Worried about DH...
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  1. #1
    Registered User AnW819's Avatar
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    Default Worried about DH...

    So DH started working 3rd shift about two weeks ago. He has been fine, or so I thought.

    He leaves for work around 9:20pm and gets home @ 7am. Yesterday I get a phone call from him around 10pm (he is suppose to be @ work by 10) and he sounds scared; and in a panic. He says:

    Babe---I don't know what just happened. I think I blacked out or something but I hit the back of some guys car. I am okay, and so is he, and the cars are okay, but I am scared because I do not know what happened.

    I know what happened. He started to fall asleep. He had told me before leaving for work he is really tired but he will be fine.

    He got home the day b4 @ 7am, went to be til 10:30am when he had to take me to work. Then he got home and could not fall back asleep til 6pm, and got up at 8pm...

    So he is not getting much sleep at all.

    I am just worried that is he not getting enough sleep. This could have been REALLY bad. Thank god he is okay though.

  2. #2
    Registered User nodmicks's Avatar
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    I'm glad to hear he wasn't hurt!!!!!!!

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    Registered User fixer's Avatar
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    He must get more sleep. I worked nights and it was the hardest thing I ever did. I was constantly sleep-deprived. Others I worked with used medication in order to sleep. I would not. In hindsight, I probably should have. Sleeping during the day is very hard. Keep watch on him. You will take much better care of him than he will himself.

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    My ds has been working nights and has finally started taking medication because he just can't sleep. Since the economy has gotten bad now my dh has taken a job the same shift. He is also having a hard time getting a proper amount of sleep. I read something or saw something on tv that our bodies are just not meant to sleep during the day and awake all night; so it is hard. I thought about buying one of those nature sounding alarm clocks to see if that would help. I'm not sure what the answer is. My ds sleeps when he gets home; my dh sleeps b4 he goes to work. Maybe your dh could try the opposite of what he is doing to see if that helps. My dh seems to sleep better than ds.

    Soooo glad yr dh is ok!!!!

  5. #5
    Registered User Contrary Housewife's Avatar
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    3rd shift sucks. Your body wants to sleep, he's fighting his natural rhythm. He can't sleep during the day because his brain is getting signals from the sun to be awake.

    You need to black-out the bedroom, tape the windows up if you have to and make it absolutely black. Remove the phone and any other distractions. He cannot get up at 10 and take you to work, it will really mess him up. You have to figure out some way of getting to work.

    You can get melatonin tablets at a health or nutrition store like GNC. They will trigger the natural sleep cycle in his brain. They are not like sleeping pills that will leave him drugged and groggy. This will help him adjust to the new schedule, but he must sleep all day without interruption.
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    Registered User AnW819's Avatar
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    Our bedroom is really dark bc of the curtains and I keep the house quiet...its just he feels like he has no time to do anything so its almost like he does not want to sleep, but now because of that he missed a day of work already...so he has to figure something out.

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    Registered User TeganZ's Avatar
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    The best thing you can do is be there for him !

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    I work 10:30 PM to 8:30 AM and it's horrible, but I have been doing it for 5 yrs or so. Go figure!

    It is VERY hard to sleep during the day. Like others said, our bodies are programmed to be awake during the day. I feel like I am constantly tired, even when I do get sleep.

    I keep a black sheet over my bedroom window to block out all sun. I do take medication (Tylenol PM) occasionally, but I do not rely on it. It sure as heck does feel like there is no time in the day to do anything else, between work and sleep. It takes adjustment.

    You mentioned that your DH has to take you to work at 10 AM. Does he have to pick you up, also? Is there any way that he could stay up until he takes you (safely, of course) and then just sleep until 6 or 7? That may work better than taking a little "cat nap" before 10 AM. I know when I take short naps, my body often feels like it's gotten it's second wind and then I can't sleep again.

    I am glad your DH and the other driver are both okay! How scary.

  9. #9
    Registered User MaryCarney's Avatar
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    OK - here's some life saving advice from someone who has worked nights for 30+ years. When you are driving fatigued, it is as though you are DWI!!! You reactions are slowed and judgement not the best. The BEST thing you can do is pull over, recline the seat and sleep for 30 minutes or so. The NEXT BEST thing you can do is turn the radio on to a station where there is only TALK (no music) You then say every word the radio people arre saying - I don't know why this works, but it does. You have to keep talking along with the radio people for it to keep working.

    Secondly, is there a valid reason for him to drive you to work??? If not, uninterrupted sleep is better than broken. Here's what I do to sleep during the day.
    1) Dark room - cool but not cold (if you have an automatic thermostat, it may be too warm in the bedroom during daytime hours)
    2) White noise - I turn a fan on low (facing the wall so it's not blowing on me)
    3) OTC sleep aid - diphenhydramine (benadryl) works but leaves you mouth like cotton) I take doxylamine (Walgreens and WalMart have it - read the label, it's generic Sominex I think) Works great, no hangover, no dry mouth.
    4) Prescription 'stay awake' med - Provigil -cheaper than a funeral! Must take it as prescribed
    5) Sleep deprivation shortens your life- there is no harm in getting enough sleep. I know, you fell like you're wasting your day off - get over it and just sleep.
    I actually like doing my shopping and such at off hours, no crowds in the 24 hour stores. Hope this helps!!!

  10. #10
    Registered User AnW819's Avatar
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    Thanks. DH has to drive me to work because I do not drive. As for the cool room, dark, etc. we do all that

  11. #11
    Moderator monkeywrangler71's Avatar
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    If he was working 9am-7pm he wouldn't come home and sleep until 10, then get up for a while, then expect to be able to sleep well afterwards. He needs to be doing all his sleeping without interruption. Think about what hours he would be sleeping on the day shift, then just reverse AM & PM. Get up at 8, get dressed and go to work, come home at 7, putter around until 11 then go to bed. A regular schedule, just AMs where most people have PMs. There is too much tendency for people to think they have a day off when they are on nightshift.

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    Registered User SewCrafty's Avatar
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    I like Mary worked the night shift for over 20+ years, everything she said is on point.

    I would also add, turn off the phone ringer while he is sleeping.

    Once he gets into an established routine, it will be much easier.

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    Registered User Debbie-cat's Avatar
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    I am glad he is okay. He does need more sleep and I understand how difficult it is to sleep during the day. Hopefully he can figure something out to get more rest.
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    Registered User MaryCarney's Avatar
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    Could you get a ride at least one of the trips to/from work?? What if you bought gas for someone?

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    Moderator baxjul's Avatar
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    I used to work 3rd shift for about 5 years. It can be really rough in the beginning, and some people never get used to it. I used to stay up when I got home in the morning, until around 10 or 11, because really, when you work first shift, you don't go to bed as soon as you get home. Then I would get up around 6 pm, and be up for the night. That is the schedule that worked the best for me.


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