Grrr my boss makes me so mad! VERY Long vent!!!!

**nodmicks** · 07-11-2009, 10:37 AM

I have degenerating disks and am very proactive about it trying to stave of surgery. I have done lots of chiro, yoga, inversion therapy, acupuncture, physical therapy, core building etc. Everyone knows this as I have been dealing with it for years. Two surgeons have told me a need a spinal fusion years ago but I have tried as long as possible to not do it as it scares me to death.

I have had a really bad flare up this last week. I have done everything I can do. Rest, 3 chiro trips, pain meds etc. The chiro told me this week it is looking like it is time to go back to the surgeon to have an mri ordered. The boss knows this.

This week I work Thur, Fri , Sat so I was happy to have the begining of the week to stay off my feet. I absolutely am in agony in a sitting position. The spasms were so bad on my 30 mile commute yesterday and Thur that I feared crashing while driving. I was grateful for slower days at work those two days so I could move all my clients closer together and shorten the time I had to stand.

It was ridiculous for me to even be there. However I didn't want to disappoint my clients as I'm on vacation next week.I had to stop constantly and hold the back of the styling chair while doing clients every few minutes until the spasms past for a few more minutes. I took me ages to walk the 10 feet from my styling chair to the desk to check out clients as the spasms were so bad. By the end of the day I had tears in my eyes constantly from the pain while still trying to act as normal as humanly possible. I was miserable.

The girls working were as helpful as they could be but they were busy too. I worked with all the staff but the boss Thur and Fri. Of course not staying off my feet Thur and Fri made it so much worse. Today is awful. I am more crooked than ever, can't stand upright, needed help to use the bathroom from Dh. No way I can go stand on my feet again.

I called one of the other staff that is off today first. Because I had two clients that are not mine. She was more than happy to go do them for me. The other clients are die hard regulars that won't let anyone else do their hair. I contacted my clients and told them as long as I can stand I will try to come in on my vacation next week to do them. They were a ok and so kind saying no biggie they could wait until I was back from vacation and they hoped I felt better. I have very nice clients.

Sounds all taken care of right? When I called my boss today and told her I was really sorry but I could barely stand and was not coming in she was really mad! The things she said were very rude. Unbelievably rude! As in I am tempted to never go back rude.

In 14 years I have called in :

~ for being sick as a dog with pneumonia

~ once because my kids were sick (grandma came and stayed with them all the other times over the last 14 years)

~14 YEARS AGO right after I started there I ruptured the 3 disks and was off for 8 weeks. (YES THIS WAS A BIGGIE AS FAR AS TIME OFF~ boss said" please don't worry about the time off" as I was horrified as I just started there

~Last summer I had a really bad flare up and was mostly bed ridden for two weeks (so I missed 5 days total since I work PT).

~ missed today!

I totally understand that with the back thing I have missed some work over the last 14 years. However I going to declare myself 1 darn dependable employee over the last 14 years. I've never been late, do my personal apponintments around work etc so I'm not leaving , work lots of my weekends or days off to accommodate my clients special events. I'm supposed to work every other weekend. I worked 8 weekends in a row recently because of clients special events. So you can imagine how mad I was when my boss went off on me about NOT BEING DEPENDABLE when I called her today!!!

We have staff that misses work ON A WEEKLY basis , takes whole days off for a dr appt , hangovers, because their 16 year old has the flu, driving a friend to the airport etc and never a word is said because they are not booked a lot or busy so no $ lost. But being dependable and not able to walk gets me a butt chewing even though the other staff told her over the last few days when she came in how it was painful to even watch me try to move and I should not be there.
It obviously doesn't pay to be dependable!

Lets just say I am furious and a little hurt!!!! After 14 years I thought we had a better relationship and I sure didn't expect to be treated like that. Dh told me I should let her have it with both barrels and take myself else where. I had 1 other blow up with her a long , long time ago when I had a sick kid and really debated it back then and he said the same then. I love how men want to fix things. LOL

I felt bad enough letting my clients down today. It was embarrassing enough needing help to get to the potty! I did not need the bosses crap talk!

There is really no point to this post. I'm honestly just venting. Thanks for letting me ramble! I feel better just for getting it out.

**Cricketlegs** · 07-11-2009, 11:07 AM

I am sorry this is happening to you. People like your boss make me

!

**nodmicks** · 07-11-2009, 11:12 AM

Thanks Cricketlegs and you other nice people that clicked the hug button. I'm not fuming mad anymore but I do feel pretty sad about it.

**Cricketlegs** · 07-11-2009, 11:18 AM

Your boss depends on you because she knows she can and because of the ones that she can't depend on she looks to you to take up all the slack.

It happens all the time the harder you work and the better you are the worse they sock it to you because someone has to do it right????

sigh......

**nodmicks** · 07-11-2009, 11:26 AM

Originally Posted by Cricketlegs

Your boss depends on you because she knows she can and because of the ones that she can't depend on she looks to you to take up all the slack.

It happens all the time the harder you work and the better you are the worse they sock it to you because someone has to do it right????

sigh......

You are right on I think. Now I need to seriously contemplate if I'm going to stay employed there or blow it off again. It is pretty easy as a stylist to go a mile down the road and take my clients with me. I did that when I went to that shop 14 years ago.

Dh tells me just to stay home as it would be much easier on my body. Ummm no because I love working with my clients, I like the $ and after him being laid off last fall I want to keep my pt job in case things go wrong again.

I was just so shocked at what came out of her mouth!

**Michelle68** · 07-11-2009, 12:27 PM

That was pretty unkind of her, especially when you are feeling so terrible. I don't blame you for being upset, I would be, too. I hope you start feeling better soon. Please get some rest and take care of yourself.

**nodmicks** · 07-11-2009, 01:08 PM

Thanks Michelle! I am sure resting and praying I will be able to move by next thur as we have 4 day music festival tickets. If not dh and the kids can go and we will donate my ticket

**Debbie-cat** · 07-11-2009, 01:21 PM

So sorry you have a crappy boss. She probably depends on you the most because you are reliable but it doesn't give her the right to say the things she has said. You would think she would realize that if you leave you will be taking your clients with you and she in the process will lose money and clientele! With the economy the way it is, you would think that she would want all the regulars that she could get. Hugs.

**nodmicks** · 07-11-2009, 01:36 PM

Thanks Debbie I guess she just isn't always logical.

**jantana** · 07-11-2009, 02:03 PM

Take care, I hope you start feeling better. I would take time off and get to feeling better first. Your health needs to come first. I would let your boss know that if she wants you as an employee, then she needs to work with you and part of that is speaking to you like a human if not then do go on down the road. Maybe something else was wrong with your boss when you told her you weren't coming in and you were the one she took it out on. Good luck and be healed.

**frugalfranny** · 07-11-2009, 05:17 PM

Hope you are feeling better soon.

So sorry this happened and you have to put up with the 'flack' from your boss?

**calimomx2** · 07-11-2009, 05:28 PM

I hope you are feeling better soon! Your boss is awful......I'm so sorry you have to deal with that!

**gapeach** · 07-11-2009, 05:50 PM

My stylist had a similar situation. The shop owner rode her so hard because in the end she was her "cash cow". She moved to a shop about 1/4 mile away and all her clients did follow her. The previous shop is now up for sale as her business almost nil.

**nodmicks** · 07-11-2009, 08:08 PM

Thanks everyone for the kind words. I appreciate it!

Gapeach~ I see you know exactly how our business works. 14 years ago I moved 1 block with 3 other stylist for similar reasons. That was a hard blow to that shop. However if he had treated his employees better it wouldn't have happened.

I decided when I go back I'm going to have a very frank discussion with her. There are 5 shops withing 1/2 a mile (so no long drive for clients) that would be perfectly willing to take a good stylist with a booked schedule.