FV Writing Challenge!! Join in!!!

**forHISglory** · 05-27-2008, 10:31 AM

Hey Fellow Villagers!
Here's a different kind of challenge for all of us writers: the would-be's, wanna-be's, newbies, do-be-do-be-do's and Toyenbee's.

I'll post an opener for a story. Here's the details:
1. Read the opener.
2. Write the next few paragraphs. You don't need to finish the story. And you aren't adding on to someone else's story. Just write the paragraphs that would follow the opener.
3. Try to develop character, give a sense of setting, and begin your plot. Try to intrigue us into wanting to read more! Be creative and don't be afraid to let your style come through. Throw in appropriate dialouge.
4. The challenge will be open for a week, closing on Tuesday, June 3. I'll read entries that evening and post the winner. Judging is really subjective, but I'll try my best!
5. Big prizes: a FV hug and lots of congrats from your fellow writers!!!!!!
6. Then someone can start a new story opener, and away we go!

And now..... the opener:

Ice cream. Again. He peered warily into the little white cup. Caramelpeanutbuttersomething? It looked too gooey, too sticky, too sugary-sweet. Were there any little chocolate nuggets? Any nuts? Oh, please, no peanuts. Briefly closing his eyes, he waved his fingers and shook his head.

Ok. You have the opener. Who is this guy? Where is he? What's going on?
-a chemist for an ice cream manufacturer?
-a diabetic weight watcher being held against his will by terrorists?
-a judge in a home-made ice cream contest at the state fair?
-a daddy with little ones trying to treat him for Father's Day?
-You can come up with ideas better than this!!!!!!!

Give us your best! We know you can do it!!

**PrairieRose** · 05-27-2008, 11:04 AM

I'll give it a go.....it sounds like great fun!

It had been a really long time since he'd had his favorite ice cream, cherry chocolate chip. Thinking back he couldn't remember exactly how long, but he knew as he peered into this cup it had been a very long time. A feeling of homesickness welled up within him thinking of happier times when he heard children's voices laughing, squealing and sometimes bickering in the background. If he ate this gooey concoction that stared him in the face now would he be able to get a little closer to those times...those places in his memory? Or would he be destined to live out his life in the quiet misery he has come to know as his reality since having 'snapped'. Oh it has been a long time since he'd had his favorite ice cream.....cherry chocolate chip.

next?

**forHISglory** · 05-27-2008, 09:31 PM

Thanks, Prairie Rose! You have a nice wistful tone to this piece, and you took it in an interesting direction.

Any more Villagers up for the challenge?

**MirandaK** · 05-28-2008, 09:22 AM

give me a day or 2...I'm in!!

**MirandaK** · 05-28-2008, 10:19 AM

So I probably should wait to post this and develop it more but I have a busy 2 days ahead at work so here it is...

It was like he didn’t exist anymore…like he had no desires or needs of his own. What he received from this marriage was just an extension of what the baby wanted. His disconnect was so complete that he didn’t even use the child’s name anymore. It was just the baby. He didn’t even remember what their marriage was like in the 10 brief months before she had given birth. Now, 2 years later, he had become superfluous, invisible, lost.

When his wife acknowledged him it was to talk about the baby. He honestly didn’t think she noticed him anymore. He was vessel to receive the latest news about the baby. Beyond that, he served no purpose.

And lately, the baby wanted ice cream.

Be gentle...I wrote this quickly!

**luv-my-lexi** · 05-28-2008, 11:25 AM

Oh, why did he even pick up the sample of free ice cream when he had been doing so well trying to keep the weight off?? When he was in school, ice cream had been his favorite treat. He closed his eyes again....if he was only back in sports in school again, before that fateful day when it all changed.

It had been raining and the field was wet and slippery. He should have held onto the ball but heard the snap as he was landing.......

Okay so it is not much but I never claimed to be a writer....LOL

**Cricket1** · 05-28-2008, 12:19 PM

He knew that any other kid would die for a mother that spooned out ice cream morning, noon, and night. But then again, he also knew that any other kid didn't have a mother that woke up briefly, only to dish out a few scoops, ask some obligatory and uninterested questions about school and then went back to bed.

This was how it went everyday since his father moved out. Perhaps "moved out" wasn't the right term. That suggested that his father had actively moved something. In actuality, "moved out" consisted of his mother cramming things into kitchen sized Hefty bags and screaming about how she'd given up everything for that bastard.

He left thoughts of ice cream and garbage bags at the kitchen table, got up and turned on the tube. Ahh!!! There it was, instant relief. Filled with suspense, history, and family heirlooms. Kids in his class ridiculed him every chance they got about his obsession with "Antiques Roadshow", but what did they know? Those idiots didn't know the difference between an 18th century, mahogany, Chippendale chair and a cheap, particle board knock off found in most Holiday Inns.

**MirandaK** · 05-28-2008, 12:32 PM

Cricket, I love it!!

**forHISglory** · 05-28-2008, 02:03 PM

Cricket, MirandaK, luv My Lexi: Thanks! It is so interesting to see how you moved from the opening paragraph into your unique characterization and situation. Very nice use of language to leave an impression! And in a few words, you have intrigued the reader to continue. Way to go!

**Momto2Boyz** · 05-28-2008, 02:25 PM

Ok, I had to be really careful not to read any of the other stories on my way down the page!

Ice cream. Again. He peered warily into the little white cup. Caramelpeanutbuttersomething? It looked too gooey, too sticky, too sugary-sweet. Were there any little chocolate nuggets? Any nuts? Oh, please, no peanuts. Briefly closing his eyes, he waved his fingers and shook his head.

He crumpled the paper cup and tossed it into the nearest waste can as he walked along the pathway. He didn't even remember entering the park or buying the ice cream from the cart vendor. Looking back now at the vendor, he knew that tossing that ice cream was the best decision he'd made all week. The man had a long greasy ponytail, hairy arms, and smelled like he hadn't bathed in at least a week.

He sat on the park bench and looked blindly out into the crowd of mothers nursing children on park benches, students throwing a frisbee on the grass and families picnicing and lounging in the sunshine. All carefree. All happy. Something he, himself, hadn't been in a very long time. He didn't know why he had thought the ice cream would help. Maybe because as a child, his mother would take him for ice cream whenever he had suffered a skinned knee as a child or heartache as a weary teenager.

He knew ice cream couldn't heal this wound. This wound was too deep. He still couldn't believe she was gone. Packed up her things while he was at work and simply moved on. It had taken them fifteen years to build the life together that she was able to pack up into boxes in a single day.

**forHISglory** · 05-28-2008, 02:43 PM

Mom to 2 Boyz: Thanks! Nice details about the park to set up a calm serenity. That in turn is such a vivid contrast with the man's inner environment.

**forHISglory** · 05-29-2008, 11:50 AM

BUMP!
There is still time to enter this writing contest! Let your creativity go for a few lines. We've had some great entries so far.

Now it's your turn! Contest ends Tuesday, June 3.

**Frugal Nurse** · 05-29-2008, 12:13 PM

ughhh.. another day. Soft food. Any man would love to be in this hospital with this pretty nurse. Not me.

God! This stuff is making me sick! Did they putting something in this ice cream? Is that a pill? powder? what IS that?

bleh... I think I'm imaging things.. God! I hate this place!

what a pretty nurse....

Why do I have to eat this stuff? jello for breakfast, ice cream for snack, broth for lunch.... where are my teeth! Grrrrrr!
God! I hate this place!
What a pretty nurse...

"Nurse? where's my steak!? and I want a beer! Can I have a beer?"

"There, there, Mr. Oletimah, it's time for your enema....."

**forHISglory** · 05-29-2008, 12:19 PM

Frugal Nurse: Great details! "Jello, broth, ice cream...." I especially enjoyed the man's last name; that was clever. Thanks for submitting.

**forHISglory** · 05-30-2008, 05:33 PM

BUMP BUMP!!
It's Friday! Can you get your creativity fired up over the weekend and join in the writing contest? Contest ends Tuesday, June 3. Hope to see your entry!