Children's Clothes...what are they thinking???

[phoeny_moonstar]

Hmmm.... where do I begin? I may be taking the alternative route here but my anyways :

I refuse to let my DD grow up being ashamed of her body. I have met and seen so many people who have little to no self confidence and use "baggy shirts" to hide their bodies. That said I will also not let DD (who is turning 9 in feb.) walk out of the house looking like a streetwalker. Yes she does year spaghetti strap and halter top shirts and has since she was a lil'un. She does wear two piece bathing suits even though the stores consider her to be kids "plus" (gawd I hate that term for kids!!!!!!) I am bringing her up in an environment so she is happy with her appearance and I don't want her to feel ashamed of what she was born with.

I can totally agree with people who are talking about kid clothing looking more and more grown up. The American people have no one is blame but themselves.

Sorry if this post was all broken up and doesn't make any sence... I just woke up a lil bit ago.

[Shoshana]

Gymboree clothes are very good quality and style - their sale prices are excellent. Gymboree is a treat, tho', as we rarely go to the malls.

Children's place has even better sale prices, but some of the styles are too tacky, and the quality isn't as good.

Ugh -- the worst! I happened upon a Libby Loo yesterday that was going out of business. Even with 50 to 85% off everyting in the store, the only thing I managed to buy was a pair of slippers!

[Mamaw]

It is very hard to find good quality children clothing that is age appropriate in the Pitts area. I find Gymboree is good but unless it is a sale, way too expensive. I love the idea of trying the boys department. I never even considered that! Might be good tee shirts style items there. I may be old fashioned but I still love children to look like children. My daughter is planning on sending the girls to a private school so there is a dress code. Either uniforms or the blue pants and skirts and white tops I believe. What a relief!

[MomToTwoBoys]

I'm finding the attitudes displayed here... to be more and more common... and, quite frankly, they are beginning to get on my nerves.

What many of ya'll don't seem to understand (don't care to understand?)... is that, in America at least, everything is warehouse style.

Ie., instead of grouping by age like we used to do... we group by size.

My fiancée is 4ft something (my memory is acting up again)... and she still has to shop in the 'kids' sizes.

Should she not have the right to look 'sexy' if she chooses, just because of her small size?

Just because something is 'inappropriate' for someone so young... does not mean it's inappropriate altogether.

Many of you ladies here fall under the group called 'plus size'.

Should you not have the right to feel sexy just because you're bigger than manufacturers care to market too?

Ya'll need to keep in mind that your preconceived prejudices don't always align with reality.

Just because a piece of clothing is small... does not mean it was meant for your pre-teen.

I, however, will note that there is a disturbing trend amoung parents to 'sexify' their children... but this is a result of too many generations who grew up watching the 'idiot box'.


ETA: Nishu's quote, for the reference, was chosen because it highlights my points about size and age.




I have to admit... I didn't even know what a 'halter top' was.
I actually had to go look it up on google.

The versions in pictures I saw... look like they'd be more suited to formal occasions.

As far as functionality goes... I don't see much difference between those and an ordinary tank-top... and many kids (boys and girls) wear those. On a hot summer day... I could easily see something like that being desirable over the standard t-shirt... if for no other reason than to keep from getting heat stroke.

The other thing to consider... is that most kids don't tend to have 'inhibitions'. If it's hot... the clothes are coming off (at least... until 'that' age). I'd rather see a girl with a halter on... than no shirt at all... which is more likely if she was wearing an ordinary t-shirt.

Just my

Jason

I'm 5'11" and the stuff that's meant for people my age wouldn't fit me. There's absolutely no way I can fit into something meant for the average woman both in terms of size and length. I have to wear size 28/36 jeans because I have a small waist and really long legs and it's been that way my entire life.

I think it's "cute" for parents to want to put their kids into things that they feel look ideal for the age. You have to remember, though, that when your kids get to be the age where clothing is everything then some kids can be pretty cruel. They will mock the living crap out of a kid because they're wearing something that isn't "with the times". If you want to dress your kids like the Duggars, chances are that kids are going to endure alot of psychological abuse from other kids their age. I was pretty ridiculed as a kid because I was dressed in pants and t-shirts that my parents felt were appropriate for my age, and this was back before the whole "trashy" clothing trend started.

Trends are a big thing, and there are clothes out there that can be trendy and still reflect personal style. You have to take into account that not all clothes in a particular size are meant for a specific age group. I can squeeze into clothes meant for a 16 year old. That doesn't mean I should have to walk around with graphic tees or a Hello Kitty emblem on my pants.

[Shoshana]

I think it's "cute" for parents to want to put their kids into things that they feel look ideal for the age. You have to remember, though, that when your kids get to be the age where clothing is everything then some kids can be pretty cruel. They will mock the living crap out of a kid because they're wearing something that isn't "with the times". If you want to dress your kids like the Duggars, chances are that kids are going to endure alot of psychological abuse from other kids their age. I was pretty ridiculed as a kid because I was dressed in pants and t-shirts that my parents felt were appropriate for my age, and this was back before the whole "trashy" clothing trend started.

I think there's a HUGE space between dressing preschool and grade school kids in homespun/Amish/Duggar style clothing and dressing them in the trashier style (think, Brats) that is being marketed to those age groups. My 5-yr-old is stylishly and "appropriately" dressed (my version of appropriate, of course), and she looks like neither extreme. There are lots of options out there, if one has the time to look. Using the fear of cruel classmates, or the pull of being one of a crowd, to allow a child that age to dress in lame, sequins, and 'sexy' style clothing is rather silly, imo.

[Shoshana]

http://http://www.apa.org/pi/wpo/sexualization.html

Here's an excellent series of articles published by the American Psychological Association on the sexualization of girls, its consequences, and tips for parents.

[reginaastralis]

I'm finding the attitudes displayed here... to be more and more common... and, quite frankly, they are beginning to get on my nerves.

What many of ya'll don't seem to understand (don't care to understand?)... is that, in America at least, everything is warehouse style.

Ie., instead of grouping by age like we used to do... we group by size.

My fiancée is 4ft something (my memory is acting up again)... and she still has to shop in the 'kids' sizes.

Should she not have the right to look 'sexy' if she chooses, just because of her small size?

Just because something is 'inappropriate' for someone so young... does not mean it's inappropriate altogether.

Many of you ladies here fall under the group called 'plus size'.

Should you not have the right to feel sexy just because you're bigger than manufacturers care to market too?

Ya'll need to keep in mind that your preconceived prejudices don't always align with reality.

Just because a piece of clothing is small... does not mean it was meant for your pre-teen.

I, however, will note that there is a disturbing trend amoung parents to 'sexify' their children... but this is a result of too many generations who grew up watching the 'idiot box'.


ETA: Nishu's quote, for the reference, was chosen because it highlights my points about size and age.




I have to admit... I didn't even know what a 'halter top' was.
I actually had to go look it up on google.

The versions in pictures I saw... look like they'd be more suited to formal occasions.

As far as functionality goes... I don't see much difference between those and an ordinary tank-top... and many kids (boys and girls) wear those. On a hot summer day... I could easily see something like that being desirable over the standard t-shirt... if for no other reason than to keep from getting heat stroke.

The other thing to consider... is that most kids don't tend to have 'inhibitions'. If it's hot... the clothes are coming off (at least... until 'that' age). I'd rather see a girl with a halter on... than no shirt at all... which is more likely if she was wearing an ordinary t-shirt.

Just my

Jason

Sorry, I guess we can agree to disagree. My mind set is that it's my job to protect my daughter from creeps. Plain and simple. We live in Florida and are often at the beach/pool. We wear coverups. I want my daughter to know she is beautiful, but there is no reason to show off her body to a sexual predator. At the age of nearly four, she knows better than to go running around outside in her bottoms only, and yes, maybe it shouldn't have to be a discussion, but I don't know our neighbors anymore. I personally, do not feel comfortable with my daughter running around half dressed, knowing that there could be someone who is having innappropriate thoughts about her.

And, at the age of four, she knows better than to just take her top off, if we're somewhere. We are outside all the time, mainly in tshirts *occasionally tanks* and not once has she taken off her tshirt because she was hot. She asks for a drink of water.

[cab54]

I guess I'm lucky to have had boys (although neither of my boys ever wanted to wear the popular pants-dropped-below-the-butt trend).

I would say it's supply and demand. If you all aren't buying them (the lewd clothing for children), they'll eventually stop making/selling them. Unfortunately, some goofy mom will buy them for their kid, so the demand goes on.

And JASON----what makes you think most of us are plus size here? Hmmm?

[nvmommyx6]

My 12 year old daughter and I were standing in line at walmart a few months back and she picked up a "teen" magazine and was thumbing through it while waiting.
She kept getting these grossed out looks on her face so I asked her, " whats wrong" she said, " LOOK AT THIS" and showed me a girl who was probably 10-12 years old dressed like a whore ( in my opinion!) and I said, "ok"
her reply was this, " Mom, that is gross, she looks like a slut" !!!!!
Thank god I have taught my children to respect their bodies and not dress like that!!!

[imagine]

I think it's "cute" for parents to want to put their kids into things that they feel look ideal for the age. You have to remember, though, that when your kids get to be the age where clothing is everything then some kids can be pretty cruel. They will mock the living crap out of a kid because they're wearing something that isn't "with the times". If you want to dress your kids like the Duggars, chances are that kids are going to endure alot of psychological abuse from other kids their age. I was pretty ridiculed as a kid because I was dressed in pants and t-shirts that my parents felt were appropriate for my age, and this was back before the whole "trashy" clothing trend started.

I'm sorry you were mocked and picked on for what you wore as a child.

Your story did get me thinking about what is cool and trends. It started me talking to the mom's of older children ( teenagers) and how they handle this.

Thank you for comments as they started a converastion with other local mommies. Thanks for letting us think and discuss

We decided what is cool and will keep you from being teased is set at the local level based on local culture with all its religious views and school rules.

My daughter would probably be picked on more for spaghetti straps at school (even in 100 degree weather) than dressing Duggar style. I know she would get a dress code violation for spaghetti straps( 3 violations and they talk with the parents about IF your child can still attend the public school)
Our area is very conservative and it is reflected in the way people dress. Children here are use to seeing people dress certain ways based on religion (Muslims, Conservative Mennonites, Conservative Christians etc) and would not think about making fun of someone because of that kind of dress. In fact they would get in trouble most likely from school and home if they did.

I asked the moms of the older girls and boys how they handle the coolness factor. Most said they set the ground rules based on dress code, religious dress codes, and what our local culture says is appropriate and lets the kids (teenagers) dress as they wish as long as all guidelines are met.

Hopefully all parents are able to balance what is required and appropriate with letting the children express themselves and not be teased.

[djbout]

I'm posting a link to my home towns local forum, there was an excellent thread on young girls clothing. Now I am far from conservative but the OP in this thread brings up that padded bra's are available for toddlers and that I think is outrageous!

http://forums.castanet.net/viewtopic.php?f=31&t=15330

[pop goes the weasel]

I think the point is that now anymore you see teenagers with "stuff" hanging out that has no business hanging out in the first place. A kids ( or anyone elses for that matter) butt crack is not a desirable picture when they are bent down and neither is under wear sticking out. some of the shirts are so low cut that you can see everything. These are teenagers not adults. Adults can buy where and what they want but there has to be some kind of guidance with teenagers. They are very impressionable by their peers that dress and act a certain way. We are going through this as I type.

[MoonMommy]

My concern is that we are dressing preteen, and younger girls as if they are sexual creatures. Low rise jeans, belly showing shirts (that even bothers me about Dora the Explorer), fancy "heal" shoes, etc. There is a time when girls become more womanly. Can't we as parents wait until then to dress them or allow them to dress as sexual creatures? I saw a girl at my son's school a few weeks ago with her t-shirt tied tight in a knot behind her back. The first thing that entered my mind is that I FIRST saw that look YEARS ago at a Hooters. The women who worked at the Hooters would tie their shirts in back so the shirt was tighter and showed more cleavage. Thus...hoping to get more tips. And, here was a girl who was MAYBE 3rd grade with the same look.

[imagine]

http://http://www.apa.org/pi/wpo/sexualization.html

Here's an excellent series of articles published by the American Psychological Association on the sexualization of girls, its consequences, and tips for parents.

I couldn't get the link to work
lets try this one

http://www.apa.org/pi/wpo/sexualization.html

[imagine]

I'm posting a link to my home towns local forum, there was an excellent thread on young girls clothing. Now I am far from conservative but the OP in this thread brings up that padded bra's are available for toddlers and that I think is outrageous!

http://forums.castanet.net/viewtopic.php?f=31&t=15330

There really are padded bras for toddlers? I've seen them in the girl section next to the non padded ones.

My almost 8 year old wants a bra. I told her that undershirts were bras for her age. She seemed fine with it for now. Apparently some girls in her second grade class are required to wear a bra by their mothers.