Do you have a life passion?

[Denvergirlie]

Do you have a life passion?

If you didn't have to "do" anything tomorrow or for all the days after tomorrow and just had to live what would you do?

Do you have something that you are passionate about in life? A hobby an interest, a cause?

What would you do with your life if money were not a consideration?
If you were given 20 million dollars and never had to worry about work or bills or anything of the sort what would you do with the rest of your life?

I don't have an answer to this myself and I find it very depressing. I have things I enjoy, but I don't really have passion for anything.

I'm still trying to figure out what I want to be when I grow up... I'm now 36 and still don't have an answer to this. This is beyond depressing for me.

My partner has been asking me this question for years now, and my response is still "I don't know". It's almost become an issue for us and our relationship.

I took 5 months off from work in my mid 20's. I read a lot (a lot, a lot), slept in, organized and paired back on things, hung out with friends, drank coffee and talked a lot. After 4 months I was bored, bored, bored, so I took a job waiting tables just to have something to do. I didn't need the money, it was just out of shear boredom.
I didn't stay with that job long, left and when back into my niche industry and I've been here for another 10 years now. I am not passionate about my work. For the most part enjoy it, enjoy and for the most part respect the people I work with, it brings in a solid income, but I don't have much of a life outside of it.
I do not want this job to be what defines me as a person. It's not a "legacy" that I would be proud of at the end of my life. For all practical purposes it's just a job.

I've read so many books about finding a life passion, do what you love and the money will follow, etc, etc. Well they all start with finding out what it is that you are passionate about... that's my problem, I don't know what it is I might be passionate about.

I've looked at joining local groups, volunteering, starting a new hobby, but when it gets down to it, I really don't have any interest in doing those things. I apparently am a boring person and it stinks big time.

Things I do enjoy... hot chocolate, good food, camping, hiking, thirft store hunting, growing a garden, flowers, a good book and learning new things and more. But I don't know that I would want to do any of these things as a job and after a few months I would be bored if that's all I had to do with my life.

So my question is, have you found a life passion? How did you discover it? It need not be something you do to earn a living, but if you could earn a living from it would you be estatic about that? Is there something you want to do everyday when you get out of bed? What is your driving passion?

Any advice or comiseration on this or am I all alone on this issue?

[Early Bird]

Well, the children give me a passion for life: to raise them to follow our morals and values; to raise them to be healthy; to guide them to become responsible adults.

My own personal passions? Well, if unlimited time and money, I'd explore a lot of personal-fulfillment avenues: knitting; reading; writing; gardening. I'd maybe go back to school -- and get a doctorate. I'd travel.

If still more time/money after those, I'd look for a cause I truly believe in. Maybe through my church. And then I'd devote time/talent/treasure to that avenue of making the world better.

I guess it's selfish that I'd go for personal fulfillment before making the world a better place. But I feel the lack of time for the fun stuff in my life; I think I'd need to get some of that out before getting immersed in another passion.

[groundhog]

dont feel bad i am 63 and dont know what i want to do when i grow up and im thinking i better figure it out soon lol

[pollypurebred39]

Well, I would most likely do all those things I can't now.

Like:

I'd first hire household/garden/childcare/tutoring/cooking/errand runner help so I could be a really good wife and mother. Devoting more time and energy towards the things that my family really wants, family time.

Then I'd
Spend more time with charity work, love to be able to do that without worrying about the wash, the cleaning, the cooking, the schoolwork, ect.
decorate/repair my home
spend time at the gym
spend sometime doing feel good, take care of myself things at the spa
plan family vacations/outings

[mommy4ever]

I'm turning 36, and I still don't know what i want to be when I grow up.

There are things I'd like to do, but I don't know that there's anything I'm truly passionate about.

I love my kids, I've been home for 13 years. I provide childcare. I don't mind it, it's a stable income, but not something I want to do forever.

I think I'd want to have my own business. BUt i find I lack commitment, so maybe I don't? Or maybe my life is too chaotic to make it work right now. Perhaps in a couple years, i'll take a part time job and work on my business. I don't know.

Dh has no issue with me staying home. He likes having everything from bills to food and laundry cared for. He's pretty spoiled. If we could afford it, he wouldn't care if I didn't do anything, but be home. But I know I'd be bored.

[Avery'sMom]

First I would take care of college for my child. Then, I'd give DH whatever money he needed to start up his media business. I'd adopt as many kids as I could. I'd hire someone to do the dreg work so that I could spend quality time with my family instead of dusting, vacuuming...ect.

I'd set up a scholarship program in our deceased daughter Tessa's name. I'd send a butt load of money to Grace and Hope in Guilin China. This would be in Avery's name because they saved her life and enabled us to be a family....

Then....I'd paint...

My life passion is family....children....and art.

[LucyOctopus]

My life passion is writing. It's what sustained me growing up, and it's what got me into an amazing college I wouldn't otherwise have gotten into. My writing time has plummeted since I began working. I want to return to my former self, but it's hard when I am so worn out from a long daily commute and workday.

With $20M, I would take care of the tuition of every child and retirement and mortgage for every adult in my family, especially that of my parents. I would also send them around the world, and buy them a car when they returned. I would buy property in NYC, DC, and Hawaii and rent them out. If I had any money left, I would buy my SO a Tesla, and an English bulldog for myself. I would write and try to get published, garden, cook, and travel.

I would never want to earn a living writing (journalism, editing, grant writing, etc) because it would exhaust me and turn me off from writing for pleasure. So I understand where you're coming from. I don't know what I want to do career-wise either. I'm set if I want to go to law school or grad school, but I don't know how to make the right decision. We'll see... we're young.

[rowdy35]

feed the poor, help the homeless

[ml2620]

Denvergirlie - We are about the same age and I am going through the same thing as well. I've been thinking about sitting down and writing an essay called "Who I want to be" (notice I didn't say What I want to be).

If, at 25 you told me I'd be married without children and working full time with no end of work in sight, I'd never believe you. I fully expected to married, stay home and raise 3 kids. Funny thing though...none of that has happened, and most of it never WILL, and I'm OK with that and a little fascinated about how I've managed to arrive here.

I don't have any advice or anything, but I am struggling with it as well and I think it's common. Not entirely related, but a few years ago when we were dating I asked my husband what he was most proud of. I already had my answer formulated - I was proud of getting my master's degree and owning my own home. And then he said "I think I'm a good friend." and then went on to detail the things he enjoyed most in his friendships - getting that call when a friend needs him, being able to give a friend a place to stay if they needed it, long talks, camping, hiking, tennis and just hanging out with friends - and I felt like crap, I had the wrong perspective, I was going with the concrete hoops I had jumped through and he was focused on more personal strengths. Maybe your partner does as well. You haven't been a vegetable over the years, you've managed to acquire and maintain a partnership - perhaps you should celebrate your personal qualities and not "what you do."

There was an etiquette column in the paper today about dealing with the etiquette of layoffs. She suggested we do away with the ice breaker "so, what do you do for a living?" to something else. I have to say I agree.

You know what I am trying to say here? I feel like I took too many words to say nothing!

[Denvergirlie]

You know what I am trying to say here? I feel like I took too many words to say nothing!

Yeah, that's extactly what I mean, I totally understand.

The $20 million was to say what would you spend it on, sure I would travel, buy land, give away, etc, etc. But during the other time when one is home from all that travel what would you bounce out of bed in the morning and say "I'm thrilled I get to do "x" today" because I don't have to worry about earning money.

I would be okay with working a "job" for the time being, if I had some other passion outside of it. Something I was thrilled to do. Maybe it's volunteer work for some, others its creating art or writing or just hanging out with family.

Kids, sure very important, but there is a line for me at least of living life for myself and not just for others or kids or whatever. When the kids leave home, what will still be "me". I see others that just kinda fall apart when the kids no longer "need" them, because that is how they have defined themselves for so long.

I just feel somewhat without direction and almost a sense of not havign a purpose as I feel this lack of passion in the things I am involved in.

Perhaps it's just the rainy and cloudy day today that has me questioning this more.

[ml2620]

And it's not OK to jump out of bed and thrilled to be a partner, a friend - or even just someone who notices how the sun passes over the sky, how steam condenses on your coffee mug, how strange and wonderful Flannery O'Connor is?

BTW, you are reminding me of my friend Jen, who is also in Colorado, who also refers to her spouse as a partner, and who is also dealing with the same issues.

[frugal.lass]

Denvergirlie,

I know how you're feeling. My full-time job is a generally fun but not-so-fulfilling one. When things go wrong (medical emergencies, safety issues on board, etc) I have to be on my game but most of the time, I could do my job in my sleep, blindfolded and with my hands tied behind my back (not literally...makes serving the drinks a bit tricky!! lol). My family and friends remember the highly-involved, ambitious but stressed person I used to be and ask what I'm going to work towards...and now I point out that I don't need to "work towards" anything. I pay my bills, I have food, I do things I like, I'm happy with my life. If I decide to do something, I do it because *I* want to not because those around me expect me to "be" something or "do" something important. I realized that I don't need to live for other people's expectations. Even having/not having a passion relates to that...are you disappointed that you can't find a passion because you WANT to be passionate about something or are you disappointed that you can't find a passion because everybody expects you to have one and thinks its a key part of life?

If someone is passionate about something, that's great but it's NOT bad to not have something you want to dedicate your life to. As long as your responsibilities are taken care of (ie, children, bills, pets), don't worry about measuring up to the yardsticks created by "experts", friends and family. Just be sure that when you ask questions of yourself, they are YOUR questions and not the ones put in your head by others.

I have NO idea if any of what I've written makes sense to other people so...please don't flame me if its unclear.

[VanVivCam]

I have ALWAYS wanted to purchase a big farm and farm house with a barn. Adopt or foster SEVERAL needing children and give them a wonderful life in a loving/busy/fun house. I would want to have couple of workers to help me around the house and on the farm because I want us to grow most of our crops and have several heads of cattle, chicken, goats, buffalo, etc. I want to have enough land that we have a couple of ponds for fishing and enough to be able to ride four wheelers, go-carts, dirt bikes, horses and bicycles. I want to teach the children to enjoy God's creations and know that they are loved and will never be alone. I want to be able to sew, knit, cook and just hang out with all my children.

That is my life long dream...I don't think it will ever happen, but I sure can dream!!!

[hoosiermama08]

I think 'life passions' do happen, but I also think that 'current obsession' suits many folks more.

While I love life, I'm one that revels and celebrates the details that make up life--and often that is enough for me--I do have obsessions/projects ...both creative and physical.

For example, my hooligans , now teens, are my life's passion...our family. I spend my days with them, yes, but I also get totally wrapped up in 'my current obsessions' such as photography for hours/days upon end...then I spend hours/days in my head with music and my guitar, or a short story I'm writing, a book I'm reading, bread I'm baking...

When my hooligans were small, my obsessions were lighter...to fit the busyness of mothering...I still read books but twere lighter, easier fare lol...getting out for a walk was high on my list...etc...

All of that to say, while I know many folks are searching for a life's passion, I believe the joy is also in the smaller things...if a big ol' passion hits you and brings you joy, WONDERFUL! If it's the smaller things, current obsessions n the like--WONDERFUL!

~~

[Jeanna]

I would own a large organic farm. I would raise veggies, fruits, herbs, grass fed animals, the works. Then since money would not be a worry I would try to give at least half of everything I grow to those less fortunate.