Been absent for awhile, lurking here and there-

**patra** · 10-07-2009, 01:10 PM

Hello folks!

I haven't been actively posting of late but have been popping in to check articles and other things.I hope some of you will remember me,I have two children Kira 5 and Gabe 2& 1/2.I am married twelve years to my husband Joe who is a painter /handyman.I do not work, am a SAHM.

I am doing well ,I suffer from schizo affective disorder,it is under control and does not rule me the way it used to.I found a great doc and my medicine is optimal right now.

I worked for a year as a waitress while my husband was home on disability for almost three years,the rest of the time I was having my children and working retail, to try to make ends meet.We were on WIC for awhile, now I am applying for SSI,it has been quite a struggle.I try to be frugal but think I need an overhaul because I have been wasteful,and compulsive.

I am a martial artist, now am doing Hung Ga, and also am a yoga enthusiast.I hope someday to share the knowledge I've learned and continue to learn by teaching.I used to teach children Kenpo and adults Kickboxing.

I am learning to accept what I can't change,and to try to make better that which i can("lord grant me the serenity.....").I am nearing forty, will be 38 in january,a therapist told me life begins at forty, I shall find out.

I don't want to make this too long,so will start to wrap it up.We have been living ten years with my dad, my mom passed in october 07.We cannot afford to move out /buy a house, are having trouble making our bills.we have no credit cards or CC debt.We have a car payment we can't seem to make on time.we have 5000 in medical bills.I have a couple athletic bills that I have contested and have to pay(roughly 900$).we have gotten a handle on the mountain of debt we incurred and now owe24,000 in car/medical/gym stuff....I blame myself for the debt because all but the car is on me.(car is well, we needed it ,the gym is a waste, and the medical is all me too...)so I have a lot of feelings of guilt and am often feeling shame for spending especially when i spend on myself or am frivolously buying lotto tickets(I KNOW! a cardinal sin!!)...but I am back here at FV hoping to learn some techniques and tips for curbing the spendthrift, and save what I can.

thanks -
Patty