I felt like a horrible mother.

[FrugalMomof3]

Ann,

You are NOT a bad mom, believe me I have done that quite a few times with short notices, just because you found out a bit late, you scrambled to make the best of it and I am sure she looked beautiful.

No one understands how hard we try to make things right except the ones who are tring so har, believe me I know. <hugs> to you! Your a wonderful mother

[midwestgal]

You are feeling upset because you ARE a good mom! Every good mom in the world feels like this, and it seems it doesn't go away! Did I read enough stories, did I give enough birthday parties, did I pay enough attention...? My children are all grown, and I still worry about my mothering! But kids don't remember these things at all. And as they get older, they see we were ordinary humans after all, and we did our best. What they remember most is that they were loved unconditionally. Please don't fret!

[Its_Donna]

So many great things have already been said and I agree with them so sending Hugs!

[Daisygirl]

#1) Rachel has been trying to talk me into those sparkly shoes for three years. I bet your daughter was the envy of all the other little girls.

#2) We have all missed the boat on things for our kids before. You actually didn't miss the boat, you just had to row your little dinghy to catchup with it.

#3) I know a lot of moms, true "bad moms" that would have just said, "Well she didn't tell me so it can't be that important" and they would have stayed home. Good for you for pulling it together!

#4) Rachel won't swallow pills so I bury them in a spoon full of strawberry jelly. You might try that. If it is liquid, I use one of those syringes, pin her down and basically shoot it down her throat. I feel like a toad doing thhat, but it has to be done.

Good luck, honey. I know I read your husband is away and it is so hard to do it all alone. For all intents and purposes you are a single mom right now, and that is quite a job, my friend. Do somthing kind for yourself. You deserve it.

Big hugs.

[Nantahala]

{{{{{{}}}}}} You're not a bad mother, I am sorry things are not going so well.

[MarshHen]

I know you guys could turn me around.

And really its kind of laughable because she was dressed nicely, she had on a pink velour top with black velour pants and she picked out her own shoes. Andbody seen the pink sparkley glitter ballet shoes at Target, thats what she had to have. So it wasn't a dress and it wasnt red but atleast it was easy to spot her. And she was very happy.

"OMG, the wrong shoes can totally ruin the outfit, the whole outcome, and your attitude!" I swear, I heard Kimora Simmons say that on her show a few weeks ago. Sounds like you got a little fashion diva on your hands who knows what's going on. Besides, who wants to wear a stiff, ruffled, tired, red and white Christmas dress like everyone else when you can wear black velour pants? Not me, LOL! Trust me, she looked amazing and every little girl on that stage with her was wishing they had cool clothes and a cool mom like your daughter because she didn't have to wear the "Itchy" dress.

Vienna sausage and stick cheese is a special treat for my grandboys. Give them that, or a PB&J and they are happy campers and my 6 yr. old grandson Ethan, refers to it as "The Fancy Dinner," LOL. I bet half of those kids had supper after the event that night, if any if they didn't fall asleep before getting back home.

Trust me, I've been there many times while raising my three kids. In the end what matters most is that you were there. She may not remember what she wore, who was on stage with her or even what she ate for supper that night, but she will remember her momma was there, and that's all that does and will ever matter now and the rest of her life. Trust me, I'm 53 years old, and I remember every school event that my momma attended, and my daddy too. I don't remember the little details, but I remember them being there.

[sixfreds]

Here's the thing you do your best and that makes you a good mother.

My oldest daughter had her 1st communion (years ago now) and my mother said I have your sister's dress she can wear and that day she brought it over I thought it was great until we got to the church and she was the worst dressed everyone else had brand new bright white dress not the old one we hade but what was important was she was there.
We have triplets and I will tell you they look like they all have hand-me-downs because well they do, so what? They are dressed not in new clothes because I can't afford brand new clothes for my kids but they have clothes.

Take a deep breath you are doing fine!
Eileen

[mikandmari]

Anne, when you look back, these will be great memories. I promise! You're dd is a lucky girl, you're a terrific Mom!

[mommy4ever]

Schools need to have their heads examined. We got a note that the kids wear their sunday best. Fine. I made the girls Christmas outfits. 2 days before I get notice that hte one class needed black and white. I was livid.

But I made lemonade and made the rest of the class look bad. I "whipped" up a dress. And made sure she was noticed, and told off the teacher. She knew at the beginning of the month that it would be black and white, it should have been sent.

This year again, sunday bst, then dd10 was told to wear her fancy dress. I will not go and buy, nor did I have time on Monday to change it for Tuesday, nor did i have fabric(I took an oath, no new fabrics until my stash is used up). So I told her, her denim skirt(long tiered) with gogo boots, with a nice top would be fine. And where she was positioned she coulda worn that burlap bag, and no one would have known the difference. I will be addressing the school about that.

Here's the "whipped" up dress, from garage sale finds remade. And the red set was made from garage sale fabrics as well. The gifl black and white had a similar dress made, but never wore it to the concert, she had been made to feel inadequate if she didn't wear black and white.

[cottageliving]

Chin up! I read your post, some responses and your updates. My DD is now 27 and your running around and giving finger foods for dinner along the way brought back memories -- please do not take this wrong, but you allowed me to chuckle at my own "catastrophies". We as mothers have to juggle so much. It sounds like your daughter looked like an angel, she picked out her own sparkly shoes (How great was that!!!), she had fun because all the running around was for HER, and best of all, her mom was in the audience. You are a FANTASTIC mom -- do not ever doubt yourself. The frantic life of a mom is a universal. There is even a commercial for paper towels I see where a little boy tells his mom that he must have 60 cupcakes for his school "tomorrow". Begin crazy baking scene. It's a good commercial. I bring this up so you can see how great you are, and you can see the fun in all of it.

And from your daughter's point of view. Geez ANYONE could have had a red dress -- SHE decided to go with pink velour and sparkles. I love the thought of it.

[Dancing Lotus]

Mommy4 ever- nice dresses you made. Gives me an idea.

I would love to adress each and everyone of you personaly but that would take me all night.. I will just say that I love your stories and thanks for shareing them.

[Michelle68]

Ann---I hereby elect you Best Getting It Together On Short Notice and Pink Sparkly Fashion Diva Mom of the week! You did a great job, both with the last minute Christmas program and your sick DD. Don't feel bad, you're a great mom! Hope your little one is feeling better.


--Michelle

[mommy4ever]

Ann, what's your idea?