Greetings from Bruges

[Dutchie]

Just have a couple of minutes to say hi to everyone.
After coming back from New York 2 weeks ago, I started work and then had to get everything ready for our son's wedding.
The wedding was last Sat. (Sept. 12) and then we had to leave the next morning for this conference in Bruges (Belgium).
Bruges is a medieval town with (I think) literally thousands of gabled houses dating back to medieval times. It is really very beautiful.

Our first day here was Sunday and we were like zombies after the wedding which of course had some (normal??) drama.

DH's brother (and psycho wife) it seemed hadn't been invited after all and had announced that they wouldn't have come anyway. However the ex-wife HAD been invited as well as Dh's brother's older two sons and they all had a ball.
Our only niece 33 (and dh) had been invited but only her dh showed up which we found a little weird. Later on in the day we heard that they have split up after only 5 years of marriage. The cause of the break is heartbreaking (as far as I have heard that this is the cause) - they have been trying to have kids for all of the 5 years of their marriage
and the fault is with him (he has no good swimmers if you KWIM) but he refuses to get any treatment as far as it is possible OR adopt and she is desperate to have kids. Really sad!!!!

However the thing that really got to me and which will definitely have some repercussions is that during the 'line-up' when the bride and groom and both parents stand in a line and are congratulated by all the guests we were introduced to various 'friends and neighbors of the bride's parents'.
We found this quite weird since we had asked our son if our neighbors (1 couple) whom he has known for almost his entire life plus 1 couple who has known him since birth and who are our very best friends could come to the reception (not the whole day but just the reception) and he announced that not one of the neighbors/friends of the both parents would be asked.

We talked with these friends and neighbors of the bride's parents for a few minutes because we had seen a house for sale next door to them (when we went at the start of the wedding with the rest of the wedding party for lunch at the bride's parents) and we said to them well we really love the house that is for sale so maybe we will also become neighbors.
Our son denies that these people were there and that we must be mistaken but both my DH and myself are not stupid - so to say that we are annoyed doesn't even touch the surface.
Don't know how we are going to work this out.

However except for that part it was a beautiful day and as soon as I can I will post some photos.

I'll start posting 'normally' when I get back and am caught up.

So, Hi from Bruges!!!!!!

[monkeywrangler71]

Was the lineup at the church or the reception? Where I come from, people can (and do) come to the church and witness a wedding ceremony regardless of whether or not they were invited.

[Dutchie]

Was the lineup at the church or the reception? Where I come from, people can (and do) come to the church and witness a wedding ceremony regardless of whether or not they were invited.

This was the official line-up at the reception where you had to have an invitation to come.
We also have the custom that anyone can come to the church and witness a wedding ceremony.

[Siebrie]

From what I have experienced in NL, the reception is for non-invitees. It's regarded as an opportunity for everyone to congratulate the married couple, eat a slice of cake and drink a cup of coffee, discuss the ceremony and the bride's dress, and then leave. The dinner and party are by invitation only.

Maybe the friends/neighbours did not realize that the reception was restricted to invitees only. I, for one, would not have realized and would have joined the reception.

In the old times (10 years ago) couples would have either a reception for everyone or a dinner/party for friends and family. Nowadays, they tend to have both, with the understanding that everyone is invited to the reception, but only a certain group is invited to the dinner/party.

[lwlynch]

great to see you again.. i am back too, hopefully i catch up with all my friends

[Dutchie]

From what I have experienced in NL, the reception is for non-invitees. It's regarded as an opportunity for everyone to congratulate the married couple, eat a slice of cake and drink a cup of coffee, discuss the ceremony and the bride's dress, and then leave. The dinner and party are by invitation only.

Maybe the friends/neighbours did not realize that the reception was restricted to invitees only. I, for one, would not have realized and would have joined the reception.

In the old times (10 years ago) couples would have either a reception for everyone or a dinner/party for friends and family. Nowadays, they tend to have both, with the understanding that everyone is invited to the reception, but only a certain group is invited to the dinner/party.

There was one line-up to which anyone could come but the one in the evening (the one in question) was by invitation only.

[Sassyclass]

Glad to hear from you but you need a real vacation from everything from the sound of it. I know you just came back from NY but maybe you can tell everyone you are going away but stay home and just not answer the phone or door? At least psycho didn't show.

Cat