When you’re going through the process of losing weight and getting fitter and healthier, there may be many times when you will eat food which perhaps isn’t healthy for you. Or perhaps you overeat or don’t exercise. This is quite normal and most people find that they do this. The difference between losing weight and not losing weight is how you handle this. Do you give yourself a hard time mentally and really beat yourself up for doing it, perhaps saying "It was stupid to eat all those chocolates", "What’s wrong with me – can’t I even resist some cake?", "Why can’t I motivate myself to exercise this week, when everyone else can?" or even "I’m useless at losing weight." Hey - just look at all the abuse you’re heaping on yourself.Would you speak to a friend in the same way? I doubt it. Yet in some ways it seems okay to abuse ourselves.

I’ve heard many people label themselves in a negative way, particularly with regard to losing weight. Labels such as ‘bad’, ‘useless’, or ‘no willpower’. A common phrase is whether you’ve been ‘good’ or ‘bad’ this week with your eating habits. "I’ve been ‘bad’ this week because I ate a Chinese takeaway." I really encourage you to steer clear of using the expression ‘bad’. There may have been many instances during the week when you ate healthily. Yet any diversion from this and you immediately label yourself as ‘bad’. The problem is when you label yourself this way, you tend to get stuck into giving yourself a hard time, rather than finding a way to accept what you’ve done and then move on. When you give yourself a hard time, you’re more likely to overeat as a means of dealing with how you feel about yourself. What is this costing you personally? What do you achieve by being hard on yourself? When you understand what you achieve from this, you’ll find it easier to find a solution and move on.

Beating yourself up keeps you trapped and the way to permanent weight loss is to keep moving forward. Let’s say you’ve eaten some extra food and you find yourself caught into giving yourself a hard time. What’s the way forward? I suggest you create a sign for yourself that says "Stop giving yourself a hard time." This can be a real sign, such as a sticker on your computer screen, in your handbag, or on your kitchen cupboard. Or it can be an imaginary sign in your mind which you create. You can add colour to it, a smiley face, anything which lightens it up. This isn’t meant to be another way to beat yourself up. This sign is supposed to be fairly light-hearted with the intention of moving you on from this impasse of giving yourself a hard time. At those times when either you’ve eaten extra food , or eaten unhealthily or not exercised and you begin to mentally abuse yourself, call on this sign, either by reading it or visualising it. By referring to this sign during the day, you’re likely to be gentler with yourself. It’s a way of catching yourself, forgiving yourself and then moving on. When you can forgive yourself for what you’ve done, you’ll find you’ll get back to being healthy more quickly.

What will it take before you stop giving yourself a hard time?


Wendy Hearn
Weight Loss Success Coach

Author of "The Top 10 Things That Stop YOU From Losing Weight" http://www.PositiveWeightLoss.com

I work with people who want to lose weight and have a great life. I offer individual and group coaching, via the telephone or email. http://www.WeightLossCoaching.com

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