My ex's mom died

[erinalexmom]

My ex husband's mother died on Monday. I havent spoken to him in over 10 years but we were high school sweethearts. We had no children. Last year he contacted me about being my "friend" That he is sorry for all the things he did and everything. I told him I was happy now and I didnt want him to be a part of my life but that I forgive him and I wish him the best. Well, I was thinking of finding a nice card and just dropping it in the mail. I dont want to cause any problems for him and his new wife. I just wanted to send him some comfort. Since when we were teens I hung out at his house alot and I was of course her daughter in law for awhile. What are your feelings/thoughts? I am not going to viewing or funeral or anything I just wanted to give him a "thought" KWIM? I already talked to my own husband and he is honestly ok with whatever I decide to do because he knows its from my heart kindness, no "old feelings" or anything.

[OOwl]

I think I would send flowers to the funeral from both you and your husband to the memory of his mother. I don't think I'd send a personal card. I wouldn't want my husband to get a card from his ex-wife. Sorry for his loss.

[mauimagic]

Am so sorry to hear when anyone loses their mom. i would send an appropriate card to your ex and his wife, because she has lost someone dear to her also.

[erinalexmom]

The only thing with that mai is that I dont even know his wife at all. Would that be wierd to get a note from someone you dont know?

[erinalexmom]

Ok I discussed it again with my husband and we have decided to go with the flowers from both of us. I feel it shows kindness but also that my dh and I are a "united front" so to speak. Thanks for all the replies! I really wasnt sure what to do. Thanks for the idea OOwl
Thanks you also Maui

[ncarr]

I think the flowers from both of you is a very kind and appropriate gesture