2 boys~2 issues

[IntlMom]

Ok, so let me start by saying that I understand that this is not the place for a diagnosis, I know that. Having said that, here's what happening in our home right now:

ds9-this is my older (by a month) son. He has ADHD, which I realize comes with it's own debateable issues. He was adopted at 10 months from a Russian orphanage. So is it ADHD? Don;t know, but that's what we've called it for nearly 6 years. He has been on meds since he was 5. Adderall, Metadate, Straterra, you name it. The "bummer" of it is that they work! (I wish they didn't, but hey do!) Anyway, we took him off of them last Oct, we just have issues with the whole ADHD med thing. He is a brilliant kid, and as long as he is engaged in something challenging, he's fine....but leave him to his own devices, and he drives ppl away with his aggressiveness and over-hyperactivity. He has had kids tell him they will only be his friend if he isn;t wild. That;s just not fair for him. ANYWAY, today we started him up again on the meds. We waited for the weekend so we could see it firsthand. It's a new med called Vyvanse, so I will be waiting to see how he will do with it.......that's all, thanks for listening!

ds9-this is my younger son. He has FAS (fetal alchohol syndrome). Anyway, everything has been going along as normal as life is with him. (He's actually a joy, and MUCH easier to deal with than my ADHD boy). Anyway, a few weeks ago, I noticed he had begun to have a few accidents in his pants, he's been potty trained with no probs since he was 5. Yesterday he wet himself while sitting on the couch and I learned that he had wet himself at school too. I tried to talk with him about any probs at school or fears that he might have. He's never been good at expressing feelings (due to his FAS). I just get alot of "Ummmmmm" from him. I plan on taking him to the DR soon, but let me ask, can this happen as puberty begins to set him? Anyone have any experience with this?

Ok, thanks for making it thru this post.
I LOVE THE VILLAGE!

[Jskell911]

I am pretty unfamiliar with the wetting issues, but everything I have read regarding this at an older age states a visit to the doc is not a bad idea. It also states that this should dissappear during puberty. Good luck and I hope the doc has some positive words for you.

On the other issue of ADHD meds: If they truely work then perhaps they are truely needed. I understand your attitude regarding not wanting to medicate your child (been there!), but I always tried to think of it this way

These disorders are generally a result of an inability of the brain to produce something that is necessary, not unlike diabetes is the body's inability to produce insulin. If your child needed insulin, you would provide that. Same story with the brain.


Good luck!

[zakity]

We tried a special diet for our ADHD child. It works for him.

If the meds works for him, then have him take them.

Q, my child who is ADHD, is also homeschooled and doesn't have to sit in a classroom with 25 other kids making distracting noises and movements. I am ADHD also. I hated school because it was so hard to concentrate with all the other kids wiggling and talking and breathing. It was very distracting.

[dolphin]

Well, since you asked, I'll give you my 'experienced' opinion. I won't go into detail as it would take hours...

He has had kids tell him they will only be his friend if he isn;t wild.

My son went through the same and almost the exact words were said to him.

ADHD, you have 2 choices...Keep the child on meds till he refuses to take them.

The "bummer" of it is that they work!

Do not give him 'med vacations'. Make sure that you have him on a medication and dosage that does not make him a zombie.

Or, you can try completely changing his diet. Dr. Feingold has an excellent cookbook for ADHD and there are others. But, you have to be hypervigillent about this diet and you also need to have allergy testing done for it to work well. You would even need to supply all snacks and school lunches. Everything must be made from scratch with no addditives unless you test the child with each new additive to see if it makes a change first. This includes things such as mashed potatoes! You can't go out to eat because even a minor change in their diet could turn them around for a week or 2.

I have a child with adhd who is now 22. He refused meds after age 13 and nope, didn't finish school. He also snuck behind my back to eat 'non approved' snacks so the diet didn't have a chance to work. Looking back now I wish that I had never given him 'med vacations' and that I had insisted that he continue his meds when he started refusing to take them. His current and past relationships are horrid and his lack of education is a real stumbling block. I also wish that I could have homeschooled him as he begged me to do but that was not possible. Try your best not to have lots of regrets like I do.

Your other child? Well, I was potty trained too but I still wet the bed some nights until I was 12, mind you, I said nights. I would 'dream' that I was on the potty. All of a sudden I quit and never saw a doctor about this. But, to sit on the couch and just 'go' appears to be more of a uninary tract problem or simply just being too engrossed in the TV or what he is doing, to get to the bathroom in time which I have learned is normal for boys but have him checked by the doctor to be sure there isn't anything 'medical' going on.

[Cricket1]

Traci--I have no ideas, just hugs. If the meds work--use them. As far as ds#2--you're doing the right thing by getting him to the doctor. Sounds like you are doing the right thing on both accounts.

[IntlMom]

Thanks for caring about what's going on in my house. My son had been on meds for about 5 years and had no ever had a "med break" till last fall......no I am wondering why we ever went off in the first place?!?! Life has been great in our house since he went back on them. He actally told me "thanks" for going back on them. He has played with the neighbor kids this weekend that all he ever did was bother and pester b4. Plz HIT ME if I ever say we are considering going off them again!
My other son has not "peed" since we had a conversation about going to the Dr. I think he just did not want to stop doing what he was doing. I will watch, however, and I will take him to the Dr if I see one more episode.......
thanks again.

[Samigirl]

I just wanted to say God bless you for rescuing these children.