I'm going to spill my guts....(Long story)
Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 15 of 22
  1. #1
    Registered User brenda67's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    New York
    Age
    47
    Posts
    2,966
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Blog Entries
    1
    Rep Power
    20

    Default I'm going to spill my guts....(Long story)

    I'm (we) are in alot of debt again..I had almost all of our cc's paid for except for $4000.00 back in January out of $16,000 owed...we bought our "first home" last Oct "08 and it went all down hill so to speak..I went crazy and bought everything new for our "NEW" home..I wanted a "fresh start" and I wanted to be happy instead of sad like when I lived in our trailer for 10yrs (way to small for a family of 5 plus our big dog brandy) and most of the stuff we owned was old and ruined with 3 growing boys that went through their destructive stage..I had given up trying to keep things nice and neat (which I think really put me over the edge and into a very deep depression because I was brought up by a mother who was a clean freak as well as a very organized person ..our home was like a show piece..nothing was ever out of place..everything matched no matter/ beautiful what room you went into nor did anything ever looked like it wasn't new (my mom loved dark pine furniture so if anything did have a scratch or marked in anyway she just used old english polish and you would never know any different ) our livingroom set always a couch love seat and matching chair along with a rocking chair also always looked new..anyway my point is I was living out of my element..my trailer was dirty nasty mess..my used furniture was nasty/broken torn you name it.. and I just couldn't keep up with keeping everything clean between working 24 to 32 hrs plus other jobs on the side..my mil that was my babysitter let my boys do whatever they wanted..no you couldn't talk to her about making them behave/respect your belongings as well as everything else and sticking with it because her comment was "I might not live to see them growup" so basically just let them do whatever...I had to work so I had no choice..
    Fast forward we now have lot's of new stuff and it looks beautiful along with lots of new debt..But I absolutely love my house..I love to come home from work and walk through the door and see a beautiful new kitchen with all new shiny appliances..walk into my livingroom and see 2 big comfy couches ( everyone can actually sit on..the couch in the trailer could only seat 3 people and the rest of us had to sit on the floor) with beautiful end tables/ matching gorgeous sp? coffee table..not to mention it's clean...I'm finely happy..I feel like I'm in my element again..It doesn't bother me that we are in dept for several thousands....That sounds so weird to be writing this ..I feel like I'm free..My home is my" Domaine" and I want to live and be happy within my ownself as well as my family not living with a depressed Mom.. instead of holding on to every dime or and being miserable.. I/we are able to pay our bills with $1000.00 leftover for food & gas plus 3 months of savings in the bank...We paidoff our vehicles..so now we will start paying off the credit card dept again...But..I don't feel guilty!!! I say that because I started to feel guilty and was thinking everytime I logged onto FV that I don't belong here because I /we have alot of dept again..Like I did a really bad thing and my FV family will look down on me because I really don't feel guilty for accrueing sp? the new debt..This is why I'm posting this to get it off my chest..I feel so much better now!



    Thanks for reading my confession.....
    Wife to Keith
    Mom of 3 boys

  2. #2
    Registered User Bournecrazy's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Loughborough, England
    Age
    27
    Posts
    873
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Blog Entries
    95
    Rep Power
    9

    Default

    thanks for sharing, I too have just bought my first home and whacked everything on a CC for it so i know how you feel.

    Get the budget going and it will be paid off soon.

  3. #3
    Registered User mommy4ever's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Western Canada
    Posts
    3,238
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Blog Entries
    158
    Rep Power
    18

    Default

    Know what? You have money left over at the end of the month. Good for you! You don't say what you're doing for the debt repayment, hopefully it's more than the minimum and you have a plan to get rid of it by a set date.

    I don't know that it is worth beating yourself up over. Now that you have the home, which you love and will care for, you also have 3 months living expenses. You are in a good position overall, you just need to be focused on getting rid of the debt. Also plan a home maintenance budget, because, fact of life, something will need to be fixed eventually.

    Was it a good thing to go and spend all that money? Not the greatest thing, preplanning it would have been better to have the cash in hand, but it isn't the end of the world. Make a plan and stick to it!

    Enjoy your new home!!!
    Mom to 4 wonderful kiddos. Homeschooling mom
    • FFEF 2/6months
    • Retirement savings to start
    • Mortgage


    DEBT, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slave driver.
    - Ambrose Bierce






  4. #4
    Registered User nodmicks's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Posts
    6,885
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    38

    Default

    Brenda you paid it off before and have extra to pay it off again! Please don't ever think you don't belong because you sure do!

  5. #5
    Registered User brenda67's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    New York
    Age
    47
    Posts
    2,966
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Blog Entries
    1
    Rep Power
    20

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by mommy4ever View Post
    Know what? You have money left over at the end of the month. Good for you! You don't say what you're doing for the debt repayment, hopefully it's more than the minimum and you have a plan to get rid of it by a set date.

    I don't know that it is worth beating yourself up over. Now that you have the home, which you love and will care for, you also have 3 months living expenses. You are in a good position overall, you just need to be focused on getting rid of the debt. Also plan a home maintenance budget, because, fact of life, something will need to be fixed eventually.

    Was it a good thing to go and spend all that money? Not the greatest thing, preplanning it would have been better to have the cash in hand, but it isn't the end of the world. Make a plan and stick to it!

    Enjoy your new home!!!




    Thanks..we did have alot preplanned..however the $10,000 we had saved just didn't cut it! It takes alot of money to fix up a house that needed fresh paint/primer (about $700.00 worth) on every wall/ceiling.. a gutted kitchen that needed everything new including a floor..we needed to build a room (walls,electric run to the room ect..) for my oldest son.. my dh bought at least $4500 worth of tools to do all the work himself which saved us thousands of $$$..alot of new construction had to be done to move into to this house..think 6 months worth and that's with my Dh working 40 plus hours a week before we could even move in.. If we didn't need to fixup the house we would of spent that money on the things I mentioned and wouldn't have had much charged to the cc's...Thank god for a Dh that can do/fix just about anything or we would be in alot more debt then we have now..I'm not going to payoff anything until next year...right now I'm concentrating on stockpiling more food and saving any money we have leftover each month...Next year will be a fresh start to knocking out the dept.
    Wife to Keith
    Mom of 3 boys

  6. #6
    Registered User rsbs's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Posts
    277
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    8

    Default

    New houses are always expensive... that fresh start is one I'm guilty of making myself.
    It sounds like you haven't gotten yourself into trouble yet & what I would hope for you at this point is that you have (or make) a plan to repay what you can, as soon as you can... that down-hill road of debt generates speed when it is most damaging & we never know when that time will be.
    So, no condemnation here, but a word from one who has been where you are TWICE, please take care of yourself!

  7. #7
    Registered User miss_thrifty's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    canada
    Posts
    6,273
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    23

    Default

    Deffrently dont beat yourself up. we got a tv this spring on cc at future shop for$1500- and half was paid off right off the bat because of a samll windfall. But im not going to beat myself up over it. Hubby always wanted a 50"plasma tv. and we know before next spring we can afford to pay it off. But yes I dont have a EF and I admit it I should.
    But were all not perfect and as long as u can pay more then the minum on the CC and u always have money at the end of the mont and youir budget ist so tight its causing u major stress, thats good.
    Emotions play abig part on everyone and your past will too.
    I know all about past and with me its emotional eating. I take each day as it comes.
    HUGGGSSS to you and never feel that u cant be honest online hereand that were going to be negative to u.

  8. #8
    Registered User frugal is fun's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    Connecticut
    Posts
    924
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    11

    Default

    I just bought a house a month ago and I can totally relate to wanting a new start. I haven't charged anything that I can't pay off tomorrow but the money is running out. Its all about decisions and priorities, what you can live with and what you can live without.

    You did the right thing for you and your family at the time and you have learned so much from FV that you know that you are "okay".

    Congratulations and best wishes for you and your family in your new home!!
    Judy


    never loose site of the big picture

  9. #9
    Registered User forHISglory's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Right Here
    Age
    65
    Posts
    3,813
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Blog Entries
    11
    Rep Power
    36

    Default

    It sounds like you all are working a plan; it's just not the plan that many of think of as working! (does that make sense?) The bottom line is that you are not destitute, your mental outlook is brighter, and your family is enjoying your new home.

    My only advice would be to stay alert to your spending habits. Right now it seems as if you are handling the debt. But what would happen if you had another urge to spend?

    In the meantime, enjoy your home and your family, and keep sharing on FV!
    Spiritual:
    "You are fearfully and wonderfully made." Please... respect life.

    Financial:
    Debt free, hoping to stay that way!


    MY BLOG: glorybug.wordpress.com


    1. Keep on writing.
    2. Get some balance in my life.
    3. Lose weight. Hopefully 20# this year.
    4. Continue to be looking for how God wants to use me this year.


  10. #10
    Rude and Vile Master Greebo's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Baltimore, Maryland
    Age
    45
    Posts
    8,563
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    77

    Default

    I'm by no means going to condemn you for wanting to have a better lifestyle - but I will caution you to pay that debt off AS FAST AS YOU CAN because you never know when something might happen that will turn that surplus into a deficit...

    Glad you found a good home!
    If you could kick in the pants the person responsible for your problems, you wouldn't be able to sit for a month.

    Did you know that a 4 year student paying $20,000/year who finances their education graduates with over $103,000 in debt to start? But a student who works and pays cash and takes 6 years to graduate ends with $6,300 in their pocket! So much for "getting a head start by financing!"


    Greebo
    (Nerd Spender): Loving and extremely patiently tolerated husband of ceashels.
    WARNING: Y Chromosome behind the keyboard. Adjust your listening filters appropriately!

    Three
    Two mortgages, two one no car loans, one no credit cards, and a partridge in pear tree!

  11. #11
    Registered User Nana2two's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Heart of Illinois
    Age
    46
    Posts
    1,015
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    17

    Default

    Been there done that.Huggss

  12. #12
    Registered User frugalfriend's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    CO
    Posts
    2,576
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    19

    Default We love ya,

    Oops! Double post

  13. #13
    Registered User frugalfriend's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    CO
    Posts
    2,576
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    19

    Default We love ya, Brenda!

    Don't belong here, are you kidding me?! Don't ever feel that way! We all have decisions to make for our families, and no way is right or wrong, they may just be different. You will pay off the debt and you have a plan. I do agree with Greebo though, on getting it paid off ASAP because in life we never know what is coming around the corner.

    Enjoy your beautiful new home!! Post pics for us if you can!

  14. #14
    Registered User
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    U.S.
    Posts
    3,479
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Blog Entries
    56
    Rep Power
    28

    Default

    I think if you're not over your head (and $1,000 a month in savings says you probably aren't) then if you think you can manage your debt, that's what you do. What business is it of anyone elses'?

    There are people here with $1,000s in debt, like me, and there are folks here who paid it all off. I don't talk much about my debt here because it is against the "culture" here to be comfortable (or resigned at least) to your debt. We are slowly but surely working on it, and we need to please ourselves, not anyone else. Dave Ramsey does NOT audit my monthly checking account, and I wouldn't let him (or anyone else) if they wanted to.

    Your money, your home, your debt. It is only the business of those here if you share it. If you think your debt was worth what you got for it and you are comfortable with how you'll pay for it, that's all you need.

    My .02

    Judi

  15. #15
    pip
    pip is offline
    Registered User pip's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    U.S.A.
    Posts
    3,281
    Post Thanks / WTG / Hug
    Rep Power
    16

    Default

    (((Hugs)))
    Can we see some pictures?

Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. the best dh! long story =)
    By sahm2boys in forum Success Stories
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 10-12-2010, 08:11 AM
  2. My Very Own Ghost Story (long)
    By StartingOver in forum General Chat
    Replies: 27
    Last Post: 05-08-2010, 12:05 AM
  3. I feel very much alone today....((Long Story))
    By brenda67 in forum General Chat
    Replies: 22
    Last Post: 01-27-2009, 02:03 PM
  4. Long Story ( Can use Input )
    By Holly in forum Supplemental Income, Small Business
    Replies: 17
    Last Post: 04-22-2008, 04:12 PM

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •