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Thread: What would you do?
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09-11-2009, 03:17 PM #1Registered User
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What would you do?
So its my husbands weekend with our daughter. Normal this wouldn't be an issue, but she has swimming lessons and tutoring tomorrow morning, and he lives out of town almost an hour or so away. He did ask if he could just stay here for the night and I could go sleep upstairs at in my moms. But I don't know what to do. She said if social assistance found out he stayed the night here that they would take my assistance away. I can't lose my assistance, but I also know she is mad at him right now for the way he has treated me. I don't know what to do. What would you do?
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09-11-2009, 03:18 PM #2Rude and Vile Master
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Where is the nearest Motel 6?
If you could kick in the pants the person responsible for your problems, you wouldn't be able to sit for a month.
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09-11-2009, 03:20 PM #3Rude and Vile Master
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And in case that answer wasn't clear - that means "NO"
I assume that you meant to say "EX" husband? So the problems with him potentially staying under the same roof are more than just the risk of losing assistance.
Either he stays at a motel, you rearrange the schedule, or he drives an hour.
That'd be what I'd tell my sister if she were in your shoes. And if I had one.If you could kick in the pants the person responsible for your problems, you wouldn't be able to sit for a month.
Did you know that a 4 year student paying $20,000/year who finances their education graduates with over $103,000 in debt to start? But a student who works and pays cash and takes 6 years to graduate ends with $6,300 in their pocket! So much for "getting a head start by financing!"
Greebo(Nerd Spender): Loving and extremely patiently tolerated husband of ceashels.
WARNING: Y Chromosome behind the keyboard. Adjust your listening filters appropriately!
ThreeTwo mortgages,twooneno car loans,oneno credit cards, and a partridge in pear tree!
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09-11-2009, 03:52 PM #4Moderator
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He can pick her up after her activities tomorrow. Why would he need to spend the night if she's not even going to be available in the morning to spend time with him.
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09-11-2009, 04:00 PM #5Moderator
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~An hour away is no significant distance. He'll just have to get up early for the drive.
I wouldn't offer to have him pick her up after the activities either. If this weekend is his time to parent then he should be responsible for getting her to the activities.
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09-11-2009, 04:02 PM #6Registered User
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That sounds like the plan to me.
Originally Posted by monkeywrangler71
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09-11-2009, 04:30 PM #7Registered User
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No, no, no....sides..if you let him do it once it will become a habit for him to want to do it again and again and again...
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09-11-2009, 05:48 PM #8Registered User
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Offer your moms place and he will turn it down. Its not worth the risk.
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09-11-2009, 06:23 PM #9
an hour away is nothing.
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09-11-2009, 07:40 PM #10Registered User
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If parenting time is court ordered then it is his weekend no matter what activities your daughter has going on. If he is willing he can drive her to her activities in the morning, just as you would if it were your weekend. But, he really isn't under any obligation to give up his parenting time, for her activities....sucks but that's the way it is.
My dd & her hubby run into the same issue all the time for visitation concerning his 3...his ex has Saturday visits and to comply with the court order they don't make any extracurricular plans for his 3 children during their mom's visitation time."Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans." John Lennon
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09-11-2009, 09:36 PM #11Registered User
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Well maybe you need to tell his straight up front that you could lose assistance if he stays there. That he needs to find other accomodations, plain and simple. You lose if he stays, he wins if he does. NO WAY!
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