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10-24-2010, 03:45 PM #1
Any parents of severe food allergic children?
My son is severely allergic to peanuts, and my daughter to shellfish. I guess I am a bit disturbed at the vitriol I see on this forum towards parents and schools that are trying to keep these children safe. A peanut or tree nut allergy is not the same as other allergies.
I really hope that parents who seem inconvenienced by having to put a bit more thought and effort into their kid's lunches know how truly lucky they are that they have a choice. My child's life is depending on you and your food choices. I don't want my son to come home in a bodybag because someone thought that their "right" to peanut butter trumps my child's right to live.
This is a really sensitive area, and unless you are a parent with this you cannot know the fear we have. Why do people think that if they are allergic to peanuts they should stay home and be homeschooled? Do we keep other children with disablities home?
Sorry, but I had to get this off my chest. Feel free to delete it if you will, mods.
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10-24-2010, 04:32 PM #2
I've not posted anything about this before..even though my children don't have any food allergies I can't imagine the fear you must have never knowing whether it be in school or a restaurant or anything that could trigger a reaction that is vital to your children's life..My girlfriend is allergic to fruit of any kind..at work I was opening a carton of orange juice to give my resident a drink and it splashed onto her skin..she broke out instantly into very large welt's from just a few drops..How scary if it had splashed into her mouth? I know in my school peanut butter sandwiches are served on a daily basis..not sure why they didn't ban it yet?...I'm sure no one ment to be insensative intentionally to you or anyone here at he village.. HUGS..
Wife to Keith
Mom of 3 boys
Brandon
Kody
Dustin
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10-24-2010, 05:34 PM #3
Not my children, but *I* have life-threatening food allergies. Thankfully not to something so common as peanut butter or shellfish but I definitely have a different attitude towards allergies in general since being diagnosed myself.
(((HUGS))) to you.
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10-24-2010, 05:47 PM #4
I'm allergic to all nuts, strawberries and rasberries. It is scary to me and I'm an adult. I wonder why more schools don't use soy butter. It taste like peanut butter to me. I've just discovered soybutter a couple mths ago. I eat it everyday now. I use to be able to eat all nuts and peanut butter. I became allergic as an adult. I would think schools would use soy butter especially with so many nut allergy's . Hugs to you.
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10-24-2010, 06:22 PM #5
I'm a teacher as our lower school is peanut-free. The parents are very supportive for the most part. several of our students having life threatening peanut allergies.
I love being a History Teacher!
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10-24-2010, 06:47 PM #6Registered User
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I have severe food allergies, too. Allergic to peanuts, tree nuts (except almonds), and shellfish. I remember those elementary school days (I'm 28 now) and I feel like it was even more difficult when I was a kid b.c people didn't take it as seriously then as they do now. I have family members who still don't understand how life-threatening it can be and will do things like slice bread with a knife they used to spread peanut butter without cleaning it in between.
As a parent, never ever be embarrassed about guarding your kids' health. You wouldn't let other parents' kids play out in the middle of the street and some parents just don't understand that food allergies are that serious.
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10-24-2010, 07:47 PM #7
My grandson age 3 has a allergy to cinnamon. Found out one day when i bought cinnamon apple sauce. He had a red rash around is mouth and inside is mouth were tiny blisters.
If you want to live a happy life, tie it to a goal. Not to
people or things.
- Albert Einstein
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Don't wait for a crisis to look at your finances differently. Look at them differently now and avoid the crisis.
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10-24-2010, 09:06 PM #8
I'm a double epi carrier myself. My kids have allergies too. One just had to take a breathing treatment after ingesting yellow 5.
The complainers will change their tune when they get their karma.
One of the meanest dudes to my milk allergic kid ended up eating some sour words when his kid ended up with the same allergy.
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10-24-2010, 10:34 PM #9
my 13 yo has developed an allergy we feel is shellfish although both the pirck tests and blood tests came back neg so far .- i know what its is by process of elimination and just seeing what happens.
also possibly to Tumerin spice - often used to colr things yellow .
its an age that apparently allergies can show up out of nowhere ! because she is old enough to be out on her own a bit it scares me but i make her carry liquid benadry in a individual dose containor to take if she feels any swelling coming on and she knows to call me right away .
i mean she could go to a pizza place that also serves fired shrimp and sit at a table where someone wiped hands on a bench after eating it - didnt clean table well etc.
i think hmm her older sister makes good $ as a waitress- but would she be able to do same job since they do serve seafood at that restuarant ?
rather than have the child with peanut allergies sit alone our school has a table where if a child has peanut butter items and someone in their lunch table has an allergy they can be moved to - its very careully cleaned with a bleech solution - no one with peanut allergies uses that table and anyone eating peanuts has to wash up immediately after eating and are watched to make sure of it .
But alot of kids really do not like tuna or lunchmeats and cant afford to buy - teh schoosl dont always have a way to reheat warm foods PB is the only way to get protien into them - sometimes its a dietary need for kids with diabetes or hypoglycemia .
no one in my kids grades this year has peanut allergies but in the past they have- one kid was kicked out of the school when he was 11 for several reasons but the last straw was shoving his peanut butter and jelly sandwhich into the face of a kid with peanut allergies he was mad at .
may be the fact its a smaller private school that they can allow those who eat it eat it in a safe enviroment for those who cant and the fact parents volunteer to work in cafeteria and all know to be very careful .
Its really mostly a matter of education - people think you have to eat it and thats just not so .
That said the world isnt peanut free and will never be just as it is not shellfish free or latex free either ( i am latex sensative which means so much more than just not touching latex gloves there are foods i cant eat etc )
It seems obvious that in schools the lunch issue but someone could be at the mall and touch a rail or escalator that was touched by someone who just ate peanuts in a candy bar and left protien deposits behind. its so scary , !
when i had a birthday party for my now 16 yo in 1st grade he had a peanut allergic child in his class i called the mom and asked what kind of cake mix i could use to make the cake and what candy would be considered peanut free .
i made a special peanut free goody bag for him ( sorry but i couldnt afford to make it all 100% peanut free ) but they werent allowed to open them until they left -i handed them to the parents and told them why .
My daughter had a reaction after petting her friends cat .
cat had food that is seafood and ducks under can when being fed- oils got on cats fur- i guess my dd pet cat - must have touched her inner gums because braces were bothering her and next thing you know lips eyes nose all swollen up- we checked the cat food cn and it had shrimp and crab as part of teh ingredients.
she has another friend with cats that lives a good 40 min away she is afraid to go to her house now ( her best friend lives up the street so i can be there in seconds)
It is her best friends house and even though i would never ask her to she said she wasnt buying the seafood for the cat because it scared her .
hardest for me is letting her go to shore because i cant very well tell the people who have invited hre they cant eat shellfish - but we do let them know and she takes her benedryls and an epipen with her .
we have a 5 guys burgers around here and they use peanut oil i believe and also serve peanuts while you wait for your food but they also have huge signs by the door telling you not to take peanuts out of store due to potential allergies.
i think they are pretty well educated around here .*~Debbi~*
Happily Married Mom to 5 ;
PT Home Care RN 
Living with FMS
“Fear less, hope more; Eat less, chew more; Whine less, breathe more;
Talk less, say more; Love more, and all good things will be yours”
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Quit 2nd Job for health reasons so going slower .
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10-24-2010, 10:54 PM #10
We have found that people just don't get food allergies. Our youngest is allergic to a giant list of foods. None will cause death, but his reactions are quite violent and require immediate medical attention.
Only now at 16 can I feel "okay" about him eating at someone's home or a restaurant. He knows he can not eat ANYTHING with sauce, or mixed, like meatballs. (unless it's made at home) Everything must be completely plain and he can add his own salt, pepper & butter. People just don't get it, they say well a little bit of this can't hurt, OR if they gave him something and then he reacts, and they're all "But it was just a little bit". ARGH!!!! I've given people lists of the nos and they just ignore them and season with onions or garlic, try to feed him soup with the allergens in it. Drives me nuts!!!! Makes him very ill.
My DH has an allergy to an unknown substance. He ate a hoagie and ended up in the emergency room. He now carries an epi pen. The doctor believes since he never reacted before it must be a new preservative that they are using now and told him to expect to have this reaction again until it gets narrowed down
DS1 reacts to yellow dye and a few other additives in a very negative way. He too carries an epi pen.
Before the economy took a nose dive and messed with our bottom line we were an all organic family. Our food bill/HAB was through the roof, but we had peace of mind knowing the next meal/shower/cleaning day was not going to result in a trip to the emergency room.~~~
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10-24-2010, 11:35 PM #11
My children have allergies that cause health issues, breathing issues, and skin issues but not life threatening allergies. However I do have life threatening allergies to bananas and shellfish.
I agree that most of the world does not understand allergies, especially those that could cause immediate death.
I have learned that I can't control everyone else. So I educate my children on what they should do in different situations. and what the back up plan is if that fails. I have found that teaching my children to speak up and use the words "very allergic" or in son's case "can't breath if" or in my case "deathly allergic" That they have been able to get the help and adults listen to them. I believe this has hopefully prepared them for the world where there are not those around to protect them. KWIM?
I also tell those around me (at my table, not total strangers if family is not with me) especially at pot lucks that I'm allergic to and tell them what to do if I pass out. If I have a reaction to anything there. KWIM? Hubby and the kids also know to let any ambulance drivers ( like if I'm in a car wreak or something like that) know I'm allergic to shellfish so they don't use any medicine that shellfish allergic can't have. I also found out when my son had a IVP done that they were happy I told them I was allergic to shellfish so that they would know to keep a close eye on my son in case he had a reaction also ( even though we did not think he was allergic to shellfish)
yes the world is a scare place when you or your children are allergic to things.Last edited by imagine; 10-24-2010 at 11:58 PM.
"Everyday as your walking down the street, everybody that you met has an original point of view" -Arthur PBS
Imagine - Wife of 18 years to Hubby
Mom to Buddy (son 15) and Little Miss ( daughter 11)
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10-25-2010, 03:33 AM #12
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10-25-2010, 04:14 AM #13
Before they had a voice it was very hard to protect them.
It was one of the reasons I became a stay at home mom.
We moved and I had to find day care for my son then 18 months old and was diary allergic.
I would ask them in the interview if they wanted me to bring his lunch so they wouldn't have to worry about the meal they were making or if he could eat it. They would say things like "NO, he can eat the things I make." I would ask what they normally ate . They would answer. " Pizza, mac and cheese" things like that" They always seemed shocked when I would say they couldn't eat that stuff. some would even ask why?
One lady had had a milk allergic child. She said she I wouldn't need to bring a lunch as she would feed him marshmallows and pretzels when ever she served something he couldn't eat.Last edited by imagine; 10-25-2010 at 04:37 AM.
"Everyday as your walking down the street, everybody that you met has an original point of view" -Arthur PBS
Imagine - Wife of 18 years to Hubby
Mom to Buddy (son 15) and Little Miss ( daughter 11)
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10-25-2010, 04:33 AM #14
I agree so many have said "I'm allergic" that it doesn't mean much anymore.
My children are not anaphylaxis so I don't have them say that.
I have been known to tell people "I will literally die if I eat that". That does tend to get people's attention. Then they listen.
We have also had good luck with the children describing their other reactions. Like Little Miss has very sensitive skin. So when someone offers her lotion like a teacher she says "No thank you I have sensitive skin and will break out in a itchy rash"
The most unusual one is Buddy can not use Band Aid brand bandages. We don't know why. They break him out in a very long lasting rash. Even hospitals roll their eyes at that one. We have taken to telling them the reaction. " he can't ....... because every time he gets a rash, just where it sticks not where the pad is. One time we left in on longer than a min. and it caused such a weepy rash that it scared worse the the stitches he received the same day"
Yes, we have found that telling people exactly what will happen if... gets them to listen the best."Everyday as your walking down the street, everybody that you met has an original point of view" -Arthur PBS
Imagine - Wife of 18 years to Hubby
Mom to Buddy (son 15) and Little Miss ( daughter 11)
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10-25-2010, 07:41 AM #15
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