I feel sad about this

**Jayne** · 05-11-2007, 05:00 PM

I didn't know where to post this so I put it here....As I have said I do Angel Food Ministries at our church, well one Friday out of the month I am there to take orders from people...Today was that Friday...I was there alone, and this big, really big guy comes in asking to speak to a Pastor....I said he is not in...so he says can I talk to you and I said of course...welll he goes on to show me pics of his kids and has afolder full of papers stelling of his misfortune hes going through...hes is sweating heavy and shaking and by this time I am getting alittle un-easy to say the least...

So he gets to the point that he needs money...all I have is a five and I gladly gave it to him and said that we could also get him some food for free...he excepted this glady, and I told him to come back on Sunday for the food and that he should call to see when Pastor would be back...so he left ..and I locked the door and only let in Angel Food customers(I know most of my customers)....The thing is I feel bad because it is so hard to trust people these days...You want to give them the benefit of the doubt but how do you know if they are legit????....KWIM?????

**itsahumanzoo** · 05-11-2007, 05:05 PM

I know what you mean. We always want to give what we can to people who are less fortunate. But it's hard these days to tell who is genuine. I think you did the right thing.

**annymoll** · 05-11-2007, 05:12 PM

If he was shaking and sweating my first thought would be that he needed some booze.You are very kind. I would not have been so tender.

**kimmie** · 05-11-2007, 06:08 PM

God only calls us to do our part. Once we give, what they do with it is between them and Him.

You did good.

**FrugalMomof3** · 05-11-2007, 06:08 PM

I think yo uare very kind and you did the right thing, it's a shame that there are people out there who are very USING of the system and lie to get their way, which makes us generalize and be scared of those who genuinely need our help but we feel unsafe or unsure. Keep your head up, you did fine

**geckoace** · 05-11-2007, 06:29 PM

Do not feel sad you helped him the best you could, the shaking and sweating is probably an indication of something else going on, something not so good. we can only do what we can do and you are wise to be leery of people, not everyone has your best interests at heart

**kaykwilts** · 05-11-2007, 07:30 PM

I don't blame you for being uneasy. You never know what people are capable of doing.

**miss_thrifty** · 05-11-2007, 07:44 PM

you did very good. sometimes i gave money to the drunks in Toronto or the odd drug addict because it was scary situations at time and didnt know what to expect from them. not very much , a few dollars or sometimes i gave the odd homeless person or woman with children free meals. Its not easy to look and know that person was apart of our society and probably had something happen to them drastically. some just give up on life and dont know how to get back.
I always try to remember that each person was someones child at one time and you never know what little difference we can make in someones life.

**dcompton** · 05-11-2007, 09:19 PM

It's really hard to know what to do in these situations. I turned down a panhandler in a shopping center parking lot a few days ago, and felt bad all the way home. Sometimes I do give, sometimes I don't. You are right -- it's hard to be trusting. But even if they are what society would sometimes think "not deserving," life is hard and compassion is in order, no matter what the circumstances. On the other hand, I think you were definitely justified in being cautious when you were alone and seeing that he would not be able to return while you were.

**nwmissourigal** · 05-11-2007, 10:55 PM

You did the right thing. One Sunday when our church was in service, we had a couple stop at the church and they had 3 small children. They asked if our church could spare some money for food and gas. Our church did give them some money from the offering, but I know in the back of my mind, I was wondering how many other churches they had been to that Sunday and if was a normal Sunday outting for them. I didn't want to thing that way, but I couldn't help. I did ask for forgiveness for thinking that way, but you never know what people are up to. God tells us to give to the poor and to love them. So our church did the right thing, just like you did. I am just glad that you are safe and nothing else happened...Blessings..Kathy

**GMA21** · 05-12-2007, 02:56 PM

You did the right thing, after all it is better to give. I turned away someone once & I still get bothered by that still to this day even though it has been many years later. Now I always give in some way. We don't know for sure why he was sweating & shaking it could of been for a number of reasons & it isn't for us to judge anyone. If it were a loved one who fell on hard times & went for help I would hope that they would receive it instead of being turned away.

**autumnlynn** · 05-12-2007, 03:11 PM

I agree it's great to give, but we have to keep ourselves safe, too. Once I was at work (in a doctor's office) and this young man came in. I was there by myself. He asked for drugs. I told him to wait up front and I ran out the back door. After that I always keep the door locked if I am alone. It's sad, but we have to keep safe.

When I ran out the back door I went to another doctor's office across the hall and they called the police. The guy's eyes were red and he looked really wild. I will never forget that.

**Dancing Lotus** · 05-12-2007, 05:44 PM

You were kind and you told him the apropriate way to get help. That is the best I would expect you to do.

**missymomof3** · 05-13-2007, 08:17 AM

Originally Posted by kimmie

God only calls us to do our part. Once we give, what they do with it is between them and Him.

You did good.

I agree, well said!

**Lady_V** · 05-13-2007, 09:27 AM

You helped him, and what he did with it effects HIS Karma... your giving will come back to you when you least expect it and need it the most.

As far as sweating and shaking... it is spring, the weather has been warmer, you said he was a big guy... maybe it was nerves or, humility. It isn't easy asking for help, and more so if you are male... it means you 'can't provide for the family'

You may see him back again, you may not. Only he knows if he was telling the truth.