In case your wondering... things are getting better

**Dancing Lotus** · 09-24-2010, 12:47 PM

So in the three weeks since getting rid of the extra TV my evenings have been really nice.
The family and I are doing the dishes together every night. We often go for a walk or bike ride and once the kids are tucked in the husband and I have plenty of time to chat. We have talked more in the last three weeks then we have in months. Of course this isn't just because of the TV but the husband has put away his laptop too.

The only time I miss my TV is in the afternoon before hubby gets home. The house work is done, the computer is done and the kids are watching cartoons.
And that's not all that's gotten better in the late hours of the night

While it wasn't our only problem I do believe that electronics were interfering with my family's life. Getting rid of that TV was the best thing for us.

I also want to say that my husband has made tremendous efforts to help me understand what's going on in his head. While I can't forget the hurt he caused me I know that he was sick. He was overstressed and many things lead to him feeling like a complete failure. He does not do failure well. Nor does he ask for help.
I do know for a 100% certainty that it was not a sexual affair but her attention was fulfilling an emotional need.
Last night while talking he seamed so happy and excited. He is looking at me with a sparkle in his eye and i catch him smiling while he watches me.
We have a lot of work do but something clicked lat night that told me I have my best friend back.

**Maine Girl** · 09-24-2010, 12:51 PM

Oh Ann that is wonderful thank you for sharing!!!

**rissimo** · 09-24-2010, 01:04 PM

Oh Ann, this is great news. I have been praying for you and wondering how things were going. I am so glad that you have your best friend back, it is such a wonderful feeling. I hope you contiune the communication... big

**G'MaDebbie** · 09-24-2010, 02:50 PM

Ann, that is GREAT news!! I am so happy to hear that things are starting to work out again for you. Remember that not every day will be this way, and your husband may stumble a time or tow on his way to getting well....however if he knows that you are there for him , it will make his journey a lot easier.
Good Luck to your family!!

**Dancing Lotus** · 09-24-2010, 02:56 PM

I expect plenty of bad days, these things take a lot of time. I'm just glad to know that we are both going in the right direction.

**hmcart** · 09-24-2010, 05:05 PM

I am a little out of the loop but I will be praying for you Ann!

**Michelle68** · 09-24-2010, 07:08 PM

I'm happy that things are getting better for you and the family, Ann.

**frugalfoster** · 09-25-2010, 10:29 AM

I've been on vacation...I was wondering how you were doing...thanks for letting us know... we care!!

**jas** · 09-25-2010, 12:35 PM

Wonderful news! Happy for both of you.

**Labontet** · 09-25-2010, 05:27 PM

This is great news Ann. I have been keeping up with you and am so glad that the family and you and your husband are working things out.
Isn't it amazing how distractions can sneak up on you and put up such barriers in relationships?
Keeping you all in my thoughts and prayers.
Way to Go!

**Dancing Lotus** · 10-20-2010, 01:58 PM

Thought it was time for an update:
We have definitely made some great progress. We have identified that neglect has been a major player in all of this. We have not only neglected our relationship as a couple but also ourselves as individuals.
I hadn't realized how much my husband was doing without so that the rest of us could have. This weekend we took him shopping just for him, he needed new clothes so badly. When the girls whined they wanted something I told them it's wasn't their turn , it was Dad's.

Tomorrow we leave to go on the three night cruise to the Bahamas. We paid to fly my mil here to stay with the girls so that we could just be a couple for a few nights. I bought a new dress for dancing and he even got a professional hair cut rather then doing it himself. I can't wait.
He is now going to private counseling to deal with his childhood and I don't' really feel that i need anymore counseling. Im not the sort to hang onto bad feelings. In have already forgiven him and I only want to live in the present and the future , not the past.

**jas** · 10-20-2010, 02:50 PM

Have fun on the cruise! Sometimes these things are what is needed the most! Some may think that the expense is not worth it, but the cost of no relationship would be the worst cost of all.

Have the time of your lives!

**frugalfoster** · 10-21-2010, 08:08 AM

I am so happy for you Ann!!! You definitely put your priorities in order...In today's world, alot of people might have just walked away. When they say for better or for worse...you kept that promise...Integrity, it's a hard thing to find now a days, how refreshing to see it on a frugal living website...God Bless You..and have a great time on your cruise!!!

**mamamia** · 10-21-2010, 09:08 AM

It sounds like the two of you fell in love with each other all over again! I hope you have a "honeymoon" cruise, and return as the "blushing bride"....lol! The both of you deserve this so much!

So happy for you and your hubby!

Theresa

**fairydana** · 10-23-2010, 12:57 AM

Ann!! That is awesome news!! Thank you so much for letting us know. I have been thinkin about ya and praying for you!! Big hugs to you and your dh!! Keep moving forward girlie!!

By the way, I am loving your profile picture!! Sweet!!