SAHMs - What is your biggest challenge?

[daddys3chicks]

- or frustration?

I think feeling like SAHMs are non-existant in society's view. People seem to think if you are a SAHM you are either a) dumb or b) rich. Well, I am neither, and neither are most of the SAHMs I know. I often get frustrated that parenting mags focus on how to balance work and home - and I know that is needed. But SAHMs need balance too and I often feel as if we are invisible.

I also feel like a rarity. There are a few SAHMs in our neighborhood, but not like when I was growing up. I really wish I had someone I could sit down and have a cup of coffee with sometimes.

Oh, and I am in NO way knocking WOHM or WAHM, I just think we all have challenges.

[Scattymum]

my biggest frustration is two of my SIL, they seem to think that I have nothing to do all day, that I can drop everything because they need me to do something for them, an example being today. SIL laptop has broken and DH is going to fix it for her - she rang up this morning to see what time i was coming to pick it up, um no I dont think I'm going todrop everything to drive an hour to pick up a laptop, I am obviously a lesser being because i dont work. they obviously think I just sit at home all day and drink coffee with friends ( which I do do sometimes)- it drives me mad!. Most of my friends are SAHM but we dont often meet up as we all have our own things to do. I have done both WOHM and SAHM and both jobs are demanding in there own ways

[psjkmom]

The hardest part of mothering for me is never having a moment to myself. Someone always needs something from me. That being said, I wouldn't change my life situation if you paid me. I like to say that I'm unemployed but not out of work!

[daddys3chicks]

Originally posted by psjkmom
The hardest part of mothering for me is never having a moment to myself. Someone always needs something from me. That being said, I wouldn't change my life situation if you paid me. I like to say that I'm unemployed but not out of work!

LOL! I always get on DH when he is teaching Sunday School and says "Okay, working moms..." I speak up and say - "Don't you mean the Mom's who work for pay????"

[pammy]

Agree with all. I'm neither dumb or rich. I get the 'it must be nice' eye rolled at me. I wanna poke their eyes! :p My family is making some sacrifices for me to be here.

And I think I'm busier now than when I worked. So when I get the same calls, the 'drop everything cause you don't work' calls, the get really miffed when I say that I'm busy. 'Busy? With what?', like I have nothing to do all day but eat bon bons and watch soap operas (both of which I don't care for, but the imagery fits, hehe).

So here's a cyber-cup of coffee to all my village friends, working or not working.

[Early Bird]

My greatest challenge is keeping up with the constant messes.

We homeschool, so we're always here, dragging out some project.

A house that's lived in never seems to get clean!

[Emerald_Mommy]

One of my challenges is cabin fever. If I'm in this tiny house (which I love by the way) with my two for several days in a row without leaving (only one car) I really feel the walls close in. Thankfully that doesn't happen often. Philip usually works at home too so I have another adult to talk with.

A secondary frustration is that crowd who thinks, as Cheryl mentioned, that because I stay home we're rich (not even close), uneducated (not hardly), or lazy (yeah right!). Oh well, most of the time I can ignore them but lately my youngest sister (17) has been the chief offender. She can insult me & my mom (stays home & homeschools) in one breath.

[mom22grls]

I get frustrated at "career day" at school. Why isn't it ever mentioned that being a wife and mother at home is a valid choice?
I love being at home with my kids. I wouldn't trade it for anything. I before Miss K was born, I thought being a housewife was great, too!
What about when people say...."Oh, I'd be *bored*"? BORED?????? I've never been *bored*.....I've not wanted to do what I am supposed to do & tried really hard to find something else more fun to do, but bored......never.

[Jellybeanz]

I've had times in my life where I've worked outside the home or went to college . College was the toughest. I eventually put it on the backburner because I just couldn't handle two small kids and driving an hour and half each way to school. Work was tough too.. my house pretty much didn't get any deep cleanings .LOL

But..... now I stay home. And although I have a small income I earn by working from home, I consider myself more a SAH person now. I gotta tell ya, I never have enough time. Days just FLY by. And I only devote about 5 - 10 hours a week to my parttime work. So I can't figure it out, but it seems like I'm busier than ever these days. ( I think I'm older and just more wore out too. lol) I used to run circles around what I can get done now.

As far as attitudes.. well very few people even know I work from home , everyone thinks I'm a SAHW ( Only have one college age son living at home now) and, I absolutely agree.. I get these looks when someone asks what I do and I say I'm at home. Like someone said, they either go " must be nice" or they act all superior.. BLAH......... Ya know what? Who cares...... Far as I know, they havent enriched my life financially, emotionally or in another other way, so there opinion doens't count.

I usually just say when they go "must be nice" - "Yep, sure is" and smile REAL big

It's a shame we are judged by whether we work or stay home. Both are choices that thank God, we are free to make in this country and both should have equal respect.

[Mumzy]

I used to struggle with the negative opinions. Perhaps I have reached the point that I am so seasoned that 'just like a duck I just let it roll off my back.'

To get to that point, I quit asking for outside opinions. I know why I am a SAHM. Further, it helps to ask yourself some easy questions. Does this person pay my bills? No. Is this person a family co-decision maker (for me it is dh) in the immediate family? No. Then what real power do they realy have over you? Think about how freeing that is!

Ok, so my personal big challenge as a SAHM is time management. I get sloppy when I stretch myself thin. For an example I know the holidays are comming so I make lists and plans on paper. Then get frusterated when it doesn't go as smoothly as I planned.

[MOMMYDEAREST]

I HAVE THE SAME CHALLENGES AS ALL OF YOU DO!!!!

[Renee-2kids]

Never getting anything finished completely. I get started and then a diaper needs changed, or a baby doll needs undressed or dressed, time for snack, clean up snack, read this book Mommy please, another dirty diaper, laundry needs attention, help finding a sippy cup, baby brother is messing up sister's stuff, another dirty diaper. Then I look around, it's time for dinner and I have 5 projects started and none finished.

I have a one year old and a 2 1/2 year old, both in diapers.

[hollyhill]

Oh Renee I remember those days.....Those toddler days which seem like years.......but it also true that the schoolage child's years seem like days.......

And Early Bird I hear ya.....

As a Homeschool mom, many mothers look at me with admiration or pity. LOL

Having worked as an Entomologist and as a TA, I never doubted my sense of worth or my descisions, in fact when I was on maternity leave with my first (and very COLICKY) baby I kept wondering when I would be able to have a coffeebreak. LOL I kept thinking this was SO much harder than working, at least after work I could go home.

After deciding to homeschool and so .......not to return to work....there have been many days that I felt that I have definately chosen the more difficult path!

My biggest challenge is MiL who feels I am wasting my abilities homeschooling my children........I can ignore most comments but it is hard to ignore someone who regularily comes and stays with you for DAYS at a time.....

[owiebrain]

1. Lack of sleep
2. Lack of time
3. Lack of extra hands
4. Lack of more MEs