Anyone else hate clothes shopping for themselves?

**mommy4ever** · 07-19-2007, 03:42 PM

I'm so frustrated. I feel old, dumpy and frumpy! I understand body shapes change, I've had 4 9lb+ babies, I couldn't expect to remain a size 4 forever. I never expected to stay 115lbs forever either. I'm ok with that. But I'm 33, I shouldn't feel or look that way

My design instructor is 65 and looks awesome, not old and frumpy, so I shouldn't either!

But I'm not ok with the fact that they don't make clothes for REAL people! I've gone shopping so many times and returned home nearly in tears with NOTHING to show for the day spent.

I'm a real person! I'm not an anomoly of nature, I've got hips AND a waist. Expecting moms to wear low-rise pants is insane. How many tummies remain nice and taught and unmarred by stretch marks(yes there are some lucky ladies out there) after child birth? Why are any cute t-shirts always SO short or SO long. Is there no happy medium?

My current wardrobe is comprised of 2 pairs of jeans that I no longer fit, 1 pairs of ill fitting capris(too wide at the waist). 2 winter weight blouses, 1 pair of dress pants(not a bad fit, I think I need to try again and see), 1 cute top(I do like it!) and a handful of ill fitting, over sized t-shirts, most have stains, and are ready for the rag bin. It's time to go shopping and I'm DREADING IT!! I hate going so I've been getting whatever, and MIL keeps giving me hand me down t-shirts but she's twice my size. I really don't have much.

I did start doing research. I want to be able to build a wardrobe that I can wear. But I'm a childcare provider, so I don't have need for a professional wardrobe, and minimal need for any evening attire. We're invited to our first wedding in 10 years, so I really don't need more than 1.

I've watched What not to Wear in hopes of gleaning info. But have had a hard time using the info. There does seem to be some contradictions from show to show, and I know everyone is different so the "rules" do vary some. But some of those poor people end up with illfitting clothing too. So it didn't help much.

So still dreading the shopping thing, I did more research, what's hot for moms in fashion? I have no idea. But I found this website(disclaimer, I'm in no way affiliated, just very happy with what I found). www.missussmartypants.com it is awesome! For a few weeks I was on their newsletter. Then having had to throw more clothes out(holes in them) and having less and less to wear making a shopping trip inevitable in the near future, I did purchase a membership(I did sell something on ebay to pay for it..lol). And this week, I got my membership, access to a months worth of newsletters and today a new one. So 5 weeks so far. I'm much better equipped. I LOVE how she had put everyone in different categories, and name each one in a positive manner. I'm in the "c" group. This is for those that have the pear shape. She calls it cute curves..lol. NOw I feel better about havin a cute curvy shape than a pear shape....wouldn't you?

I've learned what colors to chose for myself, which I can get away, and which to avoid. this week the newsletter discussed co-ordinating a wardrobe to maximize the flexibility of your clothes. How to use colors, how many colors should you focus on. All as a way to be efficient and frugal.

I'm learned what shapes suit me! How to balance out my shape.
Today we were out, and I found 2 new sweaters for fall. Both of them aren't something I'd have considered before. Only is a beautiful olive with a nice v-neck, there are buttons on the v with some faux button hows(details draw the eyes up and away from the "problem areas"). The toher is a chocolate brown with fancy cut outs at the neckline. Both are colors I've never chosen, but armed with a color chart, and trying things one, I could see the difference! Blue makes me look highly anemic(yeah I AM anemic, but not that bad), the olive and brown, I glow, look like I might even have a tan..lol. The dark circles aren't as apparent.

I also found out, that pants are never going to fit my bottom half right. I've been blessed with childbearing hips, and have pelvic spread, heavier legs. So in order to accomodate those thighs and hips, I do need to get a bigger size and have them altered. SO....I'm going to have to suck it up and get a set or two altered so I can figure out how to do it myself. I'm going to look and see if there's a course locally to learn how to do it, I've 4 kids all with fitting issues already, so alterations would be a good thing to have learned. But at least I KNOW.

So, if anyone else if beating their head against a brick wall while shopping, check out the site. I'm not feeling as nervous about shopping. I've made notes, printed my color chart and have it all in my purse for easy reference. Hopefully, next week I can hit the consignment and thrift stores and get a few good basics for my closet!

**leezza** · 07-19-2007, 04:13 PM

I don't have children but I understand what you are talking about.....and I also don't know what size you are but I have found some nice everday shirts at, Just My Size, on the internet www.jms.com

When I do find a shirt I like I get every color they have that looks good on me. I also check out the site every few weeks to see if they are having any good sales.

Good Luck,
leezza

**baxjul** · 07-19-2007, 04:18 PM

YES!!!! I'm not overly fat, but I'm not thin either! I have to go jean shopping tomorrow! Horror of horrors!!!

**Luv2BeFrugal** · 07-19-2007, 05:06 PM

I HATE HATE HATE clothes shopping. I'm tall and can never find pants long enough...have broad shoulders...long arms...and I'm not thin (wear a 14). It's awful. I dread it. And up here we don't have many stores to chose from (though it is getting better...over the last 5 years or so).

**Edna_E** · 07-19-2007, 05:19 PM

Me too. My pet peeve is regarding length of garments. The average height of women is somewhere around 4" taller than it was 50 years ago, but they still make most womens's clothes for people who are about 5'5" as far as I can tell. Why hasn't the length of pants (normal, full-length ones, not cropped styles) been extended to an inseam that works for most 5'7" women? Why are shirt sleeves and waists designed that way? If the stats are correct, why are there not MANY more tall women's clothing sites/catalogs/departments and how do we distinguish between 5'8or9" tall and 6' tall?

**mommy4ever** · 07-19-2007, 05:24 PM

Well, I'm UNDER average height, and have issues finding long enough shirts..lol. most semi-fitted t-shirts are too short. loose ones are too long. It's a losing situation

But there's no 2 ways around it, western Canada is too cold to become nudists,so while it would be frugal, it wouldn't be practical..lol.. so I'm going to have to buy clothes again!

**momof2inpa** · 07-19-2007, 05:33 PM

I so agree about hating clothes shopping! With my height and the size of my hips and dunlap (you know my stomach dun lapped my jeans- or muffin top)- thanks to my 2 girls! My clothes don't really fit me right anymore either (either too big or small)- I have to get them altered as well!

Even though I really can't afford their clothes- I like the Land's End website. You can build a virtual model of yourself and "try" different style of clothes on yourself (that really came in handy during swimsuit season- not too many tears were shed when trying them on!)! It is nice since they have alot of the basic cut styles that are out there and you can somewhat see what style would look decent on yourself!

**JanieD** · 07-19-2007, 05:53 PM

I totally with everyone... HATE shopping for clothes.

I'm small, almost petite but I'm long waisted. Nothing seems to fit right to tight here to loose there. If I find something that fits, I buy it... sometimes its not on sale.

Can't believe the styles now... wouldn't be comfortable wearing most of it! I have broken down & bought several of the long tees. They're OK but cut slimmer than I would like... just had to have some new shirts though. So happy to see longer shorts finally after the short shorts year after year. And don't get me started on capris... high waters on me unless I can roll/adjust the length.

Really wish someone would come out with a line for women who want comfort & style at a reasonable price.

**sdrjeolsen** · 07-19-2007, 07:34 PM

Thanks for the website, I'm going to check it out. I HATE clothes shopping. I can never find things that fit right and come home crying and depressed. I'm a size 14 but built like a boy, no hips and or waist and a small butt, pretty much straight up and down from chest to hips. I hate to even admit it, but I have resorted to shopping in the guys section for jeans and kakhis, I just can't find anything that fits even remotely close in women's. I pretty much wear jeans and t-shirts everywhere, makes me feel frumpy and old too.

**starsapphire** · 07-19-2007, 08:45 PM

I agree. Alot of what I seem to find is for teenyboppers or to the other extreme, too matronly or frumpy. Its hard to find clothing that fits good, looks nice and is not on either end of the spectrum.

**lullaby80** · 07-19-2007, 08:52 PM

Me me me!! Guess how many times people have asked when I was due? NEVER!! I'm "apple" shaped, meaning I have a big belly so nothing fits. If I wear jeans with a regular waist, I look like a grandma (sorry

) and if they are low waist, I too get the muffin top (omg I almost peed my pants when I read this - too funny) or look more like a mushroom and the pants end up falling off. Haven't found a nice place to shop at yet, just the idea of trying soemthing on depressed the heck out of me. I have two pairs of jeans and one pair of capris and maybe 5 shirts that fit. I'm really hoping they'll last me another year or two.

**Radish4ever** · 07-19-2007, 08:59 PM

I'm there with you! It is SOOOOO hard to find decent pants! I'm 5'3" and wear a 14 or something around there - but i have chicken legs! The big size is for the big waist! I end up with a huge roll hanging down in almost all pants. bLah!

**pkellyc** · 07-19-2007, 09:06 PM

Short at 5'3", larger bust (C cup), slim hips, no rear to speak of, thin arms and legs. Oh, and I am 47 next month not quite right to be wearing junior sizes or styles.
Need I say more?

**Buckeye5** · 07-19-2007, 09:11 PM

Yes.....Can you hear that one. It is a loud yes. I am a big boobed, nicelarger sized butt( dh thinks so anyway), and bigger thigh kind of girl that is also,5 ft 8 in. tall and I am not average and not a tall Size. I hope that wasn't too much info for all you!! LOL Anyhoo, Anyway, I always say that if I ever became wealthy through lottery ( DH buys a ticket thru work) or something like that, that I would hire a personal seamtress to make my clothes to fit my body, heck with the new car, boat, or house, I just want to look and feel good in a pair of jeans for goodness sakes!!! LOl