What in the heck are they thinking ? Some people are just plain rude.

**leezza** · 08-02-2008, 04:34 PM

I have manners but.........if someone opens the door to bad behavior then I figure they have coming whatever it is appropriate for me to dish their way!

JMHO,
leezza

**shoiji** · 08-02-2008, 07:42 PM

I am sorry to hear what you are going through. Sure some people may have difficulty discussing your situation with you but if they keep on stressing you out tell them straight out they are causing you stress and that is the last thing you need now!

I am always amazed with what people ask me. One being "What are you?" Human comes to mind.

**Pemberleyan** · 08-02-2008, 08:08 PM

I'm so sorry about what you're going through and that you've been experiencing rude people.

I thought I'd share a couple of things that have been said to me, not comparable really, but they should make you laugh.

I moved away from this small town for several years and returned at about age 27. I was extremely emotional at times about the fact that I didn't have a boyfriend, much less a husband, so it didn't help when a local middle-aged man said to me, "You never did marry, did you?" as if it was certainly too late now.

The rudest was just recently when I ran into an elderly man who had known me since childhood. (I'm now mid-40's.) He said -- and I quote -- "You done gained a WHOLE LOTTA WEIGHT, AIN'T YA?" I had to ask him to repeat it and he did, verbatim. I stammered some sort of response, but it wasn't until later that I thought of what I should have said. "Oh, thanks! Even though I have mirrors and scales at home, I wouldn't have had a clue!"

The last and possibly the funniest, also regarding weight, was when I ran into an associate who hadn't seen me since the last several pounds had been gained. He was so shocked that he had not immediately recognized me, and obviously trying to avoid saying anything about my weight, he came up with this line: "Oh, your eyes used to be so big." No kidding.

**SewCrafty** · 08-02-2008, 08:35 PM

Oh KC, I know what you are going through. I am a breast cancer survior too, just celebrated my 5th anniversary. Honey you CAN and WILL do it too!

It is all in the mind, think positive thoughts and kick the negatives (including so called friends ) to the CURB!!!

Your friend, isn't really a friend at all if she repeated what her mom said about your little girl. YOU know she is special and SHE knows she is special, who cares what others say?

If you ever need to talk or need a shoulder, I am here for you, just pm me. YOU ARE going to beat this, and hopefully we will someday have a cure for us all.

**cottageliving** · 08-03-2008, 07:19 PM

I am sorry that you are going through so much right now.

It might be in your best interest to distance yourself from these 'friends' for a while so you can more easily stay focused on the positive and on your wonderful family.

We often learn who our real friends are during difficult times, and our real friends oftentimes are not the ones we would have expected.

Hang in there, and know that you are loved, loved, loved by many.

Jen

**heartofmine** · 08-03-2008, 07:42 PM

I just wanted to add that I am so sorry for what you are going through. I am a cancer survivor myself only I had uteran cancer. I will keep you in my prayers if it is okay. I know what the good Lord can do.

**Wendy99** · 08-03-2008, 09:21 PM

sorry you are having to deal with people that are saying those things

**Katybird** · 08-03-2008, 09:28 PM

I think that the best reply to unwanted questions is "I will forgive you for asking if you will forgive me for not answering" . It is a shame that some people have no sense when it comes to tact and compassion.

**angelbumpkin** · 08-03-2008, 09:43 PM

I am so sory that people are being so rude and disrespectful to you and your daughther.
I pray you will meet people who will surround you with an abundance of love and respect.

May you be surround by God love daily.
Hugs and Prayers

**frugalbabe** · 08-04-2008, 01:11 AM

First of all huge hugs on what you are going through. You sound like you are very vibrant and have a great sense of humor! I have four healthy kids but I lost two pregnancies and I know people were trying to be helpful but I got so tired of the "just be grateful for the kids you have" or "you're lucky it happened early in the pregnancy" at least I have learned what to say and not to say when someone I know goes through the same thing.