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Thread: answers to GED test
02-15-2011, 12:57 PM #1
answers to GED test
These are funny... although some of them have to be made up. (I don't think they represent the typical American 16 year old, either.)
> The following questions were in last year's GED examination
> These are genuine answers (from 16 year olds)...
> Q. Name the four seasons.
> A. Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar
> Q. Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink.
> A. Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large
> pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists
> Q. What causes the tides in the oceans?
> A. The tides are a fight between the earth and the moon. All water tends
> to flow towards the moon, because there is no water on the moon, and
> nature abhors a vacuum. I forget where the sun joins the fight
> Q. What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on?
> A. If you are buying a house they will insist that you are well endowed
> Q. In a democratic society, how important are elections?
> A. Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election
> Q. What are steroids?
> A. Things for keeping carpets still on the stairs
> Q.. What happens to your body as you age?
> A. When you get old, so do your bowels and you get intercontinental
> Q. What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?
> A. He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery
> Q. Name a major disease associated with cigarettes
> A. Premature death
> Q. How can you delay milk turning sour
> A. Keep it in the cow
> Q. How are the main 20 parts of the body categorized (e.g. The abdomen)
> A. The body is consisted into 3 parts - the brainium, the borax and the
> abdominal cavity. The brainium contains the brain, the borax contains
> the heart and lungs and the abdominal cavity contains the five bowels:
> A, E, I, O, and U..
> Q. What is the fibula?
> A. A small lie
> Q. What does 'varicose' mean?
> A. Nearby
> Q. What is the most common form of birth control?
> A. Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium
> Q. Give the meaning of the term 'Caesarean section'
> A. The caesarean section is a district in Downtown Rome
> Q. What is a seizure?
> A. A Roman Emperor. (Julius Seizure, I came, I saw, I had a fit)
> Q. What is a terminal illness?
> A. When you are sick at the airport.
> Q. Give an example of a fungus. What is a characteristic feature?
> A. Mushrooms. They always grow in damp places and they look like
> Q. Use the word 'judicious' in a sentence to show you understand its meaning.
> A. Hands that judicious can be soft as your face.
> Q. What does the word 'benign' mean?
> A. Benign is what you will be after you be eight
> Q. What is a turbine?
> A. Something an Arab or Shreik wears on his head
- 02-15-2011, 01:15 PM #2
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I don't mean to be rude, I know this is meant to be funny, but *I* took the GED test and I promise you that every single one of those is made up.~Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.~~The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people.~02-15-2011, 04:40 PM #3
02-15-2011, 05:03 PM #4
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GED tests are multiple choice. If these questions were true based on the way teenagers answer when they don't know, the answers would like like A instead of C or D instead of B.
You really think that "What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty?" might be a real GED question?
Or "What is a seizure?"
What is a seizure, btw? How many people can answer that to any degree of accuracy? It's a medical term describing a complicated neurological phenomenon that we don't even fully understand, and you think they're going to put that on a multiple choice GED test?
How about "Explain what causes the tides in the oceans?" Why the nonessential phrase "in the oceans?" Are there some other tides somewhere that have a different explanation?
How do you keep milk from going sour?? What school system or GED test would ask this?~Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.~~The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people.~02-16-2011, 08:57 AM #5
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I also took the GED test, and passed it, and there were no questions like that on it. I even worked as a teacher's aide with a program to help people prepare for the GED test and I graded all the practice tests they took . The answers were all multiple choice. Of course that was from 1984-1994. Maybe the tests have changed since then.02-16-2011, 09:22 AM #6
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i give props to ppl who take the ged test
i know a lot of ppl who have taken it and a few that failed
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