what can i do?

[rosey7415]

or should i say what is appropriate to do?

my neighbor's mother just died. he is devastated. i met her once. i am very friendly with his wife. what can i do? i am sending a sympathy card. i will attend the wake...........is there anything i can do for him? if it was his wife i would probably send over a dish or something.....hmmmm.......anyone?

[nodmicks]

I'd still send over a dish. There is so much running around and stress involved that I'm sure they would appreciate it. I know in the 4 close family member deaths the last few years we have spent $ eating out due to running around and just being too exhausted to cook. You are so nice to think of them

[Contrary Housewife]

Let them know you are thinking/praying for them. Visit like normal. If you feel you can support them, say that they can call/visit any time or ask you if they need anything.

[fernykins]

I would send over a meal of some sort. I know when my son I died I cost me a small fortune just to feed my family. We had one meal out after the service and it cost me over 700.00. None of my family have or had any money. You could also ask if they needed any help with anything. Sometimes just the offer lightens the load.
Fern

[dcompton]

I would send something over too. That is just a gesture of sympathy and support. I don't see how they could take it amiss.

[shoiji]

After a couple of weeks have them over for brunch on the weekend. They both might enjoy getting out of the house and a change of pace.

[zakity]

I would send over a meal. Something nummy that could be eaten for breakfast would be good also.

[sinopa27]

you can send over a dish like a casserole for example. Or you can send paper plates, cups, napkins and plastic forks. When there are a lot of people visiting, no one wants to do dishes.

[Debbie-cat]

I would send over a dish. They would appreciate not only the support but also that they wouldn't have to cook for one night.

[alarosalpn]

When my husband passed people gave me gift cards to the grocery store,brought food over,paper products so I didnt have to worry about a mess...These things were greatly appreciated..

[rosey7415]

went to the wake this evening. sent the card. tomorrow i will be making a casserole for them. i told them at the wake that if there was anything i could do for them....anything at all to just let us know. i think they were very glad that we came. zakity....something for breakfast also seems like a good idea. i never gave that a thought....like a basket with a variety of jams, bagels, muffins, etc.....that kind of thing? i could do that in a few days. she said that they were numb with going through her papers, etc. (looking for prepaid arrangements)

[zakity]

I was thinking like a banana or zuchini (sp?) bread or muffins, but that basket sounds way better.

[Libby]

The food idea seems to be popular. Food gift cards for places that have take out or delivery are great too. Casseroles and soups are nice but what about fresh stuff - fruits, veggies & dips, salads etc?

[mh3rdwheel]

you can send over a dish like a casserole for example. Or you can send paper plates, cups, napkins and plastic forks. When there are a lot of people visiting, no one wants to do dishes.

I would also do the same, I just found out that my cousin lost his wife on Monday at the age of 50, they live in columbus, ohio and I don't have the money to go but sent condolences and flowers.

I would send them over meals maybe for the next week (if possible), paper plates, cups, napkins, etc, but also maybe help setting up the food if for a service or heating it up then taking it over.

[rosey7415]

okey it is over....the funeral was today. she only had 2 people back to her house. i had left her a message that i had supper made for her and to call me when she was free/no company that i would bring it over. she came with her hubby instead and was going to relax on my patio with us. we all were waiting as a storm was approaching. all of a sudden the wind started whipping and it started raining so suddenly that we all scattered and will do it again soon. so i may just invite her over this weekend for breakfast on the patio. they looked so whipped after the day they had.......i felt so bad.

thank you all for your suggestions. i feel good about what i did do now. what else would i do without you fv'ers??