Whats the RIGHT thing to do?

**Libby** · 01-01-2007, 08:42 PM

Ladies,

I know in the past when I had made my decision to finally leave my horrible nasty now ex bf I turned my girls for some sound support and advice. I am back again...for those of you who know me through here you'll recall all the probs I had with my ex's mother (as well as the ex). She died today.

My dilemma - what do I do? Should I just send a polite email to send my condolences or a quick phone call? Should I send a card in the mail? I do not want to attend the funeral services nor see my ex again if possible....Im not ready to tackle the potential of being friends again just yet. He just started dating someone again since we our break up back in aug/sept.

(for those of you that dont know - I shut my ex out completely he was bordering on stalker status and was on alert with the police. I learned this information through the grapevine as we still have mutual friends.)

In your opnion, whats the RIGHT thing to do?

**cheappearls** · 01-01-2007, 08:45 PM

While it's sad, I would do nothing.

**MOMMYDEAREST** · 01-01-2007, 08:51 PM

yes i agree with cheappearls.........i would keep my distance & say a little prayer!!

**PAVallygrl** · 01-01-2007, 08:56 PM

Yep, have to agree.......Do nothing, no email, no phone call, no card. Getting on with your life means GETTING on with your life!

**dcompton** · 01-01-2007, 09:08 PM

I'm with them. Do nothing. He's no longer part of your life.

**Buckeye5** · 01-01-2007, 09:10 PM

While you may feel bad, I would do absolutely nothing. You have to protect yourself first.

**thrifty gal** · 01-01-2007, 10:47 PM

I agree with the rest. Hugs!

**marei** · 01-01-2007, 11:12 PM

I agree with all of the above, say a prayer if you feel so inclined and do nothing, never let it be interpreted that you opened a door.

**PrairieRose** · 01-01-2007, 11:24 PM

I agree. If you do anything it will be too much.

**oklahomapoet** · 01-02-2007, 03:12 AM

I am in full agreement. Do nothing.

**Darlene** · 01-02-2007, 08:32 AM

My first thought was that if there is someone in the family, def not your ex ,that would be comforted by your card then I'd send it to them personally, no return addy.
But on second thought, moving on without regret sounds like a nice plan.

I suppose saying ding dong the witch is dead would be inappropriate... Sorry, but I do find some comfort when certain things happen to nasty people.

How ya doing Shorty?

**favesis37** · 01-02-2007, 08:35 AM

i agree, nothing , no need to take a chance he will take it the wrong way.

Jo · 01-02-2007, 08:48 AM

I'm new here, so I don't know your WHOLE story.....but I agree with favesis. He could take any communication the wrong way, and you're going back to square one. By contacting him or his family, you are extending the "olive branch"...then it'll come back to haunt you when you need to get the authorities involved, since YOU were the one to initiate contact.

**Hollyhandi** · 01-02-2007, 09:29 AM

Shorty,
Glad to hear from you.
I agree with the others don't do anything as it would send the wrong message. He's moved on so let him keep moving. (Protect youself first )