My Life is Becoming the "Maury Povich Show"

**mh3rdwheel** · 09-18-2011, 06:35 PM

Originally Posted by Daisygirl

Monkey wrangler:

The stuff is some old furniture he had gotten from the goodwill, some university text books from 20 years ago, some pots and pans, a set of dishes, sheets - that type of thing. There is nothing of any monetary value - we'd probably have to pay someone to pick it up.

Mh3rdwheel - Thank you - that is very nice of you to say.

I think that is the truth, the baby will be entitled to ss benefits, that is very important, yes she may want something of her dad's if he is proven to be the father, only when she gets older, my dad died when i was 3 1/2 yrs old, he died one day before jis 70th b-day. I don't remember him or eeven know 4 of my brothers and sisters, never met them, to this day i wish i knew them.

**Lynnwantstosave$$** · 09-18-2011, 08:13 PM

Daisy,
I've been on and off the boards depending on when my computer decides to work but from what iv'e read you and your girls sure have gone through a lot in regards to your ex. I just wanted to give your family a great big hug and say God Bless you all. I think you are a strong woman to be dealing with it all.

**Daisygirl** · 09-19-2011, 08:30 PM

I wanted to let everyone know, the girls have decided they want to know, one way or the other, if the baby is their sister.

I've maintained a decent relationship with M, so hopefully, if the baby is their sister, they can spend some time with her.

Thank you all very much for your input. You brought to light many things I had not thought of, and it really helped me to feel like I had covered all the bases when discussing it with them.

There is so much anger to undo, but maybe an innocent smiling baby girl can lead the way.

**ncarr** · 09-19-2011, 09:37 PM

good luck!

**Spirit Deer** · 09-19-2011, 09:49 PM

Good luck, Daisy.

I've been thinking about this situation a lot since you posted, and I've reached the conclusion it's not likely to go away. For that reason, I've changed my mind. Now I think you might as well have the test done and get it over with, so you know what you're dealing with. Otherwise, it would just hang over all of you forever.

I would, however, prepare your kids for the possibility that this baby might not end up being a big happy family with them. So much depends on M, and who really knows what her motivation is? Don't let them get their hopes up. It could end up just being another loss for them if reality doesn't live up to their fantasies and really, when does it?

It wouldn't hurt to consult an attorney and get some legal advice. An attorney might see problems in this situation that we lay people here on the boards have never even thought about.

**Missourimom** · 09-19-2011, 10:31 PM

Spirit Deer, I still don't understand why you think she needs to hire an attorney? She is not financially responsible for this child. I just don't understand your thinking. That would be like someone telling me I'm responsible for my ex husbands kids that he had with another woman.

**Missourimom** · 09-19-2011, 10:35 PM

Daisy, I think you and your daughters made a wonderful and wise decision. I agree that they should be prepared to discover the baby may not be their sister though. I'm also happy for the baby, even if she finds out your ex is not the father, that is at least one man taken out of the equation. It's so sad that the mother was unclear of who the father was. Certainly, some people should be using birth control.

**onencgirl** · 09-19-2011, 10:53 PM

I think the right decision was made.

**mh3rdwheel** · 09-19-2011, 11:43 PM

Daisygirl, WTG

I think that you and you DD made the right decision, at least this way you will finally know. I know a lot of us are waiting the answer on pins and needles.

Sorry I am just getting on fv, my internet was acting up for the last 3 hours.

**Spirit Deer** · 09-20-2011, 10:29 PM

Originally Posted by Missourimom

Spirit Deer, I still don't understand why you think she needs to hire an attorney? She is not financially responsible for this child. I just don't understand your thinking. That would be like someone telling me I'm responsible for my ex husbands kids that he had with another woman.

Exactly what I already stated:

An attorney might see problems in this situation that we lay people here on the boards have never even thought about.

**many houseapes** · 09-22-2011, 12:41 PM

Karen, just my opinion....Your in-laws have no say in your decision about the test. If the court doesn't order your daughters to submit a DNA sample,then the final say lies w/you whether or not to allow your girls to submit their samples. On the other hand, there is an innocent little girl that is caught in the middle of all of this, that is one day going to want to know who her father was. A test would put some questions to rest, no matter what the results are.