Starting Out

[SAHMWannaBe]

I've never actually started my own thread before, and am in fact being very brave as I am new here, however I needed some advice and felt you ladies could help a girl out.

I've been married a year, well a year this coming Sunday. I have 3 stepkids (I don't know all the acronyms yet) one of whom lives with us. Because of the financial strain of keeping up two houses (we lived in my rented house while we tried to sell his house) we are having to move back into his house.

In the past year I've discovered several things. 6 packs of Ramen Noodles and two 12 packs of soda no longer get me through the week. Leftovers are a thing of the past and I never would have guessed how much toilet paper we would go through!

Ok, here is my point. I'm probably one of the biggest tomboys you've ever run across...now that I'm hitting 30 I've realized I need to settle down not just because its time, but because I need to for my family. Only I have no idea how to. I don't know how cook, shop, or live frugal or do any of the inspiring things that I've read about you ladies.

So how about some advice. I need to learn to sew, cook from scratch, live frugally. We are moving to his house which is out in the country so I can have a garden too (his mom is working with me on this). Any ideas or advice would be great. Especially things to help out financially.

Thanks in advance,

Mel

[guest32]

Welcome! You've certainly come to the right place

Your post made me giggle because I married a bachelar of 32 years when my girls were preteen...the poor guy got a quick education. On our first trip to the grocery store he picked up a hand basket (like he usually shopped) and I just looked at him and said "You're kidding, right?" And the second thing was he always wanted to know why we were out of toilet paper!!! Ummm.....girls, I explained.

Anyway...baby steps Mel. Start looking through some old threads on cooking and shopping and meal planning tips...ask tons of questions around here. Someone is always willing to jump in and help you out!

You'll catch on in no time, just don't try to tackle everything at once.

[FrugalMomof3]

Mel,

You've really come to the right place, this community is wonderful and if you have any questions or concerns... post them, there is ALWAYS a helping hand (or advice) just a click away.

I learned so much here and so will you!

~Tracy~

[SAHMWannaBe]

I feel sorry for him. Mandy (my stepdaughter) is a size 0 and literally eats as much as her 6'3 dad. I've been trying for a year to cook enough for leftovers but have yet to succeed.
The money thing gets me, man I didn't know that with 2 incomes we still wouldn't have any money! Just bills and trying to fix up his house so we can live in it....ugh, it's hard staying afloat.

The good news is Chuck will pretty much do what I ask (renovations on the house that is) so I'm able to get my flower and veggie gardens and he laughed when I told him I wanted chickens (he was raised on farm and my only chicken experience comes from when his mom gave me a baby chic whom I named "Mayday" and got ate by a chicken hawk. But not before I tamed him to jump up in my arms )

Mel

[slowtypinwoman]

It can be done,Mel!
Look through old threads and don't be afraid to ask questions when you need help. I was raised a city girl and now live on a small farmish type place. Although I no longer have chickens, I did keep them for a couple years.
The grocery bill is going to be one of the first things you attack. Coupon, shop loss leaders, comp. ads, and any and all things that will help you save at the store.
Don't get discouraged, even when you backslide. Which will happen a time or two, remember to give yourself small rewards.

Good Luck! It really is a fun adventure that can be so rewarding.

[my4littlebuffaloes]

Hi Mel,
If you can read, which obviously you can, then I feel that you can cook. Following directions in a cookbook is very easy to do. Just find a recipe you want to try and follow the steps. Mine have always turned out. 1 thing though, don't go running to the store to buy a bunch of specialty ingredients to fit the recipe you just found. Try to find recipes that use ingredients that you have on hand, or that you normally use anyway. Learning to cook from scratch will really help! Good luck!

Jennifer

[NoDebtMom]

You can do it! I suspect most of us had to get through that learning curve, but you just have to do it quicker with an instant family. I know I about drove my husband crazy with tuna casserole our first year married (only thing I could cook from scratch) Don't overwhelm yourself. Start with what is on sale, (if you eat meat, plan around the meat sales) Don't be afraid to try and experiment and don't get bogged down having every ingredient on hand, a lot can be improvised. Get online for recipes, if you don't have any cookbooks. A simple google search with what you have can yield a good recipe..... and it is trial and error. Once you get more experienced, it'll get easier. I love to open the fridge and cupboards and whip up a unique casserole or dish -- never would have thought I could do it 12 years ago.

[SAHMWannaBe]

I tend to start out good. I plan a menu, check for what I need, then head out to the grocery store. That's when problems arise. I walk into the store, ready for war... I get out my pen, get out my list, and psych myself up (I hate shopping, my mom says I'm "shopping challenged"). Down into the veggies, I'm ok here down the bread row..."Oh, isn't that a pretty package" Allright, focus Mel.
The real problems occur when I'm trying to figure out what product is more cost effective this can is bigger that one is less expensive... I end up giving up, grabbing most of what I need and arriving home one or two items short for my recipes while spending $130 for a week and a half worth of groceries for family of three.
Then I'll try and stick to my menu, but that will last like 3 days.....It's an endless cycle. I guess I just need to be more determined and stay focused. I saw where someone posted that they spent $125 a month in groceries for a family of four and I just don't see how its done! I'm in awe. Between meals and snacks how is it done?
Guess maybe if I made more stuff from scratch, but Chuck and Mandy always make faces and wait for the buring smells to erupt.

Mel

[ecgsmama]

I spend about $145 a month on groceries for a family of five. Here is how I do it -

I’m creative – My husband is very cooperative and accepting of my cooking, but I know he despises chicken. Of course, chicken is the cheapest meat out there. So I hide it in casseroles and homemade hot pockets, which I know he enjoys.

I make it from scratch – try something new from scratch every week. My husband loves Stromboli, but the only time he would have it was when we ordered out from the pizza place. With our new goal, there is NO room for eating out in the budget, so now I make it from home. I still use frozen bread dough though, but as time and commitments allow I’ll even try to make that from scratch.

I also think simple- simple ingredients and simple meals. My family’s favorite meal is mac and cheese with hot dogs and peas for a side. With everything bought on sale or as a loss leader, this meal runs me a little over $2.00.

I only buy two beverages (besides formula) – milk and juice (100% and only when it is on sale.)

I stick to it – No matter what it is – a shopping list, meal planning, using up leftovers, etc. I find the biggest problem is a lack of discipline. If you are truly committed to a goal – stick to it and persevere - even when you are sick and tired of spaghetti, especially without parmesan cheese!

[Vannie]

Hi Mel

Living in one house will cut down expenses tremendously. Learning to use coupons is a good way to start saving money on the you use and need. And learning to cook simple meals is not difficult, it just takes a little time. Many times you will find recipes on the backs of the products you buy. Don't be afraid to try them out. I think when you learn to garden, learning to cook more things will be a natural next step. Also, you sound like you have a great sense of humor, that helps when learning to cook. Between meal snacks; fruit, cut up veggies, Jello?

Oh, and don't rule Ramen noodles out--just toss some sweet peas in them and you have a great lunch

By the way how old is Mandy? Just curious.

[ecgsmama]

Sorry, I also wanted to add. I, too, used to get frustrated not knowing whether I was getting the best possible deal or not. A lot of people advocate a price book to track prices at different stores and in different quantities, etc.

With three small children this has proved almost impossible for me to complete. However, because I have shifted to cooking from scratch from simple ingredients, I have been able to track the price of these few simple ingredients. So now I am able to tell when I am getting a good deal on oatmeal or not.

Is there still probably a better deal lurking elsewhere, say in bulk, probably....but I'm OK with that, I still know I got a better deal than someone just walking in a buying whatever they need(a.k.a want)

[leeleeaub]

Some great ideas here. I am still learning and hope to do even better the next time I go to the grocery store. I love the idea of "hiding" chicken hehe

[SAHMWannaBe]

Wow, you guys are giving some wonderful advice! Thank you. Mandy and Chuck will definately be appreciative too. (She is 12 by the way Vannie).
We hope to be in his house by the end of next week and figured that that alone will save us about 400 a month (which we are very excited about).
The house has about an acre and a half besides chickens and a veggie garden what else can I do?
One problem I've always had is time. I teach school and tend to stay hectic. How do ya'll manage to do all this from scratch?

Mel

[Hollyhandi]

Once a Month Cooking then freezing meals to heat on hectic nights.
I also make up pancakes, biscuits, muffins, cookies, pies and put in freezer.
My family loves spanish rice so i make 2 one to eat one for freezer fo later in the month, also scalloped potatoes, mac and cheese with chunks of ham. Other casseroles...
You'll learn and do great.

[SAHMWannaBe]

wow those are great ideas. I buy frozen biscuits at the store, could I make home-made ones, cut them out and freeze them myself?

Mel