Never take today for granted, tomorrow may never come.

**Dancing Lotus** · 05-13-2011, 03:51 PM

Our neighbors have a girl the same age as my dd and they are playmates. This girl comes over pretty regularly and I have chatted with her parents a few times. I kept meaning to have them over for dinner but always had an excuse. The house wasn't clean enough, we were tired that night, ect.
I'm sorry to say the girls mother passed away yesterday. She had been fighting cancer for some time.
The poor girl called here a little on the late side last night and asked if dd could come over. I would normally say no but my instinct told me to give her a few minutes.
When dd returned she was very quiet and she told me she had a secret. I asked her if she wanted to talk about this secret and she said yes but she promised she wouldn't. After a while she came to me and told me about the girls mother passing and said that her friend "shed a lot of tears". She asked what she could do to make her friend feel better and I told her she already did by coming over when she called.

While I didn't know the woman well it was hard not to show too much emotion to dd because I kept thinking about that sweet little girls who has lost her mom at only 9 yrs old. And I thought about what it might do to my girls if something where to happen to me.

I have also come to realize that I think I have an irrational fear of getting cancer. I have lost many people to it , including my best friend when I was only 13. People ask me why I decided to give up eating all animal products and I have a lot of answers but For me the big one that I haven't fully admitted to is because research shows they can litterly turn off the cancer gen by removing animal protein from the diet. I'm not typically a worry wart. I sorta lets things fall as they may but this one, the big C has got my attention. I am afraid of cancer.

**Spirit Deer** · 05-13-2011, 04:16 PM

I think we're all afraid of cancer.

I was assistant leader for my girls' Girl Scout troop when the leader, whose daughter was also in our troop, died of cancer after a long battle. The little girl was about the same age as your daughter's friend. It was difficult for any of us to know what to say or do to help the daughter cope.

You did the right thing, letting your daughter visit that evening. I'm sure you'll continue to allow your good instincts guide you.

**mauimagic** · 05-13-2011, 04:42 PM

How sad. What a wonderful friend your DD is and at such a young age to have such compassion. Sending prayers, hugs and aloha for all involved.

**Imarachne** · 05-13-2011, 07:35 PM

I'm scared of cancer too--my mother and father both died of it.

**monkeywrangler71** · 05-13-2011, 08:01 PM

I'm not so much scared of cancer, as I am just really, really sick of it. We've had a pretty much steady stream of cancer in our family for the past five or six years.

I don't want to scare you more, but I wouldn't put too much stock in that research. My cousin has been fighting colon cancer for the past year and a half, and she was a vegetarian for as long as I can remember.

**Debbie-cat** · 05-13-2011, 08:50 PM

What a horrible thing to happen. Your DD was wonderful in supporting her as she did....she was there when the little girl needed someone. I have had many friends and family die from this horrible disease already. Thankfully DH is in remission...for now. Cancer is scary and yes we should never take tomorrow for granted. Prayers and hugs to all involved.

**Dancing Lotus** · 05-13-2011, 09:28 PM

Originally Posted by monkeywrangler71

I'm not so much scared of cancer, as I am just really, really sick of it. We've had a pretty much steady stream of cancer in our family for the past five or six years.

I don't want to scare you more, but I wouldn't put too much stock in that research. My cousin has been fighting colon cancer for the past year and a half, and she was a vegetarian for as long as I can remember.

Vegetarian or vegan? Big difference.

**Daisygirl** · 05-13-2011, 09:57 PM

I'm so sorry to hear of the poor girl's loss. My daughters (10 and 15) just lost their father in March. This struck fear in me that if something happend to me that my girls would be orphans. It is so terrifying when things strike so close to home.

I'm glad your daughter was there for her friend. No one makes a grieving child feel better during a loss than a compassionate friend their own age, that I can tell you for sure. So many children don't want to be around a child who has lost a parent because they don't know what to say - you have raised a wonderful girl.

**heartofmine** · 05-13-2011, 11:06 PM

I'm glad the little girl has such a good friend in your daughter.

I had cancer 6 years ago and have been cancer free since January 10th 2005. I was told it could come back somewhere else. I can't let that fear control my life. Cancer took enough time from me and I won't let the fear of getting it again take any more time from me or my family. I live each day as a blessing from God...a gift.

**greekislandgirl** · 05-14-2011, 02:46 AM

(((HUGS))) You have raised a very compassionate little girl. My best friend's mother is fighting a very difficult stage 4 cancer fight and it is hard to know what to say but having been in the grieving position before I know that it doesn't matter so much what someone says as much as it does that I could tell they cared enough to be there. After I lost my sister I used to tell people "don't worry, you don't have to try to think of the right thing to say, just sit with me". When there's no "right thing to say" hugs go a loooong way. Also not just disappearing. Most of the people I knew vaporized when they found out. The ones who stayed, just seeing them around made me feel really cared for, even if they didn't say anything.