Car Shopaholics....

[dianne9106]

Ugh! Okay if this is in the wrong place, please let me know.
First, we are debt free except the mortgage. This alone should make us soooo happy!! We have a nice home, great kids (working on more), my husband as a great career that has no where to go but up, I am SAHM and life is good. But why do we keep wanting to get better, nicer, cooler cars??? I have a 2005 Toyota Sienna and my husband has a 2005 Nissan Frontier. So what's the problem?? I want an Odyssey and he wants a 4x4 Frontier!! I am mean we go through this round and round every few weeks. We talk ourselves down from it and stay away from the dealerships. Since moving back to the US from Europe in July 2007, we have bought and traded 4 cars!! Hello!! Our neighbors either think we are the Gates or are running a stolen car ring! It is so bad that I am thinking of selling my engagement ring to use towards buying an Odyssey with my trade! I even called my banking guy and he thinks we are nuts! At this rate we won't have a retirement or a nest egg much less an emergency fund! Does anyone else go through this? Does one miss working towards the goal of paying something off or is it the shopping experience and newness?

[changed4life]

I can only assume why you might be this way but that wouldn't be fair since I don't know you at all.

I would say to really look within (both of you) to find out why material things are so important to you. Sometimes it's due to an issue with self-esteem, competing with others or with it giving you a sense of success. Success, financial and otherwise, is defined many different ways by many different people. Coming up with a healthy definition of success and happiness may put your yearnings to rest, however, it might take professional help.

Perhaps your focus needs to change to your current blessings and keep looking at them. Replace the thoughts of wanting more with truly being happy with what you already have.

It sounds like you might be defining who you are by what you drive. We are so much more than our belongings.

When I realized I was trying to fill a hole with materialism, a perfect looking home and a perfect persona, it stopped me in my tracks. When I finally filled it with what my heart really wanted, I found total peace. Now a new car, etc. really doesn't mean didly squat to me.

My hope is that if you really want to change this way of thinking, you will find the way to peace.

From the number of your posts, it looks like you are rather new. Check around the site and look into getting tips on starting an emergency fund and retirement fund. There are also many other helpful tips in every area of our financial lives found right here.

Best of luck!

[dianne9106]

You know, we have actually had that conversation and that's what keeps us from buying another car. The whole Dave Ramsey mantra "Buying stuff you don't need, with money you don't have, to impress people you don't like!"
Fortunately we have an emergency fund, retirement for both of us and working on two college funds. We truly don't want to be back in debt, but it is so difficult not to want some things. Thank you for your input.

[Michelle68]

Hmmm...this is a tough one for me because I'm a home health nurse and to me a car is pretty much just a tool for my work. As long as it gets me from X to Y reliably, I'm satisfied. I think y'all have done a good job this time of not giving into "temptation" as you had in the past. Some people just love automobiles (look at all the collectors out there) and you and your DH might be two people who enjoy nice vehicles, the new car smell, the newest gadgets, etc. Unfortunately, this can definitely derail your financial security. Maybe you can make a plan to keep each of your cars for a certain amount of time and save enough to pay for a couple of new-to-you vehicles with cash when you buy new ones. (Dave Ramsey plan) It'll definitely take a lot of sacrifice on both of your parts, but just think of how much good it'll do your finances and how good it'll feel to not have ruined your financial goals.


--Michelle

[ladykemma2]

can you pay CASH for the new cars?

[dianne9106]

I am feeling better about buying a different car today. It's like it hits me that I would like a newer van (doesn't have to be brand new) and then my husband rediscovers his desire to get a newer truck. Sometimes it's vice versa.
Do we have cash to pay for them - yes if I take it out of something else - but not because I have $xxx sitting around my house (I wish). So without hurting out nest egg, we do not have the cash to put towards a newer vehicle on trade or whatever the case may be.
What is completely awful is that I had even contemplated going back into debt for a newer auto HELLO!!!! This is a pattern with us and I am so glad that I have FV as the voice of reason - thank you all for just listening or reading!
Dianne

[dianne9106]

DH sold his truck so he could get an AWD Subaru. We were lucky that we was able to find a pre-owned 2007 still under warranty! It turned out that we got it for $3K under retail and had a little extra cash to put with it. His truck was 4WD and he has to travel the country from TN to GA to AZ to OK to AZ to TN for the next year going to various Army schools. I feel good that he has a dependable car that is under warranty and is AWD for any weather that he may run into next fall/winter.
I feel good about my van and maybe one day I will get something different. It suits all of our needs really well with no complaints (except my car addiction) just fine.
Thank you again for the input - hopefully we can break this painful cycle!
Dianne

[JanieD]

Dianne9106, you might find this funny. I have the opposite problem. I can't let go of my old car! I'm having the engine overhauled next week & that’s only the first step. It needs so much work! Sure I could go in debt & get a great car, but honestly I wouldn’t be any happier. Anyway, I thought you would enjoy the other side of it!

[leezza]

Diane,

How about taking the car you have to a place for a professional detail job, (you know they do the whole bit including shampooing the carpets, steam cleaning the seat, waxing the outside).......this would cost about $200 here in our area. That way your existing car would feel and look great! maybe that would help a bit : )

JMHO,
leezza

[loveless82]

Hiya,


LOL... We are like this too... I'm 25 yrs old, since I was 16yrs old My hubby and I have own get ready....63 vehicles.. But most of them we bought cash out right, and it only been the last 3 or 4 vehicles that we have to make payment with the dealer(kind like a buy here pay here deal). With that said none of the vehicles were brand new, cuz no bank will loans us cuz we don't have a home phone... Some of the vehicle were bought ran great and we sold them to make more money when were in need, then other ones were just cheap and need work that we didn't fix right away, so they died....lol...
As of now my hubby is driving a 95 jeep wrangler which he loves and hates, he had 3 other so with this one being his 4th he trying to work out that issues. As for me I'm driving 97 Chrysler sebring convertible, which I not to happy with but it get great gas mileage so it growing on me..