Thinking of a new addition....

**dianne9106** · 12-08-2007, 10:13 PM

I know it sounds like I am building onto my house. I just need to a get some opinions and feedback. Here is our situation:
I am 36, but DH 27. I have one DS from a previous relationship that is 16 years and we have a DD together that will be 2 years in JAN 08.
I am really feeling broody (meaning wanting another baby). I have had this feeling off and on for the past year -so much that I trained to become a doula in the UK hoping that would solve the trick. It did for a little while.
I had such the ideal birth with my DD. Labor 1 1/2 hours, water birth in a British Hospital with a 6 hour discharge. Very close to a home birth!! I had my DD at 8:30 am and was home cooking lunch by 2 pm that afternoon!
Now we are living back in that states and we recieve our healthcare on the military post. Of course a benefit of being in the military - healthcare is provided for us. But they don't have a birthing pool and make you stay for 48 hours even if you have a normal birth!! I would love a home birth this time - we have a good size tub. It's finding a midwife in our area - they are not that popular here for house calls!
We are now thinking very seriously of another baby. However, we would have to get hot - as DH will be gone for 9 months next year starting in April. I have asked my DS what he thinks about having another sibling so far from his age - he seems fine with it. I reckon you could say that I have two only children - they don't really affect each other or have jealously issues at all. Basically my DS would barely know our new baby - as he will be off to college or the military in a year and half.
We are pretty much out of debt with the exception of our house payment and paying off the auto loan. We would have to enclose our bonus room for a new baby, we only have three bedrooms. I am a believer in children and babies needing their own space. I breastfeed both children, but my daughter slept in her nursery when she was two days old. She didn't want to sleep in our room - too much noise with talking and reading and having the lights on. I was shattered! Though I do not have any hand-me-downs - I sold or donated or passed everything on! I reckon - it's back out to the thrift store for me!! I have decided that if we did have another baby we would buy a used car seat carrier and I would get a handmade cover to go on it to coordinate with my daughters buggy!
Some other info. I suffered two miscarriages in 2004 before I got pregnant with DD and then I reckon you could say that I had a third - as I lost her twin early on. Otherwise my health is excellent. I may have to have a c-section with another baby - I had a bladder sling put in this year due to stress incontinence. But I could deliver naturally without any problems.
So, I am looking for opinions and feedback from folks that been my same situation or if they are thinking about the same thing or maybe they just have an opinion to share.
Thank you in advance and I am sorry this is sooo long.

**monkeymia** · 12-09-2007, 01:31 AM

I think you have weighted it up very well and I think if you and DH want another child, go for it.

**karone** · 12-11-2007, 07:45 AM

if u havent already u should check out pregnancyweekly.com thats where i was when pregnant with merrick. jason and i are considering having another also. i would need to lose about 40 to 50 pounds b4 doing it. gl if u guys try again.

**thriftstorequeen** · 12-11-2007, 04:42 PM

Sounds like you've thought this through. My hubby and I didn't practice birth control till after our last son was born. I had my tubes done and I've been sorry ever since. We have 5 surviving children and we lost 3. I love having a large family. But I think it is totally up to you'all how many you have. I have brother with only one.She' great and they are all happy. I studied to be a doula too. It is so cool you had a water birth. I'm glad it went so well for you.As far as finding room in your home for more, we always seemed too. We lived in a trailer once and had to put the baby crib in the livingroom. I wouldn't change a thing on what we might have done without. What we have is priceless ! Best Wishes!

**yonksgirl** · 12-11-2007, 04:57 PM

Sounds like you have a great plan! Congrats!!! Maybe we will get preggers around the sametime! LOL!

**dianne9106** · 12-12-2007, 07:11 PM

Hiya!
Thank you all for your input and advice! I am getting my IUD taken out tomorrow. It's a ParaGard, so we won't have to worry about the hormones. Of course I am realistic - it could take a week or forever. I will keep everyone updated!
Dianne