Help My teenager is smoking!!

[lilk]

My 13 year old has been sneaking around smoking. My dh smokes and I don't. We have caught him a couple times within the last year. What do you do to get them to quit? I know he keeps sneaking them from his dads pack. I hide them so he can't get them. He has even got ciggaretts from the ash tray, that his dad had smoked and not finished. YUCK! I don't know what to do. I'm so upset-mad at him. I told him he is grounded. Dh doesn't know yet, he will find out tonight when he gets home. I just want some input on what you have done, or would do if you have this problem? He doesn't do alot. He is mostly here, and playing video games. So no games, or t.v., but we've done this before.

[VanVivCam]

My daughter is only eight...so, I haven't faced this problem yet..and I hope I never do.

I have personally spoke with my DD to let her know my battles with cigs and how hard it is to quit. Also, maybe go online and find pics of lungs/mouth cancer and so forth...maybe you can still scare him straight.

Good luck to you!

[Kitten20]

Keep in mind that I don't have children yet, but it seems the more you make something "off limits", the more teens want to do it. It is especially hard when your DH smokes ("do as I say, not as I do"). I would probably tell him that he is not old enough to make the decision on whether or not he wants to smoke and risk lung cancer and all the other health problems that go along w/ it. If he chooses, he can do it when he is 18 and no longer under your roof. Your house, your rules.

ETA: Or let him come on FV and talk to all of us who started smoking when we were teens and wish we hadn't! lol

[Josephhgoins]

My Mom made nothing off limits that we wanted to try. My Granddad often would get us to try it.

He gave my cousin and I a very big hunk of Tobacco one time to chew. He told us you chew it for a while and then swallow it. We were both sick as dogs for a day or more, but never chewed again.

My mom let me try cigarettes too, she got a pack just for me. A beginner pack, she said. They were the unfiltered full flavor camels. Yeah, I spent a while coughing and hacking, got sick and didn't smoke ever again.

(I just realized that my family is pretty dang mean)

Just giving you some ideas.

Good luck!

[Debbie-cat]

I don't mean any disrespect at all but with your hubby smoking, are you really surprised? Kids are most likely to smoke when one of their parents do.

The only thing you can do is explain the dangers and how difficult it is to quit. If he is sneaking around stealing them, he already is addicted. Make sure no ashtrays, smokes are laying around anywhere that he has access to. Even outside. If your DH has a smoke and throws a butt on the ground, he will pick them up from there as well. I wish you luck. It is going to be difficult to keep him from it. ((hugs))

[Russ]

[happycat]

I agree with Debbie-cat; it's going to be tough to get your son to quit, when he sees your dh doing it. Is there any possibility this may inspire your dh to quit? Maybe it's something they could do together, and it would be better for the whole family.

[pollypurebred39]

Oh My Russ, What a visual!!!!

[2ndGenGranola]

My uncle tried smoking for a while when he was younger. Granddad figured it out and took a pack of cigs out to the barn. He emptied out the factory fillings and refilled it with barnyard droppings (chicken, I think) then nicely put a touch of the factory fillings back in for a pretty end. Up until the day he died uncle would turn green at the mention of a cig.

[Russ]

Here's a link to a PP presentation with some facts regarding smoking.
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I do want to say that I doubt grounding or taking away a few privledges will help. It didn't stop me.

Sit him down and talk to him like an adult. Ask him what he knows about smoking, why he is doing it, and does he realize what will happen should he become addicted?
Put it in a monetary sense... if he gets an allowance compare the cost of one pack vs... minimum wage, his allowance, the cost of a video game. Take him to a bowling alley or a restaurant with a heavily used smoking section. Then make him smell his clothes the next day YUCK. That's what he will smell like if he becomes a smoker.

Yelling at him will not help IMO.

[lilk]

Thanks for your all support. We've explained the rules about no smoking under our roof, your not old enough. He still does it. I've showed him pictures of cancer on the internet, and made him write a report of why cigs are bad for you. He still does it. He knows my friend died of cancer last year (not the same cancer, but cancer non-the-less). He still does it!!! My 17 yr. old made him eat a cig butt. He still does it..
We haven't made him smoke a pack of cigs yet. I don't know what to do. I hate to make him smoke the pack because of the chemicals, but if that would make him stop, I might do it. I don't know....

[ktsmama]

My mom caught me playing with my grandparents full flavored Camels with no filter. I was about 10 or 11. She made me eat the cigarette. When you puke green for a couple of days, you kinda don't think smoking is all that great.

Good luck! I hope this works out for the best.

[lilk]

Debbie-cat - I'm not suprised at all. I told dh he sees him doing it, so he thinks its okay.
happycat- I've asked dh to quit, no luck .. So far.
I don't think I will put the poo-poo in the cigs. Nasty..
Dh tried yelling at him, and made him feel terrible. I told dh that wasn't the right thing to do. So dh talked to him. Told him he doesn't want him to get addicted to them, and that it's a waste of money. He knows how nasty it makes you smell.

[Nana2two]

I was 15 when i started sneaking around doing it, Both my parents smoked, when they found i had taken from the ash tray they started wetting them and throwing them away. They kept the packs on them at all times, if they went to the kitchen, bathroom ect the pack went also. I stopped because my resource ran out.

[pop goes the weasel]

i hate to say it but unless you are with them 24/7 there is not really any way to force them to stop. If they want to smoke they will get them one way or another. Friends, neighbors ect. Good luck.