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Thread: Some people just don't get it
06-22-2011, 11:51 AM #1
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Some people just don't get it
I have a friend whom I shop with frequently. She hates to go alone and asks me to tag along. For years I have been silently watching her spending habits.
We go to the grocery store and her chart will be stuffed with everything you can imagine and her bill is typically over 300. She complains about the prices and claims that she shops the sales and still it's outrageous. Trust me, this girl does not shop the sales!
Finally after all this time she has noticed how much less I spend then her and I got to show her a few tricks. She was trilled with her savings. This sparked a conversation about budgeting and credit...
This person has every credit card ever offered. Literally to every store we have ever been too. She is way over her head in debit and has several cards enrolled in a consolidation program. Friday she was telling me about how she is now anti credit, paying them off is her number one priority.
ONE DAY LATER, she opened a new charge account.
We went to Kirklands and the girl opened a new account to charge over 300 dollars worth of knickknacks. We get in the car and she says to me " Awesome, I don't have to pay that for a month now. I still have money to spend today".
I'm at a loss for words.....
Honestly, it's her life and her husbands problem not mine but seriously.
I see her as a person who thinks that buying things will fix all her problems. I like to shop too but the satisfaction of the purchases is very short lived and the repercussion can go on and on.
Just thought some of you would get a good laugh
- 06-22-2011, 11:55 AM #2
You must have amazing self-control to be able to go with her and still stick to your own dreams and plans, I AM SO IMPRESSED!!! OH MY STARS!!
I actually have cut off a few ties with people that were doing JUST THAT, because I could not resist joining in the "fun" of the moment and got myself in a heap of trouble.
I know we can't blame others for our own actions but my will-power was zilch when I was with these people so I had to reign it in and stop going out with them. I can go out with my mom who is super-frugal and that's about it.
She will need you very soon for counseling on her situation! She is lucky to have you."If you can't see the light at the end of the tunnel, march down there and light it yourself."
Car loan (ugh, again!)
Husband's debt to work on, mine is gone except car loan. w00t!
Yah, I suck at this money stuff, I know. That's why I'm here.
06-22-2011, 11:56 AM #3
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My youngest is like that. I recycle soda cans and bottles and she asks me why do I do that. I told her I don't throw money away. Some people never learn.
06-22-2011, 11:56 AM #4
Hopefully some of your good habits rub off! My fav is when people complain they can't afford xyz. I tell them how they easily can and they say " Oh I could never do that!"
06-22-2011, 12:42 PM #5
06-22-2011, 12:48 PM #6
I know a few people like that in my life. The way I figure it, they're caught up in the game of trying to keep up with the Jones' and not dealing with a deeper emotional issue hence pacifying themselves with 'things'.
I agree, you're a strong person to not give in and go haywire spending like crazy along with her.2013: Year Two Of The Purge!
UPDATED: JULY 7/13
CHANGE JAR $???
COUPON SAVINGS + PRICE MATCH SAVINGS $327.98
06-22-2011, 12:51 PM #7
I give you a WHOLE HEAP of credit, Ann!
I would have opened my big mouth and asked her what the hell happened to her number one priority of paying all CC's off?
06-22-2011, 01:24 PM #8
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It's not as if I didn't want to tell her how stupid she was being but with this particular person it's best to keep my mouth shut. She is the sort to get angry enough to leave me there.
As for my will power, it helps when there isn't much in the store your interested it to begin with. I did have my eye on one thing and she kept probing me to buy it.Some days it's difficult to shop with her because I end up going home feeling deflated. Sure I'd like to buy all sorts of pretty things but in the end I won't feel good about for long. There was a time I would have been easily influence by this, I wised up.
06-22-2011, 01:27 PM #9
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06-22-2011, 02:38 PM #10
I have a good friend like that and she is not trying to keep up with the Jones she done passed them,she is a very nice person and she has a grarge sale every year and practly give stuff away and still have house full nice things and when i went with her shopping she would try get me to buy things didn't need and didn't even want so i just have an excuse when she ask me to go. Another friend of ours is jelouse of her spending that way i am not i fell sorry for her for i know she is like i us't to be searching for something but i finally found out the hard way( big cc bills)the new soon wares off and you need another shopping spree for a fix.2013 challanges
no spend challange=20 days a month
Grocery & hba budget challange=$200. a month
Jan. no spend days 26
Jan. Grocery & hba spent $101.35
Feb.no spend days=19
Feb.spend on grocery & hba=$141.86
March no spend days=20
March spend on grocery & hba $286.32
April no spend days=25
April spend on grocery & hba $118.75
May no spend days=20
May spend on grocery & hba =$157.42
June no spend days=22
June spend on grocery & hba=$173.78
July no spend days =22
July spend on grocery & hba =$183.31
August no spend days=20
August spend on grocery and hba=$188.96
Sept. no spend days=21
Sept.spend on grocery & hba =$177.01
Oct. no spend day=19
Oct.spend on grocery & hba =$273.34
Nov.no spend days =16
06-22-2011, 02:47 PM #11
I pick pennies up off the ground.Got rid of several "friend" shopping excursions that way.
06-22-2011, 09:03 PM #12
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A good laugh....well, maybe.......but only while I am thinking of someone similar that I know. Doesn't live in this area but when I see her or we talk.........she is doing the same thing.
Really sad......but to each his own........she is her hubby's problem....not mine........and there have been some problems.
Admire your patience.......but like you said....not your problem.
Just curious.........have you ever 'just casually' ask her why she thinks she needs all this stuff?.........or how she feels about her debt?
I will often not comment but always wonder what is making them 'tick' ...........why they feel they have to do the things.
06-22-2011, 09:35 PM #13
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Wow, unbelievable!! I don't think I could have kept my mouth shut.Dh Bob
DS (23) at Lakehead U - go Thunderwolves!
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06-22-2011, 10:06 PM #14
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If she had left me....I didn't need her anyway so it wouldn't have mattered.
Agree with the others. You tried to be a good friend. You tried to help. She either dosen't want help or isn't ready for it. You will probably be there to mentally pick her up when she falls. That's cause you're a good caring friend.Bank of America is THE godfather of Hell with Wells Fargo running neck and neck. When the world ends the only things that will be left are cockroaches, Walmart, Wells Fargo and Bank of America. Not necessarily in that order. The order remains to be seen.
Coupon Sales Challenge Oct
Coupons for Year / $390.35
$59.95 /Goal $300 Total
Groceries for Year
Eat Out No More Dec
No Spend Challenge
06-22-2011, 11:40 PM #15
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I don't think it's funny. It's just sad.
One thing I've noticed is every person seems to have something in their life that's out of control. For some, it's drinking. Some eat too much. Some spend too much. Nobody's perfect. We all have some kind of vice. It's always interesting to observe people who have a vice different than mine.~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Anything you cannot relinquish when it has outlived its usefulness possesses you.” -Mildred Lisette Norman
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