marriage tips?

[Sara Noel]

What tips do you have that have made your relationship work? If you were going to give advice to your children or a friend, what types of marriage/relationship advice or tips would you give?

[bumplett]

* compromise.

[Persimmon Lace]

Do premarital counseling, meet his/her parents to see the family dynamics and remember we are all human.

[McD]

Never go to bed angry.
Don't blow up over small things.
Compromise.
Communicate.

[stinkbug]

Communication!

[Darlene]

Good one Bumplett!
Another big one to me anyways is:
Be polite. Sounds small & simple but it's huge. Just because this person has been with you for so many years doesn't mean they like to be taken for granted. Say please and thank you. Ask if they need/want something while you are up. Just plain be nice to one another.

[Jamauk]

One we just realized we've kind of forgot about -

Always remember you were a couple before you were parents. Make time for your relationship with one another - as husband and wife - not just Mommy & Daddy. Even if it means putting the kids to bed early and enjoying a romantic dinner at the dining room table - with the good china - its sssooo important!


This may not be a popular one - but I also believe in letting the kids hear us argue. We don't have knock down drag out screaming matches, but we do get into discussions and it gets tense from time to time. But, the kids can see that we talk through it and once its all over, we still love each other. Conflict resolution is a HUGE thing to teach your children and I'm afraid not very many people do it.

Now - if the arguement seems to have one of us especially upset or if it doens't look like we'll get resolution anytime soon, we may put a movie on for the kids and go to our room - but that doens't happen very often.

[boogiemum]

some great ones so far!

dream together, plan together. without those 2 things, it would be too easy to drift apart.

[dwallyfam]

Definetly talk about finances before you get married. Talk about saving, spending, retirement, and what type of lifestyle you want to have. Who will handle money and if you want to have joint or seperate accounts.

[larabelle]

Read the book and try to apply the principles of the book "Created to be his help meet" by Debi Pearl.

[PrairieRose]

Eliminate the word 'divorce' from your vocabulary. When you do that you have to find ways to make it work. Otherwise you're always looking for an excuse to get out.

Also, remember that when you're feeling a certain way (negatively speaking) that your spouse either is or has felt the same way.

[Nantahala]

Talk about all the biggies before the marriage - kids, money, family, holidays, religion... and communicate truthfully and be willing to compromise.

[Mom23boys]

Remember to compliment each other. Both spouses like to hear how well they did something, how good they look today, etc.

DH and I never leave for work, for the store, etc. without giving a good-bye kiss. Before we hang up on the phone after talking to each other, we always say "I love you." It is just simple things, but it reminds the other person that you care about them.

[carlitasway]

Try to say I love you as much as possible. It's easy to forget. There will be days you don't like your spouse and that's ok and normal. Talk about how you feel.

[Cricket1]

Choose your battles, choose your battles, choose your battles. When we were first married, we fought over EVERYTHING. Now, each of us knows what to let roll off our backs and we know what's truly important. Also--marry your best friend.