Saying hello and some stuff about me (kinda long)

**beachie** · 04-19-2006, 12:55 PM

Hi Everyone,
I am new here, been lurking awhile. After this last week I decided to try to start posting (Im a chicken).
My husband and I have had a very rough time the last few years, both emotionally and financially. I filed for divorce last year and now we are trying to work things out.
Today is a big day for me and I wanted to share it. We have had a house on the market for over a year (not living in it) and we are closing today. I have been living with my mil since june (in 1 room with both my kids)and have been stressing with maintaining and paying for this house the whole time, including when we were separated and my husband wasnt giving me money. (I was a sahm). Our cc debt is around 28k now. I dreamed of owning a house and for the 10 years before we had kids I had a great job, worked hard, was always very frugal and never kept cc balances, built our savings and saved our for homes. Everything just went out control, my life fell apart. I moved across the country found out my husband lied, cheated on me ect, ect. Along with losing my dreams, marriage and hope, I also have lost our home. We will only be getting $4300. after closing today (at least I dont have to pay!). Im too embarrased to tell you the amount of $$$ lost on this house. Its just unbelievable. But I am grateful to be out of the resposibility of the mortagage. At the same time, Im very sad as we are in a very expensive market now and I dont see ever being able to buy another home. I know Ill be ok and its not the most important thing, but I feel like such a stupid failure sometimes. Hindsite is 20/20, If I knew what was gonna happen I would have made different choices, maybe a different husband....
Anyway, I have learned alot along the way, I have 2 beautiful girls, we are healthy, have a place to live and I have some hope again.
So, I was getting really excited because now I can really start taking steps to rebuild. I feel like some of the chains are being lifted. I made a list of our debts and started making a spending plan and tried to talk to my husband and he took the wind right out of my sails. He could care less, its the same old thing of me taking care of everything and him never changing (he's stopped his counseling). Ugg. I felt so sad and so alone. Ive been alone for longer than I want to admit, I dont have a partner. I was wishing I had someone to share the excitment of getting back on track, so I thought I should post here and maybe try to make some friends who think like me. Today is HUGE!! Called and cancelled the homeowners ins., I cant wait to delete all the bills from my bill pay!
The real estate agent just called, the closing is finished, all went fine and I officially no longer own the house. WOW! It feels good. Sad and good and thats allright.
Well this was long and boring for sure. Thanks for reading if you made it this far. I realize its up to me to make my life better and find support. Im sure glad I found this site and hope to get to know some of you, your posts are amazing.

**tbs727** · 04-19-2006, 01:41 PM

Welcome, Beachie. It sounds like you have been on quite a journey. I'm so sorry about your husband, and I'm glad things are looking up for you. I can't offer any advise, but I wish you the very best. The ladies here in the village are great people and will help you through your hard times.

**Darlene** · 04-19-2006, 01:48 PM

Whole new wonderful adventure ahead for you Beachie. Welcome & I just know your on your way to good things.

**nodmicks** · 04-19-2006, 02:00 PM

Welcome Beachie! May your days get better and brighter from here on!!!!!!!

**tulipgraham** · 04-19-2006, 02:07 PM

Hello and welcome!

Thanks for sharing - Things always get better!

**AmyBoz** · 04-19-2006, 02:17 PM

Welcome, Beachie! The horizon is looking bright for you! I can't wait to share in your journey!

**NoDebtMom** · 04-19-2006, 02:36 PM

Welcome Beachie. Hang in there. This is a great place to find support.

**freedeal** · 04-19-2006, 03:06 PM

Welcome. We all celebrate this next chapter with you. Wishing you the best.

**midwestgal** · 04-19-2006, 03:40 PM

Welcome! You are not alone in your struggles! Many have experienced the same. Never be ashamed of where you are in life. There is always hope!

**slowtypinwoman** · 04-19-2006, 04:46 PM

Welcome! you have found a place to leard many things and make new friends.

**joyb** · 04-19-2006, 06:12 PM

Welcome, Beachie. Hold your head high, Honey. You said it, you and your children are healthy and together. You are going to have happier days ahead. Glad you are here.

**Mom23boys** · 04-19-2006, 06:26 PM

Hello and welcome.

**PrairieRose** · 04-19-2006, 08:06 PM

Better days ahead Beachie....

Welcome to the village and hope you can learn some and teach us some as well.

**suzysaver** · 04-19-2006, 09:17 PM

Welcome

**miss_thrifty** · 04-20-2006, 01:07 AM

Beachie, I know the road was long, and winding through life, but look upaheadthe wild flowers are waiting for you and new experiences.

this saying i love below:

" My soul is the land on which my house is built. There shall be no tresspassing, looting, pillaging, or plundering on this, my land. ---Sylvia Browne