a sick goldfish, and a broken childs heart.

**Dancing Lotus** · 11-15-2010, 01:44 PM

My dd is a proud goldfish parent. She has three and takes excellent care of them. They are very dear to her. When she got up this morning her first baby was swimming upside down. She didn't want to go to school because she was worried she needed to be home to care for her fish. I promised to do my best and now I can't believe I am trying to feed a goldfish peas because i read it will cure a sick float bladder. I am praying it doesn't die before she gets home so she won't blame me for not saving it.
I love my dd's big heart but days like these kill me. This is why I do not want anymore pets.

**akolb** · 11-15-2010, 02:28 PM

Don't write off pets for her. I had pets my whole life and it's helped me learn responsibility and how to care for something other than myself.
I remember my pets dying as a child. It's part of life and an important part for kids to learn. Explain to her that sometimes animals are old or sick and no matter how good of a goldfish mommy she is, they die. Tell her that she made him happy while she was taking care of him and that she is still taking good care of the other 2.

That's all I got!

**crafty73** · 11-15-2010, 02:38 PM

Awww, sorry to hear of your dd's sick goldfish. I hope it gets better soon.

It's heartwrenching as a parent to see your child's heart break over the loss of a much loved pet. When my boys were little and if they ended up losing a pet to old age, illness etc, i always talked with them about the cycle of life & death etc and we always honoured that pet's life somehow (usually a burial and everyone had a chance to say a few words about Fluffy etc) and sometimes included drawings etc they wanted buried with their pet etc. It gave them a sense that it is ok to grieve over the loss and the burial/memorial gave them the opportunity to say or draw or however they choose to express themselves a chance say 'good bye' in whatever way they feel is meaningful to them. After the "funeral" we'd talk about how important it is to cherish those we love and how important it is to live life to the fullest etc. Then when my dad was still alive he'd show up with a 'poor homeless baby kitten' he happened to "find" and ofcourse he couldn't take the poor critter home and sure enough it would be love at first site once my kids laid eyes on the new kitten lol Of course that's not always a logical choice and it has to be handled carefully as some kids will reject the thought of 'replacing' their beloved so-so but with some kids it seems to help their broken hearts heal a bit quicker.

**Dancing Lotus** · 11-15-2010, 05:37 PM

Well this isn't her first loss this year. She already lost one fish a few months ago and she made us have a funeral. She also lost a cat, one who lived a lot longer then we thought it would but still.

**Debbie-cat** · 11-15-2010, 07:34 PM

I hope the fish gets better! I feel so bad for your little one.

**Labontet** · 11-15-2010, 07:40 PM

I feel bad for your dd. It is so hard loosing a pet, but it is a fact of life and death that we all have to learn.

It still does not make it easy for her or you.
Hugs

**Palooka** · 11-15-2010, 07:45 PM

I'm sure that is hard for her and the poor fishy. It's just part of growing up though. Reminds me of a Cosby episode when they gave Rudy's goldfish a funeral. Hope your fish makes it!

**Squidge** · 11-15-2010, 07:51 PM

Originally Posted by AnnK

Well this isn't her first loss this year. She already lost one fish a few months ago and she made us have a funeral. She also lost a cat, one who lived a lot longer then we thought it would but still.

I can't imagine how hard it is watching your DD worry over her beloved pet and even harder still to watch her grieve for ones she's lost

.

Originally Posted by crafty73

When my boys were little and if they ended up losing a pet to old age, illness etc, i always talked with them about the cycle of life & death etc and we always honoured that pet's life somehow (usually a burial and everyone had a chance to say a few words about Fluffy etc) and sometimes included drawings etc they wanted buried with their pet etc. It gave them a sense that it is ok to grieve over the loss and the burial/memorial gave them the opportunity to say or draw or however they choose to express themselves a chance say 'good bye' in whatever way they feel is meaningful to them. After the "funeral" we'd talk about how important it is to cherish those we love and how important it is to live life to the fullest etc.

I really agree with how important this is. Growing up we always had cats and over the years some died - the "funerals" we had really helped, for me at least, because I felt like not only had the pet been properly honoured, but that the "grown-ups" (especially those who were least upset) acknowledged how sad I was and made me feel like it was okay to grieve.

That being said, I hope her goldfish gets better

**Neeley** · 11-15-2010, 08:23 PM

I was so worried about upsetting my kids when their beta fish died, I told them I took Diamond (the fish) to the vet. Then I bought another one just like the one who died. I did this about four years (Diamond was replaced many times over) until DD busted me. Now, they look back and make fun of me for telling them Diamond had to get antibiotics and ICU care at the vet.

I do hope her goldfish gets better. Seeing them sad, upset or hurt is never easy. Especially when there is not much we can do to ease their pain.

**fairydana** · 11-15-2010, 11:04 PM

awww!! I hope the goldfish gets better!! Bless her big heart!!

**Dancing Lotus** · 11-17-2010, 07:56 PM

Fishy did not make it.
I would have replaced him if she had not made him so fat that a look a like was out of the question.

She is a huge animal lover. Last night we went to the circus and she commented several times about her concern for the animals.
'They should not be in cages like that".
I didn't' bother to point out the irony of keeping fish in a bowl.