DH may finally be on board

**ansley** · 07-24-2009, 04:27 PM

We sat down and made a budget for Aug. using a spreadsheet from www.climbingout.net. I think it is mid-way down the right of the page. The spreadsheet overwhelmed DH at first. I am the nerd and had to read the How to Use page more than once. DH really liked the Cash Flow Planning page. It has the income split by pay period at the top (we did weekly because I am paid weekly) then the budgeted items below. When you put in that you paid an item in that pay period it would automatically update to show how much you had left. He said it would help him pay bills. He was almost excited about it. I think it is more an "I have this much money to spend" instead of "I can only spend this much on ________". It is the same thing but he feels more limited on the budget. We will make the budget together but I will fill in the spent on the budget sheet and he will fill out the Cash Flow Planning sheet. Please pray that this works out and he will keep at it. If we can get this snowball rolling I may get a membership to TMMO just to let Dustin (he made the spreadsheet) know how it most likely saved my marriage.

**Ceashels** · 07-24-2009, 06:06 PM

YAY! each little goal met is still a goal met!

**frugalfranny** · 07-24-2009, 06:08 PM

Progress is progress......way to go.

**the Dad** · 07-24-2009, 06:09 PM

Originally Posted by ansley

We sat down and made a budget for Aug. using a spreadsheet from. I think it is mid-way down the right of the page. The spreadsheet overwhelmed DH at first. I am the nerd and had to read the How to Use page more than once. DH really liked the Cash Flow Planning page. It has the income split by pay period at the top (we did weekly because I am paid weekly) then the budgeted items below. When you put in that you paid an item in that pay period it would automatically update to show how much you had left. He said it would help him pay bills. He was almost excited about it. I think it is more an "I have this much money to spend" instead of "I can only spend this much on ________". It is the same thing but he feels more limited on the budget. We will make the budget together but I will fill in the spent on the budget sheet and he will fill out the Cash Flow Planning sheet. Please pray that this works out and he will keep at it. If we can get this snowball rolling I may get a membership to TMMO just to let Dustin (he made the spreadsheet) know how it most likely saved my marriage.

You won't have to get a membership to TMMO just to let Dustin know, Ansley. I'll tell him right now.

Good luck, darlin'!

the Dad
Climbing Out

**Greebo** · 07-24-2009, 06:17 PM

If you're the nerd, feel free to do the nerdy stuff, and then review it WITH him, making sure he gets a vote. Then you adjust it and take it back to him.

That can help him keep from being overwhelmed while still making him an equal part of the process. He gets to make you lighten up, and you get to make him tighten up. Partners!

**Luckybustert** · 07-24-2009, 09:58 PM

Congratulations, ansley! Glad to hear you and your DH are making progress.

**ansley** · 07-25-2009, 07:51 PM

Originally Posted by the Dad

You won't have to get a membership to TMMO just to let Dustin know, Ansley. I'll tell him right now.

Good luck, darlin'!

the Dad
Climbing Out

Thank you as well. I didn't just want to say thanks to the Dad because I'm sure there are a lot of dads on here.

Greebo, the plan is to do the budget together but I will enter it on the spreadsheet. He doesn't want me to do the bills and he likes that 1 page. So when he does the bills he will fill out that part. He has always had a vote and as head of our household the right to over rule me (if he had a good reason). He said it was like someone was telling him how to spend his money. This page tells him how much he has to spend and he can spend as he likes. Then I can come in and see how we did on the budget.

**Debbie-cat** · 07-25-2009, 08:22 PM

Originally Posted by Greebo

If you're the nerd, feel free to do the nerdy stuff, and then review it WITH him, making sure he gets a vote. Then you adjust it and take it back to him.

That can help him keep from being overwhelmed while still making him an equal part of the process. He gets to make you lighten up, and you get to make him tighten up. Partners!

**mateosbaby** · 07-25-2009, 11:36 PM

Originally Posted by ansley

He said it was like someone was telling him how to spend his money. This page tells him how much he has to spend and he can spend as he likes. Then I can come in and see how we did on the budget.

Hey, my husband said the exact same thing! I'm a SAHM, so it really WAS me telling him how to spend his own money. I've stepped back and given him a much bigger say in the budget, and now we're all good. Not as gazelle-intense as I am myself, but at least we're getting somewhere now, rather than butting heads all the time.

That's almost more stressful than being too far in debt!

**ansley** · 07-30-2009, 02:54 PM

First (DH on board) budget starts Friday. I just found out that I will be off Monday without pay. That ck should land on the 27th. This will muck up the budget a little. We did set the budget up with DH’s average income from the 1st 6mos of this yr. Maybe he will bring in enough to cover it. Oh well, if DH can see the budget work out (with minimal pain) he might stick to it. We are still blessed.

If you are a praying person, please say a prayer for me. No blow money for yrs is starting to wear on me. I am at the edge of what I have been working so hard for and if I don't keep it together I'll lose it. TIA