Can you strangle a nasty patient? *Updated at end*

[SewCrafty]

I am ready to strangle Jack! He is the nastiest patient I have ever met!

About 2 weeks ago he was at his job at the bus garage and while walking, had to stop and hold himself up against a bus, his legs had gone completely numb and he couldn't walk. He went to the ER  (ALONE and never called me! ) They sent him home with some pain med and said see your doctor asap.

Within 2 days we were in to see his doctor. He gave him different pain meds and put him on a weird schedule of steroids to stop the inflammation. Plus he started seeing a physical therapist 3 times last week. They are all in agreement, his back is a mess!

Fast forward to last Monday I think, he was getting ready to go out and run some errands, I'm on the phone with my sis in Seattle while I'm snapping beans. All of a sudden there is a crash behind me, his legs went numb again and he fell down the last 3 stairs! Needless to say, I got off the phone and put canning on hold. He would NOT go to the ER or call his doctor's office!

Then the next day I am out picking berries, luckily close to the house. I hear him hollering for me, so I get on the back porch and say "Yeah, what do you need?" He is standing in the middle of the kitchen with his back to the door. He said "Come here please, I don't have any legs, I can't walk!" So I get him sat down in a chair and same senario, he won't go to the ER or call his doc. Now I am downright pi$$ed off!

So Thursday night we are having dinner and he says he had to get his laundry out of the dryer down cellar. I said I'll get it for you when I come back in from my walk. There is no rush for these clothes, he is in his sweats and not going anywhere! So after dinner I go out and take a walk in the yard, within 10-15 minutes he is on the back porch hollering for me again. I get back up to the house and he is shaking like a leaf! He just HAD to go down in the cellar for those clothes! Once again he twisted to close the door behind him at the top of the stairs and pinched something, lost the feeling in his legs and went down the stairs! He hit his head on the stone wall, did a somersault, hit his right cheek on the shelf with my laundry supplies on, scraped his right hip badly and cut his right palm. He crawled up the stairs on his hands and knees to get me.

You guessed it! NOPE, HE ISN'T GOING TO THE ER, HE HAS A DOCTOR'S APPT. TOMORROW! Now I am madder than a wet hen, but I'm not saying anything to him as he just won't go.

So I get him sat down in the living room after about 45 minutes in the kitchen chair and said let me bandage up your cuts. NO!!! Don't touch me!" Finally I said either I douse those cuts and scrapes with peroxide or you ARE going to the hospital! So he let me do that at least.

Now yesterday we go to his therapy appt. first. He has undone everything they did for him last week. She said he jammed 2 bones together in him lower spine. She was able to release them which took a lot of pressure off. Then iced his back for 20 minutes and did some ultrasound on him. Then she showed me how to relieve some of the tension so I can do it at home. He is supposed to have ice on his back 2 more times yesterday and 3 times today. So far he has let me do it 0 times!

We go get a bite to eat, then on to his doctor's appt. While waiting in the room for the doc. I said "Don't forget to tell him about the other 2 episodes with your legs going numb." He said he wasn't going to tell him as that was "past history" ! So the doc comes in and takes one look at him and says "What the hell did you do?" So Jack told him he fell down the cellar stairs and that his legs had gone numb the night before. So the doctor says what hospital has your xrays? Jack says none, why would I go to the hospital, I was seeing you today anyway. The doctor then called him stupid! Yeah DOC!!!!

He checked him out and was not pleased at ALL! Jack wasn't saying anything about the other episodes so I spoke up and told him and told him about the bump on his head and his hip. So he looked at those too while Jack is saying the hip is nothing, just a scrape. "No the doc says, you have a hematoma there, looks like a good amount of blood underneath the scrape. This makes a big difference in what I prescribe for you."

I then asked what could be done about his cheek, I mean you can't put a cast on his face? The doc said, "first of all it isn't his cheek bone it is his orbital something or other and if it is cracked it can affect his eye. This is the bone that holds the eyeball in place." The only way to repair it if it is cracked is plastic surgery.

Okay, now on to the back. When I told him about the other times his legs have gone numb he immediately didn't like that at all and said we are scheduling you for an MRI asap. We have an appt. for that on Tuesday.

We also went over to the hospital after the doctor's for many xrays of his head, cheek, neck and back. We hopefully will have the results on Monday afternoon of those to see if he broke anything. Oh I hope not!

We have 2 appt. next week with the therapist, the MRI, and see the doc again on Friday. Will probably be scheduling another therapist appt. as he wants him there 3 times a week.

On top of that my older sister Kathy had knee replacement surgery on Thursday, which I forgot all about. I spoke to her this morning and they have her up and walking but she is in a lot of pain. The nurse gave her more meds while we were on the phone so it was a short call. Mom said she is doing really well considering all her other medical problems. She has MS and a lung disease that restricts her breathing. So when she goes to a nursing home next week to recover and get physical therapy, I have to find time to go visit her too.

If Jack barks at me one more time I am going to let him have it, in pain or not!

Thanks for letting me vent, I am ready to explode and am thinking of ways to go outside in the rain just to get away from him.

[dolphin]

Oh Dee! You've had quite a time with Jack. My Dh doesn't take well to being a patient either so I do know some of what you're going through.

I'll keep Jack in my prayers and hope that all can be fixed on him and I will say a calming prayer for you and that he will let you start taking care of him and will listen to you.

Hope you get to see your sis soon.

Just big, big, hugs hon.

[homesteadmamma]

Men, you can't live with them and you can't live without them. At his age, they do get really.........never mind. Dh is the same way - drives me nuts. Its a wonder I haven't taken the frying pan to him sometimes. Now Dee, I'm not saying to do that.

All kidding aside, I do pray there isn't anything too serious and that the MRI comes back okay. I'm sending good thoughts your way. Please keep us updated as to how he is doing.

[SewCrafty]

Thanks ladies. I know he is in some really bad pain, so I am taking most of his nastiness with a grain of salt. Just getting to be a bit much today, that's all.

CJ, the frying pan sounds like something my mom would do! Not a bad idea! No, I won't do that. But it is why I'm upstairs on the computer instead of downstairs getting my many jobs done. I haven't done a thing today yet!

[Dixie]

Sounds like *you* need some major {{{hugs}}}. I'm praying for Jack.

[Darlene]

Aww Dee I so hope that old fart gets to feeling better & listens to you & the doc. Still have that card I sent? I told him then to listen. He can be so stubborn!!Show it to him again.

Hope he takes a nap soon and lets you do what you need to help him. I know he must be mad & frustrated at what's going on. I know it's not easy or fair that he's being such a pita but his body is like turning on him and he's feeling helpless to make it better & he hates that. Men like to have a handle on everything & do it all and when they can't watch out.
Sending you a big gigantic I'm sorry this is happening & wish it wasn't hug to you my friend. You guys have been through too much in the past year or so & this just bites the big one.

[guest2]

Dee

I'm so sorry that Jack is being so stubborn and not taking care of himself. He's lucky he didn't do more serious injury to himself falling down those stairs.

Praying that Jack will heal quickly and will not drive you totally batty in the process. If he gets any nastier, just call the doctor and see if he can perscribe some really good pain pills to knock him out for awhile! My hubby can sleep through anything when he is on certain pain meds.

[voodidit]

Dee men are always terrible patients aren't they! I almost feel worse for you then him..lol.

With my MS I get the leg problem sometimes, they just quit working, I actually have to think about it to get them to move.

Just give him a kick in the tail and take yourself a nice quiet bath!

[Guest1]

I didn't realize that all of your hubands were 32!! GW is the same way! If he had to carry his own head, he wouldn't take it to the Doc!!

Sorry Jack's being a putz Dee!!
Consider the source - a man in pain! Need I say more!! :insert whiney smilie:
Granted, this is a little more serious than a hangnail, but any injury beyond that is life or death - just not serious enough for an ER visit!
Never quite figured that out!
Serious enough to make us miserable over, but no need for a Doc?!

Anyway - I hope you can keep your spirits up & the frying pans down!!

[frugalmel]

Men can be so exasperating.

It seems when the Lord made them he forgot to put in the " gee honey, you are right, I should see a doctor or the ER to have that checked out" gene. But they have plenty of the beat on the chest (insert tarzan yell here) machismo.

[forestdale]

Sounds to me like he's very scared about what's happening to him. Poor boy. But having said that he still needs a good clip in the ear for being such a painful patient. Dee, I hope all goes well with his MRI and the treatment. I'm sending good thoughts your way my friend.

[halo475]

for you Dee and many healing thoughts for Jack!!

[Michelle]

Originally posted by Dixie
Sounds like *you* need some major {{{hugs}}}. I'm praying for Jack.

I hope the tests come back with nothing too serious

[Goodwin17]

Oh my, men can be such terrible patients. As a nurse, I see them all the time. My dad is one of the worst too and he's 51. Last week he had Salmonella, and he was so dehydrated and wouldn't drink anything. I thought I was going to have to take off to work, and drive 5 hours to where he lives to take care of him. Big to you, and I truly hope everything turns out ok and that he doesn't drive you totally nuts in the process. Saying a prayer

[SewCrafty]

Aw ladies, you are all the best!

I still haven't done much today, I escaped outside. First I picked apples and then I picked more berries! I don't have a clue why except it was nice and peaceful out there. I did stop and check on him frequently but all I got was a very curt, "I'm fine!"

Just before I went outside (at 2:15) I asked him if he remembered to take his noon pain pill. He bit my head off and said he just took it. I said no wonder you are hurting. To which he replied, no I just took my 3:15 pill. (nice and sarcastic like I'm a ) I said so, you bite my head off because YOU can't tell time? (as I'm pointing to the clock!) And I went outside! He hasn't spoken much to me since.

I know he is in pain but he won't let me help him. I would just as soon it be me, I have a much higher threshold for pain than he does. And I hate whiners! Him and my father are 2 peas in a pod.

The best one yet is, last night watching TV I said I was having pretty bad hot flashes, do you mind if I turn up the fan? (I haven't run the a/c all summer yet! ) He said go ahead I'm having bad hot flashes too! Ever since I started having them after my hysterectomy in 2001, he has hot flashes too. I told my doctor (gyn) and he laughed at him!