I Don't Use It, but I Can't Part With It

**AmyBoz** · 11-11-2005, 08:07 AM

Do you have any items like this in your home?

We do. Our CD's. Five years ago when we bought our second home, we sold about one hundred of our CD's, and then when we moved into this house last year, we sold about 10 more. However, we still have approximately 50 CD's that we NEVER listen to, but we just can't seem to part with. It's ridiculous to have them because they just take up space, but I guess maybe there is the thought, what if I get rid of it and want to hear a song? The fact is, that's not even an excuse anymore with music downloadable online. Perhaps I'll work myself up to sell some of these CD's.

Do you have anything like that in your house?

**Jerseygirl** · 11-11-2005, 10:19 AM

So much is family things-specifically my great grandmother's bedroom lamp, I love it, but with so many kids in the house it just isn't a possibility to keep it out-if it was broken I would be crushed, so it is currently boxed in the basement, waiting for us to renivate and creat space!

**homesteadmamma** · 11-11-2005, 10:24 AM

I'd have to say books. Although like you Amy, we've gotten rid of many of them by donating to the library, there are still many I can't part with (mostly homeschooling ones).

**SHOPGIRL** · 11-11-2005, 01:48 PM

Yup, that's the story of my life. There are A LOT of things that I don't use: books, shoes, cd's. If they're in good condition it's hard to let go of them. Plus, you never know when you might want to use it. I've gotten better at giving things away, but I still have a long way to go.

**Nada.Leona** · 11-11-2005, 02:14 PM

DH is a firm believer in "DO NOT GIVE AWAY BOOKS!" Wouldn't matter if they were the most out-of-date texts or most rediculous stories. If it's in the form of a book, DH refuses to let it leave the house. He literally gets uncomfortable if he goes into a house and doesn't immediately see something to read. It's a strange thing, but I suppose it goes with being such an intellect. I myself can't part with magazines. I LOOOOOVE magazines. When I was in highschool, I collected 'Teen magazines and devoured them. I had magazines from as far back as 5 years before I was born!

When I finally moved out, Mom made me get rid fo them. It took myself and my brother each two trips with big black garbage bags to finally get rid of them. Now DH refuses to let me buy magazines because he knows what it is like with me and magazines.

**canadian gardener** · 11-11-2005, 02:42 PM

yes. absolutely.

I break them down like this:

#1
ones that I'm just not ready to part with for some reason I can't put my finger on yet. Those are "emotional withdrawal" items. Next purge they may go, or the one after that. Storing them in a box, dated helps, and if you go in and get something out, it's a keeper, but the rest gets tossed in a year or 5 years whatever you decide.

Don Aslett calls it an emotional withdrawal box. You don't pause in your purge to dither, if you can't decide, dump it in emotional withdrawal and keep decluttering, but later, if you need it, it's there and if you haven't gone into it in so many years (your choice) you can toss it without a backward glance.

#2:
the biggest category is sentimental reasons. Stuff that belonged to my mother who is dead, that I may or may not use but I like to touch it once in a while to reconnect. That kind of stuff is positive to have around.

A painting that you love to look at or a china cup and saucer that makes your heart sing or something like my mother's bible (which I don't read, I read my own, but I love to leaf thru it once in a while and see her notes in the margins).

They may not be directly useful, but they cause you to enjoy your life more for having them nearby. Other people may define them as clutter, and in fact they may be visual clutter that you prefer to tuck out of sight esp if selling your home, but it's yours to decide and enjoy. No rules here.

When something gives off emotional vibes that are sad or angry, due to the memories I try to get rid of those things no matter how valuable they are. The emotional withdrawal box is handy here if it's too hard to actually toss it in the giveaway or throwaway boxes.

#3:
the final category for me is stuff I plan to use down the road. this can really get out of hand, and it's the "if I haven't used it in the last year what makes me think I ever will again" category but some of these things are still keepers.

My homeschool books for example. I like loaning them out to hs friends, and having them get a workout that way. Dd has said she wants to hs her kids, and she wants the ones we've kept. I've had her in on the purge process with the homeschool books, so the ones we have are keepers.

Certain plumbing and electrical supplies fit in here like a plumbers snake. I might not use that more than once in five years, but it sure saves a nasty situation when the need arises, not to mention a nasty plumber's bill.

Some things other people might come into your home and say are clutter, but they aren't. they may need more creative storage. I'm thinking of my huge reference library which I use regularly but is rather unkempt looking. Eventually I'd like bookcases with doors that I can put lace or something under the glass to hide the visual noise.

**daddys3chicks** · 11-11-2005, 05:18 PM

I have a hard time with baby stuff - the crib and bassinette even though there will be no more babies. And sometimes things the girls got as gifts - especially if it is something from a family member.

**many houseapes** · 11-11-2005, 05:48 PM

I would have to say ditto on the baby stuff..i have just kept the basic stuff....crib,little rocking thing that baby can sit in, car seat, a few baby nighties, a bunting and 3 maternity dresses......just for 'what if we're blessed again?"(hoping so)..........next it would have to be the craft stuff. I have 2 totes in my closet and 1 big rubbermaid barrel in the garage that I keep my supplies in...every few months i go through things to try & declutter....a little bit

managed to set aside a bunch of beads to get rid of.

**canadian gardener** · 11-11-2005, 05:48 PM

I think it's ok if you have the room, otherwise, if you truly need to get rid of something like that, then take pictures of it, or cut a bit of the thing out and frame it with the picture of it.

Feeling like you "have to" get rid of stuff like that is what I meant when I talked about stuff that gives you good feelings just owning it. It's a wonderful touchable memory.

If you have the room, who is to say what is clutter and what is good collectibles.

I have the complete Star Trek novel collection. It is not clutter. I deeply enjoy it. But most people seeing it would probably tell me to get rid of the books after I've read them once. But what they don't understand is that I read books more than once if I love them, and I love those.

So be bold and keep some things, it's ok. Get rid of some real clutter to make room for the keepers. Keepers are things that give you good feelings back or are useful (in that order).

Bread and the hyacinths for the soul. We need both.

**seatosea** · 11-11-2005, 06:32 PM

We have a huge pitcher and bowl that is wasting away in the garage, it is so beautiful that I can't part with it..

Amy, I took all our CD's, threw the cases away and they fit in a really nice soft case that looks like a small piece of luggage.

**AmyMCGS** · 11-12-2005, 11:45 AM

For emotional reasons, I can't part with any of DD's baby stuff yet-- clothes, toys, furniture-- I have it all. Now, reasonably, we are wanting more children, so it's logical to keep a lot of it. We have a hard time getting pregnant, and I think a part of me feels like giving away the baby stuff would be like admitting that we won't be able to have more babies... which I'm not ready to think about yet.

**canadian gardener** · 11-12-2005, 12:24 PM

sea to sea, you shouldn't part with those. Someday, sometime you will find room. Just keep them safe so they don't get damaged and they will blossom in your home when there is room.

Toss something else to make room for the treasures. Those might be the hyacinths for your soul that you should decorate an entire room around.

Amy your dd is only 2, it's not practical to get rid of the baby things for a while, unless of course you are the kind who gets preggers when they toss them out, which has been known to happen. It's kind of a signal to the body that you've quit trying, the stress goes down and the pregnancy happens.

When you JUST CAN"T TOSS SOMETHING (and by toss you know I mean give away unless it's genuine trash)

It's telling you something, about that item. Think some more. Find out why.

But if you are in the place of being unable to toss enough to keep it clean and clear and uncluttered then you have to change your level of comfort with tossing.

**mommy2many** · 11-12-2005, 12:57 PM

For us it's clothing

Both DH and I have so many clothes and honestly I only wear the same four or five outfits so really I could throw away/give away/ sell all my other stuff and not really "Miss it" but I don't. DH just cleaned out his side of the closet last week and he only got rid of maybe four or five things.....we just can't seem to part witht hem.

For the children I would say that it is old toys that they never play with. I have started to get rid of them one by one and do you know they haven't even notcied