Don't want to decorate this year.

**lovestolaugh** · 11-25-2009, 01:44 PM

I have absolutely 0 Christmas spirit this year. I don't even want to bother decorating or baking. Am I the only one that feels this way? It's the economy and the stress of my day to day life. I think I'm a tad bit depressed this year. I love to watch Christmas movies and listen to music but I have no desire to pull out the tree and ornaments. My kids are both young teenagers and they are both going through a difficult phase. I mean THEY are difficult! LOL! They are totally self absorbed and only care about spending time with their friends. Trying to get them to participate in family traditions is like pulling teeth. I just don't have the energy to fight with them. Besides, if you have to MAKE someone participate, what's the point?

Anyways, just needing to hear from others that I'm not a bad parent for wanting to take a year off.

Thanks for listening to me vent!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

**nodmicks** · 11-25-2009, 02:22 PM

Your definitely not a bad parent. Teens are totally self absorbed. My oldest teen just asked me today if he could go have T-day dinner at his girlfriends. This will be the first T-day ever we have had a quiet dinner at home and dh and I were looking forward to it. Ugh but that is a teenager for you.

I hope you feel a bit more chipper soon! Hugs!

**Lady_V** · 11-25-2009, 02:39 PM

I love Yule... I plan for Yule all year long... I am The Yule Queen!!!

usually

I am trying to blame the weather --- but it doesn't FEEL like Yuletime. Tree goes up tomorrow, family tradition. Cards are made out. Movies are on the bookshelf waiting to be watched.

**shoiji** · 11-25-2009, 02:45 PM

Really don't think you are a bad parent. You are human you know. If you feel like taking a break from all the holiday madness go ahead. I do hope you start feeling better though.

**JanieD** · 11-25-2009, 03:12 PM

I sort know where you're coming from. My situation is different in a number of ways, but I'm lacking a bit of Christmas spirit too. I tend to get stressed over stuff around the holidays anyway. However, with dh's health problem that still isn't resolved after doctors & more doctors & test after test, I'm just not in the right frame of mind for the holidays. Life doesn't slow down just because the holidays are here.

Oh well, whatever doesn't get done will be OK. Often, I don't even remember what was skipped. Wasn't too important if I don't even notice its missing. You could ask the teens what they enjoy most & do those... skip the rest. Often, I'm surprised by how much I enjoy the little things that I actually get around to (or make myself do).

**Debbie-cat** · 11-25-2009, 03:14 PM

You aren't a bad parent at all and I understand how you feel. If you feel like it will not be appreciated then don't do anything and see how your children react. It might be a big eye opener for them. Good luck and sending hugs.

**McD** · 11-25-2009, 03:18 PM

You aren't a bad parent at all. It's hard to be the only one who puts forth an effort.

Just try to remember---sometime you gotta fake it until you make it. I have found this applies to motivation as well.

**mauimagic** · 11-25-2009, 04:43 PM

Faking it til you make it helps sometimes!! You can also just do what is important to you.

You are neither a bad person nor a bad mother. Your children are growing up and sometimes it's more challenging that others. Important thing is to be true to your heart. Take care!!

**Lora88** · 11-25-2009, 05:18 PM

Sometimes you have to reinvent the holidays I have found as life changes its the little things I do that matter give yourself permission to do less and let it come naturally you may not feel like putting up the tree till Christmas eve but I will bet your kids will eventually say Mom arent we going to decorate?

**AmyBoz** · 11-25-2009, 06:13 PM

I don't think it's a problem to let it go this year. The truth is, while it's going to be tough to draw them in because of where they are right now, it's going to be almost impossible to draw them in to something that they'll be able to tell you don't really want to do either.

If no one is feeling it this year, perhaps this is a good year to let it go by the wayside and then if it seems you all miss it, you'll know for next time.

**carlitasway** · 11-25-2009, 06:59 PM

If you really feel this way I wouldn't even think of pulling out any decorations until some asks when you will finally do it. If they never do then no decorating- unless you end up changing your mind and decide to.

**Contrary Housewife** · 11-25-2009, 07:31 PM

There have been years when I have had no desire to decorate either. I was either just not in the mood, or we weren't going to be home, or I was sick. Usually I just pull out one or two things, a single strand of lights, or a holiday tablecloth, and line up whatever cards we get.

It's too early IMO to put up decorations anyway. Give it a few weeks. If the kids want decorations, let them help with it, they'll have more energy.

**HandyMom** · 11-25-2009, 11:42 PM

I'm right there with you lovestolaugh. I haven't put up any Christmas decorations for a couple years now. DD was being totally selfish and said she didn't even care if I didn't put up a tree. After a couple years she said it was not like Christmas since there were no decorations. Then I pointed out all the homes that had no decorations either. So you aren't alone. We do all that work for them and then they don't want to help.

Besides, if you want to see a bunch of Christmas stuff you can always go shopping right around Halloween and afterward and get your fill without having it all up all over your home! I am so sick of seeing red and green that I can hardly wait until the stores get rid if it all.

**kittykatstrong** · 11-26-2009, 01:24 AM

I am not really feeling it this year either. I will do acouple of things that matter to me and the kids and let the rest fail by the wayside.

**Libby** · 11-26-2009, 02:06 AM

I agree with what the others have said, if you're not feeling it, don't force it. If/when the kids realize you're not going to do it, they may even offer to do it for you or help do it with you - decorate. Even if its not all your stuff, its their desire to do so that counts.

I was just debating that today - watching all the Thanksgiving sales on the tv for the US stores. Last year I put up my tree - base plus 1.5" plug in fibre optic one piece tree. I only put it up b/c I had gifts to put under it or near it lol.

This year...probably nothing. My dad decorates (he puts up his mini tree) about 4 days before Christmas lol. It goes back in the garage on Boxing Day (Dec 26).

This year - no gifts going out my door. Baked goods, possible homemade crafts - thinking of trying homemade soap this year. And for the real kids I have 4 of them - real toys $8-$10 max/each kid. Other then that - the siblings know there's no gift exchange for me this year.

I think I'll celebrate the holiday season by enjoy other's decor that's up on their houses and the parks. I love the lights the most!

Happy Holidays!