Men are amusing creatures

**KJayEsq** · 02-18-2008, 12:53 PM

OK ladies. Here's what I don't get. Guys can get all angry and throw a tantrum and not speak to you and pout and do whatever other childish things they do when they're mad.

Then the next day, when you are expecting a big conversation or confrontation or something - they are good as gold and act as if nothing was ever wrong.

I don't get it. My BF was all mad on Saturday night. He didn't like my political views and he didn't like me mouthing off to somebody who deserved to be mouthed off to, etc. etc. It turned into a huge deal and really it was him overreacting. So on Sunday I wake up expecting the cold shoulder at the least and he was perfectly fine and affectionate and didn't even bring it up. Whatever. I'm still a bit cranky over it.

I know this is a rhetorical question but - any similar experiences out there??

**Darlene** · 02-18-2008, 01:05 PM

Yep, and as a young girl I remember saying boys are stupid, lol. I mean why get all bent out of shape and pitch a fit if you are just going to act as though it was no big deal the next day? Now that I know he's this way I let him do his thing , roll my eyes and know that tomorrow he won't say boo about it.

Men are wacky, I think they just like hearing themselves roar sometimes.
They are selective listeners & rememberers.

**perSue** · 02-18-2008, 01:13 PM

what i think it is, is we all know men are emotionally immature at times, so when they get bent outta shape over something, maybe it's their "pms" or they realized later on they were wrong & dont wanna admit it and pretend nothing happened - and wish you would too!

they dont take everything as personally as we do, especially if it's an indirect happening. usually a good night's sleep will make everything ok again.

it is a lot like being a kid again. what made us angry yesterday is, well, yesterday's business. and since yesterday is over, today is new... so let's start anew.

and in some cases that's a good thing. i've actually learned to do this again. if it's small bones, then dont carry the anger over into the next day. why ruin a perfectly good new day? lol

however if it's an important thing.. discuss it.
be honest & say "my feelings were hurt because of such&such" and try to be friendly, non confrontational & maybe even joke about it. just so he doesnt go all quiet & not talk the rest of the day again.

otherwise, i use the "pick your battles" motto for most of this stuff. if it's something i know i took too personally, i'll just be in my own bad mood and try not to let it spread, but will talk myself through it til i understand "I" was the only one upset.

hope my experience hellps.

**annymoll** · 02-18-2008, 01:16 PM

Sounds like he woke up on Sunday morning wanting hanky panky. So he had to be sweet as sugar.If you had been experiencing cranky hanky, he might have given you the cold shoulder.

**shoiji** · 02-18-2008, 01:40 PM

I have worked with mostly men and mostly women. I prefer working with men because they do just that, blow off steam and back to business. Women seem to hold on to things more often. Atleast that is what I have experienced.

**TheRootedNomad** · 02-18-2008, 02:06 PM

Been there.....This is what happens if he gets mad first.

If I get mad first he has to get madder and stay madder longer. This is his escape from dealing with the fact that I'm mad. I know the pattern and the reasoning but can't seem to find a way to make it change....when I'm not mad it's amuseing ...when I am it feeds the flames.

**Daisygirl** · 02-18-2008, 02:30 PM

I have this great t-shirt that says 'BOYS ARE STUPID, THROW ROCKS AT THEM'

This is just his way of controlling the situation. Guys like to be in control of the mood. IE he is mad, so you are mad. Then he figures if he is over it and happy, you should be over it and happy. Men think very simplistically.

Here's the kicker - if you act like you are still ticked off at him he will be baffled and have absolutely no idea what is wrong with you, which, in turn will enflame you even more (if you are anything like me.)

Can't live with 'em.... well you know.

**Squirt** · 02-18-2008, 04:14 PM

My dbf doesn't fly off the handle- he pouts. Most times, I have no idea why he's pouting. So I don't ask. It's stupid. If I'm upset about something I get it off of my chest immediately so it can be dealt with, and I do not hold a grudge. I would give a bazillion dollars to find a man who is the same way.

**IntlMom** · 02-18-2008, 04:18 PM

I could write a book on this subject with my personal experience.....but we'll just leave it at this:
You are SO right!!!
I feel your pain, and I deal with my own!!!

**KJayEsq** · 02-18-2008, 06:27 PM

LMAO! Thanks for the stories - I feel much better and I KNEW I would find support here (as always).

**emily_hope** · 02-18-2008, 08:16 PM

Been there done that. I stew for awhile and he is over it so fast it makes your head spin. LOL

**AmyBoz** · 02-18-2008, 08:31 PM

You have no idea.

**Edna_E** · 02-18-2008, 08:44 PM

Yep. I used to think it was 'cuz their mama's didn't raise them right - but MY ds does that too! I've tried for years to make him aware of the idiocy of getting so hot about something that he'll forget about within 24 hours, but I've had precious little success. At least he's USUALLY even tempered, but he still does what you described. Maybe it's in their hormones!