Any frugal ways

**treeluva** · 05-21-2006, 02:09 PM

to make the kids listen and clean their rooms? And make them realize that this isnt burger king, have it their way, right away? And also, get them to understand that momma aint made of money, and if they destroy their clothes, they are going to just have to go to school in funky clothes?

Sorry, just got a little frustrated today with my 4 year old and 7 year old. Especially at bedtime. The 7 year old goes to sleep with no problems, but the 4 year old.... I swear it has been the same struggle since she was old enough to put to bed. I feel like beating my head against the wall!

**ironmaiden** · 05-21-2006, 02:32 PM

I sympathize. We got the good eaters, not the good sleepers in this house.
I joke that if DH left me, it wouldn't be for another woman, it would be for a quiet place to sleep.

**frugalnana** · 05-21-2006, 02:33 PM

My kids had play clothes and then regular clothes. When they went to daycare or school they wore good clothes, when they came home they put the play clothes on. I started early in having them do chores. When I folded clothes I let them help with towels, just to teach them to be responsible. They helped take out trash also. When I cleaned I gave them something to do to help. When it was time to go to bed, we started a half hour early. Bath, story time and then bed time. Everyone has a different routine they used with kids, you probably need to try a few things to see what works. The older one was not a sleeper, so when he went to bed we knew he was going to sing or talk until he did fall asleep. It can be frustrating.

**treeluva** · 05-21-2006, 02:37 PM

Ah, but they ruin their clothes AT daycare and school!

We have a routine, bath, tuck in/talk time, and bed. The younger one just cries and cries.

The older one cleans her room, and takes out the trash, and basically, she will do anything I ask her to do, other than not ruin her clothes.

It is the younger one.... I can ask her to simply pick up her shoes and put them away, and she will fall to the floor and scream and kick and call me stupid mommy...... *sigh* she is so strong willed, which will be great when she is OLDER, as of right now, she needs to LISTEN!

**miss_thrifty** · 05-21-2006, 05:23 PM

both my kids have their own radio in their room and use it to go to sleep at nite. youngest was the same as yours for years, hard to get to bed and now, he falls asleep almost immeadetly. Also lots of running around outside before evening then quiet time, bath, snack, read a book to them(when they were small) youngest just recently quit the reading thing, he likes to read by himself before bed.

**Lorelei** · 05-22-2006, 07:43 AM

If your kids have totally destroyed their clothes, this won't help, but I've found that having a kid help with the repair of whatever they've attempted to destroy helps discourage them from doing it again. If you have to sew a patch on their jeans, they have to sit with you while you do it, with stained clothes, they can help with the stain removal then put them in the washer, etc.

**ironmaiden** · 05-22-2006, 01:44 PM

I found that with my son, bathtime before bed actually winds him up.
It's playtime for him, not wind down time. So we avoid pre-bedtime baths.
We try to either give him a quick shower in the morning or make his bath before his sister's.

**staceyy** · 05-22-2006, 08:36 PM

www.innertalk.com has a subliminal tape you can buy for about $20 that will have your kids cleaning in no time. It's called Neat and Clean.

**Seraph** · 05-23-2006, 07:53 AM

Originally Posted by staceyy

www.innertalk.com has a subliminal tape you can buy for about $20 that will have your kids cleaning in no time. It's called Neat and Clean.

Does it work on husbands too?

Seriously though, have you tried it? Does it really work?

**Early Bird** · 05-23-2006, 08:38 AM

Originally Posted by staceyy

www.innertalk.com has a subliminal tape you can buy for about $20 that will have your kids cleaning in no time. It's called Neat and Clean.

Oooh! That's tempting! If someone tries it, let us know if it works!

**canadian gardener** · 05-23-2006, 09:51 AM

LOL that tape sounds terrific.

While you are waiting for the express delivery heheheheh, here are some things that worked for me.

Put hooks at kid height behind the door. I had 3 hooks mounted on a board that I mounted on the wall behind the door to keep it hidden. One for jammies, one for play clothes, one for school clothes ALL of which we wore for 2 or more wearings. Even once we homeschooled we had play clothes and better ones for trips to town.

Leave an open crate for laundry where the kid strips off for bedtime.

Make sure each bedroom also has a wastebasket that you empty BEFORE it overflows. I've noticed an overflowing basket makes it hard for the kid to develop the toss it out routine.

Teach each kid to evaluate their toys and clothes, and put some in the give away box regularly.

This doesn't put the total responsibility on them, just a gentle start to a lifetime habit of thinking and then decluttering their lives.

Before bedtime help them clean up as part of their routine. Kids that young, esp the 4 yr old, but the 7 yr old too, need someone to work it along side them, gently redirecting. If you use my next suggestion it won't take long.

REDUCE TOYS and CLOTHING.

TOYS:
Find their bestest most favourite toys this way. For the next few weeks, just put all toys that nobody picked up in a box. They have to earn them back, by keeping their rooms neat. By 3 or 4 weeks you'll have a VERY clear idea what matters to them.

Do a quiet giveaway of the rest. You might help them give one or two away, but I suggest the bulk of the giveaways will be easier to let go of, if they don't see them going. After all if you keep them in a box and they are NOT redeemed time after time, you already know which are the keepers in your child's mind.

Doesn't matter who bought the toy or how much it cost. Right now it's clutter and it's making it hard for them to learn what neat and tidy is.

A less painful (to you) option would be to box up the toys in several boxes. Only one toy box out at a time, and switch in a week or month. If they never even notice the other boxes exist, again, get rid of the excess.

It's just like us with clutter and too many knick knacks. Less is faster and easier to clean up, and looks nicer too. You appreciate what you have.

NOW CLOTHING:
One on the kid, one in the drawer, one in the wash. Some prefer a weeks worth. But more than a weeks worth is too hard to handle.

Plus a dress up outfit for Sunday and parties. Keep it nice by only using it for special occaisions.

I had nice clothes for school, about 3 sets, and another 3 or so sets of play clothes for after school. Plus 2 sunday bests.

That habit of taking off and changing to play clothes is a lifetime good habit that will keep them from ruining a work wardrobe by cooking dinner in it or gardening in it later as adults. It really is worth teaching.

If drawers, closet poles and shelves are bursting then it's too much effort to shoehorn the clean stuff back in for mum and for kid, and stuff bursts back out when they go in looking in a hurry for their favourites.

If the day care/school wrecks the clothes, then only send them in play clothes which you get at the Salvation Army on the bag sale days. When it's really wrecked toss it, and add in another.

I suggest a clothing allowance at some point, where the child becomes responsible to budget and buy their clothing. You will need to work at this with them very closely so that they don't buy one trendy pair of jeans and blow the entire budget.

Children need to be taught in small bites.

**treeluva** · 05-23-2006, 11:25 AM

Those are some good suggestions.

As far as the toys.... I could seriously throw ALL of them away, and the 4 year old would not care. I know this, because I have taken ALL of her toys away, and currently, she only has about 2-3 boxes of them back. Sure, she cried when I put her Dora in the box.... but then she got all defiant and said, "well, TAKE THIS TOO, THEN! MOMMY!" and started throwing all her toys in the boxes. I heard her at night saying, "i wish I had my Dora" to herself, but she would *never* ask me for it. When I brought up Dora, she just said, "I DONT HAVE A DORA!" Little angel, my 4 year old baby is.

I will try some of these suggestions though. thanks so much, everyone!

**staceyy** · 05-23-2006, 12:37 PM

I have the tape and it really works! It will work on you and or anyone who hears it. I read a lot of testimonials on the tape before I bought it. They have a free catalog with hundreds of tapes and they have a website. Both contain testimonials. I bought my tape several years ago and I got to choose what sounds the tape would have in the background. Such as ocean waves, nature or music. No talking can be heard.