Stressed...just stressed

**khjmom** · 11-19-2008, 10:19 PM

just need to vent for a moment...

The last few days of work have been horrible. I have had kids come to school with no coats, one with no socks and another wearing the very same shirt that I put on her the day before (mom didn't have the money to do wash and the ones she had washed out at home weren't dry). It just hurts to know that so many of my kids are struggling to just have basic needs met. We have a clothing closet at school, which is wonderful....and a local church group brings us things for it each month. It's just the constant visits that keeps showing me how many are not getting all the need. Then today, well it was dental screening time. We had over 40% of my one class that had major dental issues, two that they were trying to reach parents so they could be treated today. Neither had said a thing about their mouths hurting...one said she didn't want to hurt her mom because she knew they didn't have money. We have others that are coming in just like they are starving to death...and they want to eat a couple of breakfasts.

Now don't get me wrong. Our parents for the most part are concerned and involved in their child's education. I have just had so many tell me as of late that they just don't have the funds, because of rising costs and job cutbacks. I can only imagine how they must feel knowing that they can't get the basic stuff for their children. They are trying....I know they are trying. I just can't imagine being in their shoes where you have to choose between food or heat, coats or food....etc.

I know that I need a break...and it is coming next week. I know I can't keep taking this to heart...and my wallet is hurting too. (I keep buying snacks that I can give them in the evening to take home). We are a Title One school and receive alot of support for our children's needs from the school system and a local church. We even have a free breakfast program, but we as a school can only do so much. It does make me go home each day and think long and hard about my blessings. My boys and I have talked alot about how blessed we are, especially when we can see how others are living. But it still breaks my heart.

Thanks for just letting me vent....

**madhen** · 11-19-2008, 10:26 PM

Wow, that sounds terribly hard to take into your heart every day. You are a wonderful person for doing all that you can do. I just quoted something in another post, so at the risk of sounding preachy, I wonder if you ever saw the little quote about the boy on the beach, tossing starfish back into the ocean? The gist was that there had been a high tide, and hundreds of starfish were stranded and dying. A man sees a little boy picking up starfish and tossing them back into the ocean. The man says to the little boy, "There are too many. What you are doing will make no difference." The boy picks up a starfish and tosses it into the ocean, looks at the man, and say, "I sure made a difference for THAT one."

Thank you for making a difference, one starfish at a time. You may not be able to help them all, but think how much better off those you do help are for you being there.

**perSue** · 11-19-2008, 10:31 PM

you are a wonderful & caring person - not only to be a teacher (i assume)- but to concern yourself personally with these children.

try to think of the good about these situations... there ARE options... kind people like yourself, the church, the screenings (which i assume are free)... these are GREAT things that not all schools offer.

if you feel you can't do much more... what about enlisting other teachers to put into a "pot" for snacks or really small holiday gifts or "student of the week/month" things so these kids can feel special.

is there any other community service that these kids could take home info about? (or is that against the policies?).

it's really comforting to know that there are such caring people out there who wish to do so much more for our children. i commend you.
but i also understand your feelings.

try to think of some constructive ways to help these kids & their families... can you (or a group of you) "sponsor" a family for the holidays??

wishing you patience.

**khjmom** · 11-19-2008, 10:50 PM

Originally Posted by perSue

you are a wonderful & caring person - not only to be a teacher (i assume)- but to concern yourself personally with these children.

try to think of the good about these situations... there ARE options... kind people like yourself, the church, the screenings (which i assume are free)... these are GREAT things that not all schools offer.

if you feel you can't do much more... what about enlisting other teachers to put into a "pot" for snacks or really small holiday gifts or "student of the week/month" things so these kids can feel special.

is there any other community service that these kids could take home info about? (or is that against the policies?).

it's really comforting to know that there are such caring people out there who wish to do so much more for our children. i commend you.
but i also understand your feelings.

try to think of some constructive ways to help these kids & their families... can you (or a group of you) "sponsor" a family for the holidays??

wishing you patience.

I actually got an just email from a friend of mine who is going to try and pull some strings for healthy snacks. He works for a food company....what a blessing that could be. Our school nurse knows of my concerns in regards to the dental stuff. She is in the process of trying to help the parents apply for help...we had one that didn't think he could get help because he can't fill out the forms....he can't read them. Every bit of help we can get is great...but it takes time and alot of work. Right now we are working on wish lists for quite a few of our kids and then sponsors so that they will have Christmas. I love my students, they will tell you that they are my kids...because I tell them that all the time. I guess the biggest thing is that I am just so tired. There is alot going on personally, and then to deal with this at school each day is draining. Thank you for your kind words.

**khjmom** · 11-19-2008, 10:51 PM

Originally Posted by madhen

Wow, that sounds terribly hard to take into your heart every day. You are a wonderful person for doing all that you can do. I just quoted something in another post, so at the risk of sounding preachy, I wonder if you ever saw the little quote about the boy on the beach, tossing starfish back into the ocean? The gist was that there had been a high tide, and hundreds of starfish were stranded and dying. A man sees a little boy picking up starfish and tossing them back into the ocean. The man says to the little boy, "There are too many. What you are doing will make no difference." The boy picks up a starfish and tosses it into the ocean, looks at the man, and say, "I sure made a difference for THAT one."

Thank you for making a difference, one starfish at a time. You may not be able to help them all, but think how much better off those you do help are for you being there.

I had to print that off to share at work tomorrow...thank you.

**justpeachy92** · 11-19-2008, 11:52 PM

Is there a dental school near where you are at. I know there is one about an hour from me and they offer discounted dental services, most things are 50-70% cheaper then at a dentist office. I know at the school near me they even pay for people to let the students do deep cleanings and other procedures when the students are being tested. If these services exist in your area it might be worth gathering the information and sending it home to the parents.

**Lori Biever-Launder** · 11-19-2008, 11:55 PM

I volunteer at our local elementary school for SMART (Start Making A Reader Today). It, too, is a Title One school and there are tons of kids who qualify for free or reduced lunches. I actually helped one little girl who hadn't told anyone she couldn't see the letters in her book very well (she needed glasses BIG time). We also serve as a sounding board for the little ones. One boy told me his dad couldn't read to him because he was in prison. It was sad, but he was very matter of fact about it.

I try to take in books we no longer use at home (my DSs outgrew them) and have passed coats, etc. along as well.

I see these same kids at work a lot. Thank goodness they are using the library--great use of resources! They need every extra advantage they can get.

**HandyMom** · 11-20-2008, 02:56 AM

I hope you get a much needed rest. You can only do so much and you have to take care of you first so that you can continue being the shining example that you are to everyone else.

**prftstrngr** · 11-20-2008, 06:24 AM

Your doing a good thing! I cant imagine how hard it would be to see them needing like that. Id want to take them all home with me! Just remember the school is giving them one good meal a day and the churches help with clothes is awesome! You have a great heart and your doing an awesome job.

**joyofsix** · 11-20-2008, 07:08 AM

You are a kind person and are making a difference. I hope a little break helps. My kids go to a Title I school so I know what you're talking about.

**rosey7415** · 11-20-2008, 08:01 AM

take care of yourself before you burn out!!

i think it is just wonderful what you are doing to help these children. just think if we all could do a little something for someone in need.....in any small way. i do a lot of small pay- it -forwards. nothing on a big level....can't afford it. but to make someone's day a little brighter. we can all do a little something in our day to day lives.

that does sound a little preachy.....sorry......

**jamie79** · 11-20-2008, 08:02 AM

You are a wonderful person to take these kids into your heart. I know it must be so hard to see them hurting. Sending all of you good thoughts

**ktsmama** · 11-20-2008, 10:05 AM

Saying a little prayer that you will get some much needed rest. Please take care of yourself!!

And a big THANKS for all you do.

**leezza** · 11-20-2008, 11:00 AM

Thank you for being a good, caring teacher......You make such a big difference!

Ask anyone who comes from a very poor background if they remember any of their school teachers and I betcha they can name a 2-4th grade teacher by name that helped them........

Case in point my Dad who is 70 can tell you the name of his 3rd grade teacher and how she help incouraged him. You see it really does matter.

leezza

**khjmom** · 11-20-2008, 04:12 PM

Well, today was a little better. We will be able to have a mobile dental unit come in to help some of the kids. The majority others will be going to their dental office to have work done.I had three bags of snacks and such brought in to send home next week so they can continue to have breakfast and then lunch. Now I am working on getting the holidays taken care of so that they have a Christmas. I am feeling better...and greatly appreciating the kind words. Thank you.