I felt like a horrible mother.

**Dancing Lotus** · 12-17-2007, 10:12 PM

Dd had a Christmas show at school tonight. The problem was that I didnt know about it untill one hour before show time. Apparently I didn't get that memo and my dd never said a word. She is only in kindergarten so I had no idea. At five I found a reminder note in her back pack.

She was supose to wear her "holiday dress",she doesn't have one. I was scrambleing to find her something to wear but didn't have any shoes to go with it so I made a decision to go to Target for shoes. With that decision came the fact that we weren't going to have time for dinner. So I gave my kids a cheese stick and some Vienna sausages to hold them over. When I dropped her off in her class room I saw all the other girls had on very fancy dresses and I felt so bad that my dd didn't.

While I sat and waited for the show to starte I was almost in tears. I felt like a terrible mom for not knowing what my kid was doing, for not haveing a nice dress for her and for giveing her that crappy dinner. oh great..... now I am crying! IM sorry my kids don't have fancy clothes but its a waist of my money to buy her something she will only wear once. Im sorry her dress shoes were a two sizes two small becuase she hasn't woren them since last christmas.Nobody ever told me it was gonna be this hard .

**YankeeMom** · 12-17-2007, 10:14 PM

(((hugs)))

**baxjul** · 12-17-2007, 10:20 PM

Oh dear!!! It's okay! You definitely aren't a bad mother!!! I know, I've felt the same way! I'm sure that no one even noticed. Your daughter will love you more for the time that you spend with her and the love that you give to her, rather than what you can buy for her! She loves you and that is all thatmatters!!!!

**Kitten20** · 12-17-2007, 10:22 PM

You're a great mom! These things happen... Your DD got to participate with her classmates and didn't even notice that her dress wasn't as fancy as the other girls', I am sure. You did good for not spending a lot on a dress that she would've only worn once or twice. Please don't beat yourself up over it!

**baxjul** · 12-17-2007, 10:22 PM

Oops, wanted to add that sometimes I have to send dd to school with Spam in her lunch. But, when all the kids say something to her, she tells them that she loves it! A bad mother wouldn't have even fed her children!

**pip** · 12-17-2007, 10:25 PM

Believe me, these things do happen to mothers. It feels bad, but it does happen. Try not to beat yourself up.

toile · 12-17-2007, 10:25 PM

Oh honey!!!
Maybe your school accidentally left others out of the loop too.
More than one reminder always helps.

Your a great mom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This wont matter 20 years from now.
But the fact that you care so much for your daughter will

**Dancing Lotus** · 12-17-2007, 10:27 PM

Sometimes I feel like a fallen star.

When my first dd was little she had the nicest clothes and always look pretty, We were the first too volunteer for things and were always early. But now , well.... I feel like my kids always look like they are wearing hand me downs and I always seam to be running late. Things just aren't they way I imagined.

**yonksgirl** · 12-17-2007, 10:31 PM

You did great! Do not beat yourself up! Your child is healthy, safe, and loved, and that is all that matters! You never know those other little girls in the dresses may be sad little girls. Take it from me, I was the little girl in the fancy dress, my mom gave me everything and more then I ever needed. What I was lacking was a real mother! I never saw her cuz she was always working and up to her ears in debt! I had to deal with her being canky because she was so stresses over money! You are doing the right thing!

**baxjul** · 12-17-2007, 10:32 PM

Awww, try not to be so hard on yourself! I'm sure that your dd looked wonderful! Every mother goes through a bad time at one point or another. Things will get better! If you ever need to talk, just pm me!

**northernmom2boys** · 12-17-2007, 10:34 PM

Your little girl is going to remember you being there,thats all that really matters

**Dancing Lotus** · 12-17-2007, 10:43 PM

Thanks everyone, I think I just need a hot bath and to go to bed. Its just been one of those days. I hope I will see things differently tomarrow.

**baxjul** · 12-17-2007, 10:53 PM

(((Big hugs))) Get a good nights sleep, and things should look better in the morning!

**kittykatstrong** · 12-17-2007, 11:09 PM

A hot

always does the trick for me. She will not remember the dress but the fact that you were there that night.

**sdrjeolsen** · 12-17-2007, 11:20 PM

I agree witht he others, the thing that makes her the happiest is that you came to see her.

Kids don't notice things like clothes that much till they are older. You are a wonderful mom, you made the evening work, even on short notice.....If it makes you feel any better, I don't often find the note till after the fact. Its just a part of being a mom, you don't have to be "on the ball" at all times. You were there, she was fed, I'm sure she loved having you be there for her special production.