Which would you put first?

[Luv2BeFrugal]

Ok...random thought... I know most of us are very focused on our financial health...we strive to pay off debts, be frugal... I'm just curious to what extent we all would take it...how would we FVer's "prioritize" as a whole...

Which would you put first if you had to choose...your emotional/mental health or your financial health?

And I mean long-term situations...
And you had to clearly choose one over the other.

Would you sacrifice your emotional/mental health in order to pay off debts or keep debts down (like bad living situation, bad work environment, etc.)?

- OR -

Would you sacrifice your financial health, taking several years longer to pay off debts (say 3 years longer), in order to have an emotionally and mentally healthy situation?

I know so many people in this situation and most (but, not all) choose their emotional/mental well being...but, they're not very frugal. So...got me to wondering about the Village folks...

I'm anxious to see how you all vote!

[mombottoo]

I would rather be emotionally/mentally healthy than financially healthy any day of the week.

[GM97]

For me, it is hard to be financially healthy if you are not emotionally well.

[HisDaisy]

I would have to say my emotional/mental health. However does not mean that I would not be frugal in doing so. I think that you have too strike a balance. For some the stress of poor financial health would cause emotional/mental health issues, so pay off debts faster would help.
For others, especially those prone to mental health issues, they may have to focus on mental health issues to the slight detriment of financial health.

[Texasgirl]

Emotional and mental health would come first.
What good are you to your family if your not emotionally and mentally healthy.
The bills will always be there.

[Grayce]

Emotional health is more important to me but part of that is feeling financially secure. I tend to worry and I would not feel good at all if my finances weren't in order.

[Ceashels]

Poor emotional and mental health will lead to poor physical health. There has to be a balance between those and financial health or you won't have any of them.

[mommy4ever]

Depends on what you consider emotional health. If a person is being too frugal and feels deprived, then one would let up *a little* to get rid of that feeling of deprivation, is actually a good thing, as it makes frugality have longevity.

however if the emotional well being is dependant on a new car every 2 years or a big travel vacation once a year at the expense of their financial situation, I'd say suck it up buttercup and make do with your current car, and no big ticket vacation. Yes one needs a vacation to rest from work, but that can be done within a couple hours drive or even at home.

From what your post says though, I'd be willing to sacrifice a pay cut for a better work environment, i'd pay a higher rent if it meant our safety. 3 years in the whole realm of things is only three years, if you weren't being frugal at all, there would be NO end in sight. Who's to say it really will take 3 years more? The new job might lead to bigger and better things, and actually shorten things.

I'd say mental/emotional health within reason. It's not wise to grow wild with your spending just because.. A better housing situation doesn't mean renting a penthouse, or quitting work without something lined up. It doesn't mean not working because you're not being paid what you feel you're worth, you need to prove that. And I don't mean working for nothing.

I know some one who couldn't afford the Jeep she had, she was in the whole, she was tryin gto sell it, some one offered her $500 less(she was priced wayy too high this was an awesome offer), she said no, ended up stuck with it and had to trade it un for $7000 less than she offered because she was falling behind on payments. That didn' tmake sense to me.

My BIL is always fretful about their finances, also has the attitude that he grew up with nohting, very deprived. So he got a better job so they could pay bills. well, that means a new truck, a new RV, a new Seadoo. not used but BRAND spanking NEW. A trip to Mexico, to Alaska, ummm.... oh a new car as well. So now he's added about $1000/mo or more in payments eating up the pay increase and then some, but their son can't go to college because they can't afford it. Between the 2, they earn almost 1/4 mil a year, but owe about 1/2 Mil.(not including their brand new house valued at $500K)

And they go on and one that we'll never afford to help our kids education since we have 4. Well... let's see... we don't spend like that, yes we have some stupid debt, but it's not out of control and we are actively payin git off. Yes, we indulge on occasion, we bought a 10 yo RV, but it's 3/4 paid off since May(when we got it). We'll be ok. I see bankruptcy for them soon. I give it 2 years if they continue on the same path. Thankfully their son is aware of what they are doing. He got a truck for his b'day, he refuses to drive it unless it's to work or on planned errands. He has a $18/hour job. He's going to do ok, he's doing an apprenticeship and has a plan. Their daughter has a long way to go. She works so she can shop. At least it's not on credit.

[annymoll]

I would stay in a job I disliked if it was all I had and meant putting food on the table, especially if I had children and a family to support.(But I would look for another job.)Otherwise, no, I would not stay in a job that was mentally or emotionally draining.

[LexTysMommy]

I put emotional but i am torn on this one.

I would work a crappy job to pay the bills. I would not work a physically crappy job to pay bills though. I would work long hours to pay bills. that cannot be good emotionally/mentally but i would.

HOWEVER.

If i became sick because of the work I was doing, or physically hurt, i would not do it.

I would not live in bad part of town with my kids to save money, i could find other solutions.

So really i dont know how I shouldve answered. im confused. LOL

[dcompton]

I agree with Grayce and Ceashels. Financial well being is important, and is a component of emotional and mental well being. But if I had to pick one over the other, I'd definitely go for emotional/mental. If you are emotionally and mentally strong, you at least have a chance of dealing with financial hardship without destroying yourself. This said, there are, short term, always trade offs.

[Luv2BeFrugal]

Wow! Lots of good input!

I was going for a generic scenario of "it would take several years longer to pay out of debt, but you'd be in a good place" vs. "you'd be out of debt those several years earlier, but be mighty miserable until then". (There would be food/shelter/utilities covered adequately, but not lavishly, in either scenario).

For me, I'm so scared of debt that I lean more towards the financial security. Which is probably why I am always stressed out!!