I guess I am hard to buy for.....Ugh!

[lovestolaugh]

My dh complains every holiday/birthday that I am hard to buy for. I have always thought he was crazy! I mean there are lots of things I would love to have, right? Well, my birthday is coming up this week and again he is complaining about not knowing what to get me. I make out lists of things I want but then I will tear them up because I really don't NEED anything. I pay all the bills and keep track of all the money. My dh has to charge whatever he buys me so then I worry about the bill coming in next month. Does anyone else have this problem? I guess he's right and I really am difficult!

[pollypurebred39]

Why not just ask for a cake, ice cream & soda and a few friends/family for a little birthday gathering as your present.

I know I'm hard to buy for, there's very little I want that's within our budget. Who wants to increase debt even if it's just $20? I'd much rather have a small family party every year, which is what we do. Less then $5 start to finish and lots of belly laughs, and smiles.

[shopper]

If you were in his shoes, what would you do or buy for your gift? Meaning, what would make you feel special on your birthday that your dh could do or get for you. I have found that my partner just wants to do something for me to express his love, if I don't give any indications of what, he has to resort to buying a gift that may be expensive or not really what I want.

[Spirit Deer]

Can you give him a list of things you'd buy anyway? Or inexpensive things you'd like?

What about, instead of flowers, flower seeds for your summer planting? Or a gift card from a greenhouse? I'm always tickled when it comes time to visit the greenhouses. With a gift card, you could pick out practical things like veggie plants and then go on about how great they are. Or use the money to try something you haven't tried growing before.

Is he handy? Would he be willing to build you a decorative planter for the front porch, that you could line with a cheap container?

Would he consider it a real gift if he 'gave' you a whole day or two days or whatever time he wants to or can, in order to wipe some things off the never-ending 'honey-do' list? Sometimes the gift of time and undivided attention is far more precious than a material gift.

What about a picnic in a nice park, just the two of you? Even a splurge on deli food doesn't have to be all that expensive.

Is there a hobby you'd like to learn? Maybe a small kit you could make or do would be interesting. Or is there a frugal skill you'd like to learn, but don't have the tools you need to learn it. Something that'll save you money in the long run is an investment, not a luxury.

Personally, my husband knows he can't go wrong if he gives me power tools, but I've heard for some reason that doesn't work with most women.

[cab54]

My DH and I quit buying things for each other for birthdays, mother's day, even Christmas. Of course, we have been married a loooong, looooonng time.

We ran out of ideas + we found ourselves with all kinds of clutter over the years from silly little things we bought each other. (38 years worth)

Tell him you are happy with a kiss and hug.

[MsMarieH]

How about looking around for something like a free concert that you two could go to together or some other free outing?

Hubby and I sign up for tons of free birthday clubs (cold stone creamery, red robin, old country buffet, a local movie theater, etc.) so we get a flurry of buy one get one free coupons during his birthday week. Then we go out for an inexpensive outing like a movie and lunch.

[shoiji]

Maybe if you had a certain amount that you spend on each other for birthdays it might be easier for you to think of a gift from your husband. That way you may feel more comfortable with splurging on yourself. But really all the suggestions already listed sound just as good.

I think it is sweet your husband wants to give you something special for your birthday.

One thing I do for myself is to buy things on clearance around the year for myself. I then wrap the items up when I get them home. Come my birthday or a holiday I have a box to go to and unwrap a "gift". It is always fun since I usually forget what I wrapped up. Plus it is very inexpensive! A package of new underwear really can be exciting!

[pollypurebred39]

LOL! Awesome shoiji!

[Early Bird]

Two quick thoughts:

* Give him a list of items you'd like.
* Go shopping with him and show him things you'd like. I do that, so I know he bought a nice, but inexpensive necklace for this year's birthday.

[zakity]

We quit buying each other gifts. We spend money as needed and "extra" items are considered gifts. Depending on the price of things, the item might be gifts for the rest of the year. DH bought some wanted (sort of needed, but more wanted) reloading stuff and that will be his "gifts" for the year.


Side note: If it is a needed item, it doesn't count as a gift. Buying yourself shirts because you need them doesn't count. Buying yourself that adorable pair of shoes on clearance for dirt cheap even though you don't need them, yeah, that counts.



Edited to add:
We used to have a $5 rule for gift giving holidays. It was enough to buy a token gift of a bag of a favorite candy or something small like that. And, it was nice to not break the bank for that sort of stuff.

[McD]

I'm signed up for Groupon and Living Social so I get emails each day showing the daily deal. Today's deal was a one hour hot stone massage for $40. I emailed that to hubby and told him that was what I wanted for my birthday.

[Imarachne]

Flowers--they are soo unnecessary but oh so nice to receive !!

[Ramona]

I'm signed up for Groupon and Living Social so I get emails each day showing the daily deal. Today's deal was a one hour hot stone massage for $40. I emailed that to hubby and told him that was what I wanted for my birthday.

You took the words right out of my mouth , there's nothing better than a professional massage and the hot stones add to the pleasure.

[ellebee]

My husband and I pretty much spell out to each other what we want for occasions. Usually its stuff that we dont let ourselves buy but its not really expensive. Last bday I requested 2 magazine subscriptions.

[mndtrp]

I've never understood people who say things like that. It's simply not paying attention to what the other person's interests are.

However, things in a pinch are easy. What woman wouldn't want a massage? What man wouldn't want a few bags of beef jerky?