Can i get YOUR opinion on this

**sahm2boys** · 11-15-2009, 12:37 PM

alrighty!

I had to change babysitters back in 2008 i was working i had just got promoted and the orginial babysitters mother died and of course she needed time..so i took a day, my husband took a day and i took another to stay home with kids and then the orginial babysitter needed another week...i understood but work would not so i had to find someone new.

i found another lady nice. clean bright home and we got along well but the price doubled and i had to sign a contract so i then had to call the babysitter that kept the kids since 6 weeks old that they wouldnt be coming back. well i lost my job and i kinda of told the babysitter i was scared of a lay off an soon after that it happened...her contract stated a 2 week notice with pay..yet i could not use her on my taxes because she didnt pay taxes i also had to pay for days they werent there...which maybe if i got to collect back on my taxes i wouldnt have minded so much but i didnt and i had never had to pay someone for my days off..

well i paid her and hadnt used her since

i went out with my mother on the 6th of november and asked the newer babysitter to watch the boys..she wanted 35 for the day...ok I personally thought that was high and she commented that she went up...i wasnt thrilled but my mom convinced me i said ok..the same day my FIL passed away and i asked her to watch the boys on tuesday and could i pay her on fri? she said ok... well the kids were only there an hour and i asked her how much she said just 20..i was really surprised...20 for an hour but 35 for the day? well it was a rough morning and i had more to do so i said alright and left...well she texted me for the money and i asked could we neg. on that price...that i understood 35 for the day, but they werent there no time..didnt even change a diaper and that i wasnt trying to be differcult but she knew only my husband is working and we have all these funeral cost now could we do 10-15..nope..no one has ever complained about the cost blah blah she hit hard times to..mind you when i dropped the kids off she had 8 others there, at 200 a week with no taxes..and its her daughters home she doesnt pay all the bills. i should have discussed that with her earlier. so i just said fine my husband will drop it off in the morning and we wont be using her services any longer because we couldnt afford them..now my husband and sil are on my side..LOL silly i know but my mom and Best friend is like dont burn bridges

what do you think

considering i paid 2 weeks when i left there without her watching the kids..she coudlnt work with me a little? also if she charged 10 per kid an hr she would be making more then me..if i only was paid 12 an hr and she wants 20.00??

**WV_mom_of2** · 11-15-2009, 12:54 PM

I used to do in home daycare and I have to side with her. If you knew she paid no taxes and if you signed a contract saying you'd give her two weeks notice with pay, then it's a contract and you should honor it with no fussing. People who always change their minds and the rules are why she has a contract in the first place. I ran into this all the time. Moms would agree on a price and a pay day. Then they would argue they didn't owe me that much, "forget" that they got paid and needed to pay me, "forget" that they took a day off and not show up for my day and not call and then not want to pay me because I didn't watch the kids, etc. You have to remember, this is her JOB. You wouldn't expect to work and not get paid or for your job to not honor a contract with you. How would you feel if you had a job with an agreed upon pay rate and then after you worked your boss tried to negotiate with you on your pay? And you have to remember(if I read your post right) that you have asked her to take your kids these last couple of days with very short notice.

Babysitting is a very HARD job and in my opinion it's one of the most important things someone can do for you. I didn't get the feeling that she was a bad sitter or that you had any problems with her other than the paying thing. You should pay her what was agreed upon. Then if her price is too high for you don't use her again.

**shoiji** · 11-15-2009, 02:22 PM

While I realize a contract is a contract I do have to question on the not paying taxes part. It just seems that a home babysitting service would be considered a business and should pay taxes. So does she have a license, or does the state not require it.

For those types of prices I would want to know that everything is on the up and up. Personally I would start asking around again for a new babysitter.

**Peaches** · 11-15-2009, 02:31 PM

Originally Posted by shoiji

While I realize a contract is a contract I do have to question on the not paying taxes part. It just seems that a home babysitting service would be considered a business and should pay taxes. So does she have a license, or does the state not require it.

This raised alarm bells for me too. Here in the UK, home babysitters (childminders - always reminds me of the Child Catcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang!) are regulated. They can only have a certain number of children in their care at any given time, and only one of those children can be under the age of 1. They can (and often are) inspected by Social Services. Daycare in the U.S. is also heavily regulated. Daycare centers have to have a certain number of adults per children, they can only take x number of children under the age of 1, etc. It sounds to me like (a) if this woman isn't paying taxes and (b) she had 10 kids there, she's doing something illegal. Personally, I find it offensive that she's banging on about a legally binding contract when she's not exactly operating to the letter of the law.

**craftypam** · 11-15-2009, 03:08 PM

Totally agree about the legality of it all. She wants to have a contract to make it all legal for her where it benefits her, but when it benefits you she's not interested. Myself, I would never have agreed to those prices in the first place. Under the circumstances of how expensive she is I would leave and find someone else and never look back.

**WV_mom_of2** · 11-15-2009, 03:18 PM

She is supposed to pay taxes. She is running a business as a self-employed person. It's not legal for her to do daycare without paying taxes(at least in my state it's not).

Whether she needs to be licensed, how many kids she can have,etc. will depend on where she lives. Different states have different rules about that.

The real question though isn't whether she pays taxes or not. The problem is the OP knew up front that she didn't pay taxes. She knew that the contract stated two weeks notice with pay and she signed it. She knew that there was a possibility of losing her job and she'd have to pay those two weeks anyway and she signed the contract. She knew she wanted 20.00 for that one hour of watching the kids and she left them there. Yes 20.00 for an hour is nuts. I charged that for an entire day but she owes the woman her money. It's not fair to make a contract, whether written or verbal, with the sitter and then try to back out. This is exactly why I gave up doing daycare. None of the mothers wanted to honor our agreement. They got A+ care for their kids all the time and I went above and beyond my part of the agreement and then they wanted to not pay me on time, not pay me what they owed me, change my days around with no notice, etc.

**Nana2two** · 11-15-2009, 03:30 PM

I personally would ask to see her license.

**Nishu** · 11-15-2009, 03:32 PM

This is not an honest person that you're dealing with. She's most likely not licensed to do day care at all. Some people get tax deductions for child care costs and she's screwing people out of that benefit by not filing taxes.

Yes, you absolutely should just pay the 20 and not look back.

It is a sad fact of business that people will take advantage of those in a tight spot. Even if a person has unethical business practices, you still have to pay.

That wouldn't stop me from reporting her though. Eight kids for one person, depending on their age and needs, may not be safe, and it's likely not even legal.

**2ndGenGranola** · 11-15-2009, 03:40 PM

If you are self employed, you do not pay taxes if you make below a certain amount (at least in my state and my previous state).

If she has a contract you really need to go by that. Everyone always wants you to work with them, cut them slack for this and that, bend and tweek it here and there. It just gets crazy with all the stuff you are asked to do.

I would guess that she charges more for short term because that can be very disturbing to the schedule and to the kids especially if a parents wants to talk or if a child is unhappy. When I had to go into the hospital we had to get quick short term care for 2 kids. Three days cost us over $300. I would have been more than happy to pay the price she gave you. Many places don't even take short term or drop in.

**Nishu** · 11-15-2009, 04:00 PM

If she were legally avoiding taxes by remaining below a certain amount of income, the OP wouldn't even know about her taxes. Plus with 8 kids, she's meeting that minimum. I don't think this is what's going on here.

Honor the agreement, absolutely, but what she's doing is tax evasion and it is illegal and unfair to the OP. If I were OP, I'd talk to an accountant about ammending my tax return to claim the childcare expenses.

Saving a buck on your taxes at the expense of others is wrong, and this is coming from someone who doesn't believe in income tax at all.

OP, I'm glad you're here. Judging from this and other posts I think you need someone on your side that has some idea what they're doing in matters of money and business.

**WV_mom_of2** · 11-15-2009, 05:31 PM

"considering i paid 2 weeks when i left there without her watching the kids..she coudlnt work with me a little? also if she charged 10 per kid an hr she would be making more then me..if i only was paid 12 an hr and she wants 20.00??"

This was the OP's reason for posting. She wanted opinions on this question(if I read her post correctly). I think maybe we all got a little sidetracked on the not paying taxes thing LOL.

The tax thing is a past issue. She terminated the contract with the woman when she lost her job at some time in the past. She then asked the woman to open up her schedule and keep the kids for a one day thing(orginally) so she could go out with her mom. Then she needed her for an hour the next day and that is where the 20.00 thing came up.

Here is my take on that..... It's your job as a parent to know ahead of time what the daycare provider charges. If I charged 35.00 for a day for two kids then I would have charged you probably 5.00 for an hour(as long as it didn't become a regular thing and heck, I'm nice LOL). It does disrupt my day to take them for just an hour. If they are here for an entire day I can work with them all day but an hour requires me to stop what I'm doing for drop off and pickup, etc. If there are other kids here it may disrupt meal time or nap time, etc.

As the parent you need to know how much the fee will be ahead of time. IF you asked and she told you 20.00 and you left the kids there then you agreed to that 20.00. If you failed to ask her and left them there, then you owe what she charges because it's your job to ask ahead of time. I know that you were in a stressful situation with a death in the family and needed the sitter so you might have not asked ahead of time and that's understandable. But you still owe her.

When she was your sitter before she presented you with a contract. It stated that she didn't pay taxes and didn't want you to turn it in on yours(or she told this verbally, either way it's a contract) and that she required a two week notice with pay. This is standard and it's because she depends on the money from her sitting. She has bills to pay too and a lot of people will just drop the sitter with no notice at all leaving them high and dry. When you signed the contract you agreed to that. You had the option of trying to negotiate with her BEFORE you signed it and chose not to. You had the option of finding another sitter who paid taxes and agreed to your terms as the parent. You chose to agree with her terms and sign the contract. She may or may not be doing something fishy with her taxes. That's going to be HER problem with the IRS if she is. However it's not really fair to think that she now owes you favors because you couldn't turn it on your taxes or you paid her for those two weeks but didn't use her services. That isn't her fault. It was spelled out in the contract and you signed it. If you were paying her for those two weeks then you had the option of leaving the kids there and getting your money's worth. So no, I don't think she should feel obligated in any way to work with you now because of that fact. Would it be nice of her take into consideration your job loss and a death in your family, YES! But it doesn't make her a bad person if she doesn't.

Sitters are doing a job and they have to have rules to protect themselves. As a parent you should always feel that you can try to negotiate the contract up front and if you aren't happy with something or something feels off or fishy, find someone else!

**Nishu** · 11-15-2009, 05:49 PM

It's standard to state in a contract that you illegally hide your income from the IRS and that you expect the parent not to claim the childcare expense so that you can continue to do it?

The tax issue to me is huge. And I don't think it's past. If she could claim childcare expenses on her 2009 taxes if this woman were an honest business, then she's still going to be paying for this woman's dishonesty next year when tax time rolls around. If this were happening in 2008, same thing, if she paid more taxes than she would have then she can amend the return and claim the childcare and get a check.

The $20 and two week notice? Yeah, non issue. You signed a contract and after the job is done is no time to negotiate price.

However, drawing up a contract that says "I do something illegal and you can't turn me in for it" is pretty much wack.

**savvy_sniper** · 11-15-2009, 05:53 PM

You knew what her prices were upfront. It doesn't matter if she is legal or not. You knew all that upfront also. I would not have told her I wasn't going to use her any more due to her prices UNTIL I shopped around AND came up with SEVERAL alternatives.

**sahm2boys** · 11-15-2009, 06:12 PM

Originally Posted by WV_mom_of2

I used to do in home daycare and I have to side with her. If you knew she paid no taxes and if you signed a contract saying you'd give her two weeks notice with pay, then it's a contract and you should honor it with no fussing. People who always change their minds and the rules are why she has a contract in the first place. I ran into this all the time. Moms would agree on a price and a pay day. Then they would argue they didn't owe me that much, "forget" that they got paid and needed to pay me, "forget" that they took a day off and not show up for my day and not call and then not want to pay me because I didn't watch the kids, etc. You have to remember, this is her JOB. You wouldn't expect to work and not get paid or for your job to not honor a contract with you. How would you feel if you had a job with an agreed upon pay rate and then after you worked your boss tried to negotiate with you on your pay? And you have to remember(if I read your post right) that you have asked her to take your kids these last couple of days with very short notice.

Babysitting is a very HARD job and in my opinion it's one of the most important things someone can do for you. I didn't get the feeling that she was a bad sitter or that you had any problems with her other than the paying thing. You should pay her what was agreed upon. Then if her price is too high for you don't use her again.

i paid all that stuff that she asked for long ago
i guess my main thing is that she wasnt willing to work with me at all after i did pay the two weeks with out child care...i didnt get any severance and had all ready been paid so i didnt have the money to pay her, unemployment took 2 months but i did pay her and my thing is this one time i asked her to watch the kids and it was an hr she wanted what i thought was a high price

**sahm2boys** · 11-15-2009, 06:25 PM

no i knew her price for the day was 35 which is a NEW price not a contracted price

i assumed like an ass that it would be considerably less

i guess its i was fair in not getting anything back on my taxes, paying per the contract for 2 weeks no child care because i couldnt afford to drop the kids off because gas. when i lost my job i didnt get a last paycheck or anything and unemployment was delayed 2 months...so i guess like me i would expect a little more friendliness? i dont know if thats the right term...but i was good to her and she could have done the same.

we werent under any contract at this point..i know i didnt disrupt any thing because HER older kids were watching mine in the back yard while she played on the computer...but im not one to say anything, start agurments or confrontations ...

i asked how much when i went to leave and she said 20 i was totally stunned its not much but when you really dont have it, it sounds like a lot so i guess she just struck a cord with me...we are paying her no doubt but i did explain that her prices were to steep and we wouldnt be requesting her services any longer.

like a poster stated everything was to her benefit
no taxes, but she got paid when the kids werent there at all, or not all day and she got paid severance for 2 weeks when i didnt...she acted like a business where it benefited her but not the client which i agreed to because i needed somone i could trust and who seemed to have a nice clean home