Checking in!!

[nvmommyx6]

Just wanted to drop in and say HI!!!!
Things are going well, still no job yet but had a few awesome interviews!
the old man had a appifany (sp) 8 days after I left, and has come to some realizations you'd never believe!
I am still in my own place, and plan to be there for at least a year! He is going to counseling and his exact words were, " I've been an A$$hole for 40 years now and it hasgotten meno where! Now it is time for me to change who I am for everyones sakes!"
So, we'll see. he's going to church with me on sunday's, he is going to counseling with his kids!

But I'm keeping my distance and for the moment enjoying his "new attitude" and enjoying my freedom!!
I'm at his house online, still no internet at my house because AT&T is retarded!!
Talkto you all soon, HUGS and I miss you all!!!

[Debbie-cat]

Glad to hear you are okay. I was beginning to worry about you! I think it is a good idea to be on your own and try to work things out otherwise it could very easily go back to the way it was. Good luck and I am glad to hear from you! Missing you!!!

[cab54]

A couple of days ago, I sat here in front of my laptop and said "I hope QuarterPounder is OK." Glad to hear from you!

Sounds like the 'old man' has seen some of the error of his ways. You are SMART, though, to keep your distance for a long while. For your kids' sake, if not your own.

Good luck on the interviews and job search. I will be praying you get one. That way, your options for life are your own.

[savvy_sniper]

You are smart to keep your distance. It is a good that he is in counseling, but if you take him back NOW he will most likely stop counseling and go right back to his old ways.

TIME will tell if he means it and whether he will stick with the counseling.

Take care of yourself and your kids FIRST AND FOREMOST!

[craftypam]

CJ

Very smart to keep your distance. 40 year old habits take a long time to break. He is talking the talk wait to see if he can walk the walk Praying you get a job very soon.

Pam

[Michelle68]

I'm glad you're okay. It's smart to wait and see what happens as far as his epiphany goes. Stand your ground and see if he'll really change.

[frugalwarrior]

Glad to see your o.k. Hate to be cynical but once a manipulator always a manipulator? Counceling may help but some people have learned what people want to hear.KWIM.

[nvmommyx6]

I know exactly what your all saying, and I hear it here too, the, " a leopard can't change his spots....he is just doing what he has to in order to get you back"!!!

This is why I'm keeping my distance, and keeping my own place! This way if he is full of $hit I can walk away without a problem and if he's not, thats awesome too!

Thanks you all for your kind and supportive words, I appriciate them more than you know! And please keep those prayers coming for a job for me, unemployment only lasts for so long!!!

(((HUGS)))
C.J.

[i.m.cheap]

Please be very cautious about his promises to change. I went back to my abuser twice before I finally made it out for good. The last time I left was after he blacked my eye and tried to choke me to death with both hands around my throat. Even after I left that time and moved out of state, he still stalked me, and tried to woo me back, telling me he had changed. Don't believe this cr*p.

[rowdy35]

i agree with the consensus of opinion to please "be careful" for your own safety.

good luck on getting a new job soon !

If this man has been abusive in the past, I would really stay away from him and discontinue contact but it's your call and I wish you the best.

[Momto2Boyz]

I'm so glad you are doing well, CJ! I think it sounds like you have a really good plan in place, just stick to your guns and see what comes your way!

As far as him changing... I've seen it happen, so I honestly do believe that if people want to, they can change. My Dad was a jerk me entire life to everyone, us kids, my mom, etc. He was never physically abusive, but he borderlined on verbal abuse on occassion and was just an all around jerk to the point no one ever wanted to be around him.

So anyhoo, somewhere over the last 5 years, he made an amazing transformation. (My mom threatened to leave once, packed her car and was really ready to go...I think that was his turning point). He found help for his "anger" issues and found counseling, and has made a complete 180 turn, and is now a joy to be around. So it can happen!


Although, my mom loves his new "happy" attitude, sometimes it drives her nuts becuase he just doesn't get mad anymore. He doesn't fight, he doesn't yell, he is calm and collected when they have a disagreement, which I think throws my mom off, since they had fallen into a routine of arguing and letting off steam over the last 30 years. So be ready for your relationship to change, and as odd as it sounds, you may have to make some adjustments to it that you didn't think you would!

[gapeach]

Glad to hear you're doing well. Good luck with everything. Keeping you in my prayers

[Ceashels]

Glad to hear you are doing well and keeping a safe and mindful distance in this relationship. You will grow so much on your own and I commend your intelligence and spirit in doing what is right for you. Like others have said, manipulators are always manipulators and once in a while there really is a change of their heart. Be careful and good luck.