Lonely - what to do

**dwnloom** · 06-22-2010, 04:29 PM

Ok here is my situation. I am married but have to work out of town. I was layed off in Novemeber, no jobs in our area, so work 4 rs away. So, here is my situation, I am staying in a 37 ft 5th wheel. I have a great job and great family.....but.....I am alone from Sunday night till Friday night. I am very grateful to be working and have a clean safe place to stay along with keeping my house, etc. Can you please give me some ideas for things to do? I find myself eating out, just because I dont want to go home and be alone. I know this sounds like I'm whining and maybe I am but it has been years and years since I was alone....I do sew and read...when I can make myself go home. Please give me some suggestions.....Thanks

**Darlene** · 06-22-2010, 04:34 PM

Any chance of volunteering somewhere? That would be a win win for you and the group you help out.

**frugalfranny** · 06-22-2010, 04:35 PM

It will be an adjustment, but maybe you could use this time to sew up some of the 'secret' Xmas presents that you would have to hide if you were home.

Try to think of the little things that you need to do when you "get some peace and quiet"........you have it now, use it to your advantage.

Make yourself go home and cook a good meal........tell yourself about all the money you will be saving from not eating out. Not to mention how much healthier it is! Make something SPECIAL for yourself......something that maybe you wouldn't make if you were home because the family wouldn't like it.

Can you invite a co-worker to eat with you? Maybe trade nights for cooking with some people you work with.

**leighcat** · 06-22-2010, 05:13 PM

I am a very lonely person too. My kids don't sleep here most nights because I get up too early for work so they sleep at dad's. I see them every day (except every other Saturday) but usually only a few hours unless I have the next day off. My bf I only see Fri and Sat. I am a fool and I stay with him so I won't be completely and totally alone. I am just wasting my time on him...
I do stay busy when the kids have their activities but I still feel very lonely.
I read, go online, and busy myself with small projects or movies to watch.
I guess I don't do anything differently than you are doing now but I wanted to let you know you aren't the only lonely one.

Just remember you are doing this for the best of reasons. This too shall pass and everything will get better.

**ml2620** · 06-22-2010, 05:27 PM

You are probably tired from a day at work, but if not, why not get a dumb, fun little job, bagging groceries, working at a coffee shop or bar or restaurant, someplace where you'd interact with people in your area, stay busy and make a little money? Bonus if its the grocery store, you get an employee discount and can bring home discounted groceries to your family each week.

**Josephhgoins** · 06-22-2010, 05:47 PM

Have you thought about joining a bowling league? There is a website called Meetup.com where you can find like minded folks to hang out with.

One in my area has a group that meets up to play board games and another meets up to cook meals together and try new things.

Have you thought of night classes? Might learn some new things AND have fun too.

Lastly, is a pet possible? I was terribly lonely until I got my cat here with me. He constantly keeps me entertained and I never feel alone with him. You would just have to bring him home with you on the weekends.

Let us know what you decide, I really need some new things in my life as well.

**Rhiamon** · 06-22-2010, 06:00 PM

What about joining a knitting group or something similar? Or a walking group? Are there people that you work with that you could do stuff with once in a while? What about a book club or something similar? I don't work right now and I spend alot of time at the library when I have to go into town. I have never read so much as I have this last little while. I have discovered some new authors and found some great books.

**Contrary Housewife** · 06-22-2010, 06:30 PM

Nights are the hardest, because it seems like everyone else is home with their families... or out trying to pick someone up.

I second some of the other suggestions... go out with co-workers, find a bowling group or book club.

How late is the local library open? There's usually other people there, even if you're not interacting with them it will help you not be alone. Plus you can get books or movies to watch to fill up your evening cheaply. Or hang out online.

**lparker** · 06-22-2010, 07:06 PM

You got the 5th wheeler parked in a park with other campers? If so, see what activities are offered - if no activities, start some.

**frugalwarrior2** · 06-22-2010, 08:03 PM

Do you have a webcam for your computer. We got one so my DH and the kids could see each other when he travels (which is a lot)
Join a church? Wed. night feast and bible studies,weight loss groups,suppers
Maybe meet a new friend that way??

**dwnloom** · 06-23-2010, 02:09 PM

Thank you all for the wonderful ideas. I will have to try to do some of them. I'll definitely let you know how it turns out.

**cljordan** · 06-23-2010, 09:37 PM

Instead of eating out, grab a book and just go get coffee. Or go to a local mall and walk. See if there are book clubs at a library near where you work.

**dwnloom** · 06-24-2010, 09:52 AM

Last night, I joined the library. I spent about two hours there. I have also called a couple churches.....They have Wednesday night bible study...so that might be another option.

Thank you all for the ideas.

**Saule** · 06-24-2010, 11:11 PM

Is there a community college or adult education through the local high school district? I had worked and gone to school nights, and when I finished and got a job in my field, I was also a bit at loose ends. I found a local community college and took several months worth of cooking classes. It was fun, I met some new people, and I learned to cook stuff I liked to eat but did not know how to make. Or perhaps you want to learn a language or discuss Great Books or whatever.... The non credit classes are generally very good value. Last semester I took a singing class.

**mek42** · 06-24-2010, 11:21 PM

Originally Posted by Saule

... Last semester I took a singing class.

No mp3's, didn't happen.

To the OP, lot's of good suggestions. Could you offer to babysit on some evenings too? Or volunteer at a nursing home or hospital to visit the visitorless?

Or schedule a time when all your kids are out to have an, ahem, warm, loving phone call with hubby?