need opinion quickly pease

**northernmom2boys** · 09-28-2006, 03:46 PM

OK my youngest son is 5,one of his friends in his class wants him to go for a sleepover.I know these people cause their daughter has been in my older sons class since kindergarten ,so going on 5 years.Im not sure if I should let him go,isnt he too young?Maybe Im being overprotected
HELP!!!!!!!!!!

**baxjul** · 09-28-2006, 03:56 PM

My dd is six, she has been going on sleep overs for about one year now. As long as you know the parents, and trust them, it should be okay!

**my4littlebuffaloes** · 09-28-2006, 04:07 PM

I think it is too young. My ds just had his first sleep over this summer at the age of 8. I plan on waiting just as long, or longer if I can for the rest of my kids. Kids these days are way too influenced by their peers, when they need to be mostly influenced by their parents. Sleepovers are just one of the ways that peers take over influence. Which just creates problems for everyone if you ask me.

As you can tell I am pretty opinionated on this subject, but I only became so after my ds completely turned against his family for his friends and we have been fighting for almost 2 years to get him back.

Jennifer

**northernmom2boys** · 09-28-2006, 04:26 PM

I am so torn because he is so excited about it,I guess they have been talking about it at school all week.I like having my kids all under the same roof at night,I dont even feel well at ease when they go to my mil for the night lol

**MirandaK** · 09-28-2006, 04:30 PM

I think that's pretty young too! I bet 1/2 of those kids parents get a middle of the night phone call. Maybe let him stay until midnight or something then go pick him up. That's still got to be a pretty big deal if you are 5.

MK

**PrairieRose** · 09-28-2006, 04:44 PM

I think that if you know the parents and trust them it should be ok. Jmho.

**baxjul** · 09-28-2006, 05:22 PM

Maybe you could have the sleepover at your house. I've done that with my dd also, and the kids love it! We make english muffin pizzas, and ice cream sundaes. Just an idea!

**momof42003** · 09-28-2006, 05:28 PM

I have four kids and all but the littlest were invited for their first sleep over at about age five... None of them had issues with it.. I have NEVER had any of them call in the middle of the night wanting to come home... If you think your son is emotionally prepared to be away from home, and you know and trust the parents, I say why not?? So what if he does call you, you will know next time that he may not be ready yet and wait a few months (six or so) or more for the next sleep over. Maybe that one can be at your house instead... Just my two cents..

**PennyPinchinPam** · 09-28-2006, 05:31 PM

I'm wary of sleepovers too. My dd is 5 yo and I would not let her sleep over. I'm very protective too but there are lots of crazy people out there that appear normal in public. It's the behind closed doors that worries me.

**MOMMYDEAREST** · 09-28-2006, 07:16 PM

my ds is 6 yrs old & hes super attached to me. hes in the 1st grade & i know for a fact he wouldn't want to go to a sleepover. i think 6 is kinda young still. just explain to him that you think its not a good time & maybe sometime in the future. you are the parent, i'm sure he'll understand (he probably won't be happy......lol). parenting is sooooooo hard!!!!!!

**northernmom2boys** · 09-28-2006, 07:49 PM

I really dont see the purpose of a sleepover in the first place .I dont want to have the responsibility of another persons child in my care overnight .I really had wished they had come to me fisrt instead of letting the kids make plans ,now if I dont want him to go Im the mean one cause Im the last to know.

**northernmom2boys** · 09-28-2006, 07:50 PM

Oh and my dh thinks its fine and I need to let him go,what do men know lol
Its 730 and she hasnt called yet so maybe plans have changed

**Neeley** · 09-28-2006, 08:09 PM

Both of my kids (now ages 13 and 11) have been sleeping over at their friends since one was 4 and the other was 5. Never had a problem. As long as you know the family and you are comfortable with them. I believe sleepovers are a great way for kids to bond and develop their friendships. In class, in sports, or other organized activitites there is not enough time for them to just play and be kids.
In the end do what you feel is best for your stiuation. This is just my opinion and experience. I know you will decide what is right for you.

**northernmom2boys** · 09-28-2006, 09:19 PM

Thank you all for your help.I know I need to go with my gut and do what I feel is right.Im not comfortable with him going overnight right now,maybe next year lol or when hes 30 lol

**kabin63** · 09-28-2006, 11:05 PM

I think it just depends on the kid. My DD couldn't spend the night at a friend's house till this year. She just hit 7th grade. She would try and try and ultimately I would go pick her up around 11:00 pm. I didn't scold her, just reassured her that eventually she would stay and she did. At the age of 5 it would have never worked for her, but if you have a child that is pretty secure then maybe it would work.
I do agree that you are the parent and what you say goes. Sometimes kids don't really want to go either and they want to know the boundries. You know your child better than anyone. In your heart if you think it's too soon then you have to follow your instincts.