Do you ever feel as if you are just standing still in the path of life?

[lwlynch]

I know this may be a weird question. Maybe I am just getting older and I see through alot of people. Maybe it is being the stay at home mom, but yet when I worked outside of the home I still felt out of the loop.
I have lately had my friends call and it just seems as if their lives are just running 90 miles an hour. Many things to do, place to go, people to see. It seems that they have no money yet, they have so many things. I just am amazed when they even complain. By the end of the conversations, I am exhausted from talking with them.
Today for example, the friend talked about how she could hook me up with people and do this and that, since all I do is stay home. Yet she forgets I have children, and I was content and don't need to be fixed. I told her that I was perfectly happy and that I felt that at this moment in time, that I was doing exactly what I was suppossed to be in my life. Gosh, sometimes I think they think I am dying, of boredom, or something. I don't know how they could get that idea, they talk more about themselves, before they even ask about me.
Then when I hang up, sometimes I feel as if I am missing something (it is just a brief moment) I am always, thinking about goals and what happens next when the kids get to where they can be alone. But I am sure that I will not leave my post at home for awhile. I am content being as we call it the "homebase" I can network a whole family at a drop of a hat. I dabble in my writing, and I work on my art. I don't know maybe people are uncomfortable with people who are content, no drama..(well a bit sometimes)
I don't know why I wrote this, but sometimes, people disappoint me. I was just curious if any one else felt as crazy as I do...
Maybe I am just having one of those doubting days....ahahahahah

[changed4life]

Ms. Louise...we're about the same age and I can assure you that you are not alone. I relate when you say everyone's life seems to be going 100 miles per hour except for mine. I'm content and my life is basically quiet and serene. I guess because I've been fortunate enough to make it that way. Drama I do not do.

I sometimes get the feeling others think I live a boring life, but life is what you make it. Personally, I wouldn't want to be running on empty. That's no life at all for me. I make my family the most important to me, focus on them, spend time with a few quality friends and live my days in a way that enhances my spirit and emotional well being.

Rushing from here to there, finding ways to get rich or be in a race to meet up with the Jones is not my idea of living anyway.

Just let your days unfold and don't let the views of others (or their comments) make you question your life and the place you are right now. I've learned to be content with the moment. If I live always looking to 6 months down the road, I find I miss what's vitally important and relevant right in front of me.

And, I relate. People often disappoint me too. I'm learning just to worry about myself and if they disappoint me, I always have God in my corner.

[forHISglory]

Ms. Louise, I was the one in the fast lane for years. I was motivated, determined to do it all and do it the best. Then I retired last year and suddenly I realized all that I had missed. For example, today, I did a lot of little jobs: sweep and dust, picked up sticks, made a meal for a family with a medical crisis, planted flowers, took pictures of new tulips and of the flowering trees in the forest. I moved at a slower pace, sat down once in a while and scratched the dog's head, checked email, took time out for tea, made time for my Bible study...... I am finding it so good to be at home and doing these things that I really want to do.

Thanks for your post. It is worthy.

[Palooka]

I get this from people all the time. Just tonight someone said I should get out more and 'get a life' so to say! I happen to like having no drama either. Few of my daughter's friends parents are on the go 24/7 and always so busy. See, that would stress me out. I like my life to be simple. And I hate when I get called a homebody for it.

[Starlight9803]

I stay at home with my kiddos and feel much the same as you do. Seems everyone I know is "go, go, go" and "do this, do that" all the time, and they don't understand that I'm perfectly content to just stay at home, school the kids, tend my garden, and mind my own business (hence less drama LOL). I've gotten called stuck up, crazy, boring, stick in the mud, anti-social, and much more, but I just let it roll right off me. It used to hurt, but now I know that I am happy where I'm at, and if they have an issue with that, well, that's their problem, right?

[JerryG]

but what you say is true. I'm "been there, done that". It's a huge case of heartburn and insomnia. I understand where other people are at however, a day watching the flowers grow and not worry about the mortgage / impressions is a good, good day.

Thanks for starting the thread!!

[latierra84]

i wish i could drop 75% of the things that i currently "do" when im not working. ive started gardening and i cant tell you how wonderful its been for me. just... me time. no one is needing me to pick them up or cell phone ringing or can you help him with his homework.. its just.. me time. i love it.

[zakity]

We did the hectic life thing. It sucked. We hated it.

Our quality of life is much better now.

[happimommi]

I can totally relate. I love being a SAHM and I love it more now that I actually have a quiet house for part of the day. I am a quiet person and I don't enjoy being around lots of people and drama all the time. I am happy with my life and if people think I do nothing all day....well...to bad!

[FrugalWitch]

I used to miss the ultra-busy life, but I'm comfortable now with being a SAHW. LOL about busy-busy friends being exhausting to listen to, I know exactly what you mean.

[HandyMom]

I am glad for you that you are content with where you are and what you are doing being at home and not out in the workforce. I used to wish I could do the same but now that I am at home full-time I've found it's not all what I thought it would be like and to be honest, I very much miss being out of the house on a daily basis and earning a good living and being with other adults. My life was so much more organized then, too. The only friends I had then were at work and once I quit working I lost my friends and I quit socializing with anyone other than family. I have an endless list of chores and no one to help me with them. I no longer have time or I am just too worn out for any hobbies I once loved.

The big highlight of my days now is finally sitting down at the computer to read or laying down to watch some tv before I go to sleep.

Some people have told me they used to envy me because I was not at work anymore and stayed home but what they found out is that it is a lot more work to stay at home taking care of a household and kids, especially when you are doing it alone. That's basically what the life of a stay-at-home Mom is all about.

[TheRootedNomad]

I'm on the go alot more than I would like to be ... but not as much as I use to be. I would love to slow it down even more. I do avoid the drama and am continuously looking at the "have tos" and realizing "nope it's not a have to".

[PrairieRose]

I've been married for 31 3/4's yrs. now and for all but 7 of it I've stayed at home. The 7 I worked (owned 2 small video stores) were the most hectic, drama filled, unorganized, pressurized years of my life. My family was all much happier when I was at home and I was too. I thought for a few years that I'd like to have a business or a job, for the interaction with others but boy howdy did I learn in a hurry that it sure ain't all it's cracked up to be! I *love* being at home with my poodle and seeing my husband for lunch and doing my 'thing' here. Our lives are much more serene b/c I'm at home. I don't feel like I'm standing still b/c I truly feel that I'm on a quest (more like a spiritual one) daily. I love the little surprises that await me every single day. Life truly is what you make of it.

[cab54]

I've also one the hectic rat race and hated it. A lot of it was wrapped up in the kids' activities, but we let some people create it in our own lives. The kids are grown and it's quieter now, calmer........ DH and I are both homebodies. We like peace and serenity.

Still I am like you, I often find myself second-guessing and wondering if I'm some kind of slug or something? Like you, Ms Louise, I have my arts and my passtimes here at home.

Personally I think these folks are just 'built' for hectic. But I wonder---how do they slow down at night and relax to get to sleep? How do they keep from from having anxiety issues and have time to take care of their mental health? And they DO suck all of the energy out of you, don't they? Makes you want to avoid them.

Not me, I don't want to be laying on my deathbed and looking back on a frenzied BLUR of a life. I want to remember rocking my children, flowers dancing in the wind, toast and coffee in the AM , and hugging my sons when they come back home now, their smell, their laugh.

Don't let 'em get ya down, Ms Louise!

[lovestolaugh]

My husband was transfered to another state 2 years ago. At the time I was deeply upset about the move. I had lived in the same small town for my entire 34 years of life. I was scared to death of starting over somewhere I had never even visited before. Now looking back, I can honestly say that it was the best thing that has ever happened to me. I started over from scratch. I grew up soooo much and I can say that I really like the person I am now. I was always running at full speed back home. Since being here I have slowed down and I can truly say I am content. I have a part time job that I love. It's in the school district so I have summers, weekends, holidays and snow days off! I put the kids on the bus in the morning and am home before they get back. I make some money for special things and the best thing of all is I can lay my head down on my pillow at night and sleep well. My kids are thriving and my marriage is great. I find pleasure in the simplest things now and don't have any desire or need to do more than I am doing. I used to have friends that tired me out too. I have slowly separated myself from them and have a few very close friends that I know would go to the wall for me. I am content with my own company and don't feel left out of any "group" or "click". My Aunt always said that she would rather be lonely than bored and I have to agree that she was right! So give yourself a hug and know that you are doing great. If you are happy with yourself, then no one else's opinion should matter!!!! Have a great day!