlightening.

Etiquette is constantly evolving and has been since the beginning of time. People have always been rude, people have always been courteous, and people have always complained that civility is disappearing.

**Quadcam** · 08-07-2008, 04:37 PM

thats one of my biggest peeves, when i would work the airline ticket counter and people would come up to check in and they're yackin on their phone. You try and ask them a question and they're too busy talkin to bother to answer you. it got to the point where I would call next in line and if that person was on the phone and didnt hang up and started walkin up to me I would say.."i'll take the person behind you and when you finish your phonecall you'll be next" you should see the looks people give you after that LOL....

same thing happened in the store the other day, I was behind this guy in the express checkout..as the cashier is trying to ask him a question his phone rins so he answers it and proceeds to talk away while the cashier is standing there like "helllllllllooooo??"
then he finally hangs up and decides to take his wallet out. the cashier is lookin at me rollin her eyes I just kinda nodded like "yep, i know what ya mean"

**spyzvixxen** · 08-07-2008, 05:03 PM

Originally Posted by Quadcam

same thing happened in the store the other day, I was behind this guy in the express checkout..as the cashier is trying to ask him a question his phone rins so he answers it and proceeds to talk away while the cashier is standing there like "helllllllllooooo??"
then he finally hangs up and decides to take his wallet out. the cashier is lookin at me rollin her eyes I just kinda nodded like "yep, i know what ya mean"

This same thing just happened to me the other day. So rude!

I like to think of cell phones as enablers for instant gratification. If not for cell phones, the one owner of my company would be locked in a home somewhere. What part of "she's in the bathroom" (her assistant) and didn't bring her cell phone with her didn't you get? Ugh!

**The Muse** · 08-07-2008, 05:04 PM

I just got home from the grocery store and thought of this thread while I was there!

When I walked in, there was a woman standing in front of a produce display yakking on her phone. I did my shopping and forgot a green pepper, so I had to go back and she was STILL standing there yakking, nearly stepped on me when I said "excuse me" to get to the peppers.

Not only do I not understand why anyone would want to have a lenghty conversation in such a public place, but I can't fathom being that inconsiderate to others.

**elphie** · 08-07-2008, 05:39 PM

Originally Posted by monkeywrangler71

I just finished reading A Short History of Rudeness by Mark Caldwell, it was very enlightening.

Etiquette is constantly evolving and has been since the beginning of time. People have always been rude, people have always been courteous, and people have always complained that civility is disappearing.

Yep, I think there is a tendancy as we get older to compare things to when we were young and have a "The world is going to hell in a handbasket" mentality. The problem with that is that we remember things the way they were for US, not the world as a whole, and we tend to cling to the good memories of old, not the bad.

**Pemberleyan** · 08-07-2008, 06:27 PM

Yes, we've lost a lot of common courtesy and manners. I was in a funeral of a dear friend last week and someone's cell phone went off and rang and rang!